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AIBU?

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Original poster

To think that vagina is not the only word for it?

201 replies

superstarheartbreaker · 07/06/2014 09:11

Dd and I call it a noo noo or foo foo. She is 4. Lots of people say that vagina is the only acceptable term but it sounds so clinical. At this age I think noo noo is fine...and cute.I dont even call it a vagina.

OP posts:
Original poster
superstarheartbreaker · 07/06/2014 09:12

5 sorry.

OP posts:
Spurtle · 07/06/2014 09:12

You do know this is going to get heated, don't you? Grin

cardibach · 07/06/2014 09:14

I doubt she really means vagina, does she? Can't think of many situations when a 5 year old would need to be that specific.

Silvercatowner · 07/06/2014 09:15

This reminds me of a very surreal conversation two of my friends had when our kids were little (25 years ago). The two friends of mine did not know each other well. One had 'winkle' as the name they used for penis. The other used 'winkle' as their pet name for their son. The ensuing conversation and the raised eyebrows was very amusing.

(I can't bear noo noo or foo foo.... too bloody cutesy.)

PourquoiTuGachesTaVie · 07/06/2014 09:15

Vulva.

Icelollycraving · 07/06/2014 09:18

Mini & willy,don't think it needs to be anatomical terms but each to their own. I shall remove the splinters from my arse from sitting on the fence.

PrincessBabyCat · 07/06/2014 09:18

I don't think she needs to know vulva or anything like that. But I think the issue with cutesy names like that is that someone is touching her and she tells another adult they may not know what she's trying to say and dismiss it.

MoominAndMiniMoom · 07/06/2014 09:24

I'm not going to teach my DD to use a word I don't even use Grin I call mine foof colloquially and bits at the doctors and places like that (not that I try to make a habit of talking about it)... oh and 'cave of wonders' to OH Blush but I'll teach her 'bits' or 'privates', so there's no cutesy "hmm i wonder what she's talking about" if there's ever an issue.
I sound stupid saying 'vulva', I'm not going to inflict that on DD Grin Is a childcare provider really going to refuse to listen to a child talking about potential sexual abuse just because they use 'bits' or 'mini' as opposed to vulva? These are well known phrases for genitals by now. Mini, flower, foof, twinkle... if a child came up to me and said someone was touching them there, I'd understand what they meant. If I didn't, I'd ask them to point it out.

The fence is well and truly sat on.

nibbers · 07/06/2014 09:32

I need to think about this too. I have always used the word Willy or just privates to refer to the general area (as in 'your privates are private').

Not sure about girls bits though. Embarrassingly am not good on anatomy and wouldnt know which bit was which. I do need a word though and would be intrigued to hear my 2 year old pronounce vagina!

PrincessBabyCat · 07/06/2014 09:34

Moomin Yes, except sometimes kids don't say it like "X is touching my mini" that is a direct way that no matter what word on the end of a sentence should prompt further questioning.

I forget where I heard it but some girl didn't get help because she kept telling the school nurse that someone was "putting cookies in her cookie jar" and they didn't know what she meant.

LadyNexus · 07/06/2014 09:36

It is a front bum.

Until she can pronounce or for some reason need to specifically refer to it as a vagina Grin

Sparklingbrook · 07/06/2014 09:37

We need a topic for this all of it's own. Grin

Methe · 07/06/2014 09:37

It's willy and fanny in this house. Same as It was when I was growing up... Despite this Hideous use of language I am quite capable of using the correct anatomical term when speaking a medical professionals.

Mn has a real bee it's bonnet about cutesy names for genitals. I just don't see the issue :-\

KeepingUpAnon · 07/06/2014 09:38

I have boys and they have a 'willy' and 'bits' (ds1 once referred to his 'ball sack' after hearing dh say it, which I was not impressed with...it just sounds so awful coming from a 6 year old).

I don't refer to girls bits at all...the only thing they know is that mummy and girls in general have a bum, but no willy.

I wouldn't use the term 'vagina' to a girl. It just sounds so...I don't know. Yes, it's technically correct and all that, but the thought of a little girl talking about her vagina makes me cringe. If we had a girl it would probably be 'mini'.

eurochick · 07/06/2014 09:41

Vagina probably isn't the right term. At 5 I doubt she is even aware that she has a 3rd hole down there. So you want something more general for the whole area, not just the birth canal bit.

LivinLaVidaLocal · 07/06/2014 09:41

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

TitsCrossed · 07/06/2014 09:41

We use penis/willy and vulva/fanny here. The kids need to know the correct and slang names.

I have experience with child protection and the knowing of the correct anatomical names is exceptionally important.

KeepingUpAnon · 07/06/2014 09:45

Like a pp said, I do think it's ridiculous to not give a child a colloquial name for their bits due to the 'risk' of someone not knowing what they are talking about if there was abuse. Unless you purposely think up a name completely out-there and random, i'd be pretty confident that any adult will know what a child means.

If a child came to you and talked about their twinkle, foof, fanny, tuppence, flower, mini, bits, noonoo, foofoo, willy etc...you'd know exactly what they were talking about. They don't have to say the word 'vagina' or 'penis' so that others understand.

Marrow · 07/06/2014 09:46

Your DD won't even know she's got a vagina at her age. My eight year old had only just learned of its existence.

KeepingUpAnon · 07/06/2014 09:47

I have experience with child protection and the knowing of the correct anatomical names is exceptionally important

I also have experience with child protection. I have never dealt with one case where lack of the correct term has had any impact at all. I see so many child-professionals bandying this around and I just don't get it.

DeepThought · 07/06/2014 09:49

It's not vagina, superstar, it's vulva. Those lots of people you know who call their vulva vagina are silly billies.

Canthisonebeused · 07/06/2014 09:50

My dd uses front and back bottom in every day use. She knows all the part atomically too. But it's ok in every day use to name anything what you like. Personally I don't like ditsy names and find it odd that anyone would find any name assigned to a child's genitals as cute.

fledermaus · 07/06/2014 09:50

Personally I say vulva, as I don't think most young children are really aware the vagina exists? Though a friend's 5 year old did find out when she got a marble up there Grin

However, I don't really mind minnie or foofoo or even fanny though.

DeepThought · 07/06/2014 09:51

Keepingup I agree

In safeguarding training this is always brought up as an anecdotal Awful Warning if you see what I mean

AuntieStella · 07/06/2014 09:52

NSPCC had an ad recently in which it said "it doesn't matter what you call it, tell someone" so the CP angle really doesn't seem to stack up.

Yes, DC need to know correct names for body parts.

But yes, they also need day to day terms. To me, it's silly and limiting to deprive them of either.

There is never a problem in expecting a child to understand that their belly button is also their navel and also their umbilicus. If you're discussing boys' anatomy, there's never any difficulty with willy also being penis.

The problem here is that there is no universally accepted day to day term for either vagina or vulva.

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