Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

See all MNHQ comments on this thread

PIL Issue. Need some perspective.

999 replies

NameChangedForPILissue · 17/02/2014 12:42

NC'd for obvious reasons.

PIL are very well off. Rich enough that MIL doesn't and has never worked. FIL earns a huge amount, and is unbelievably tight with it too (refuses to update 25 year old kitchen, 30 year old bathroom, won't buy MIL a new car even though hers is verging on dangerous, won't spend more than £10 per GC at christmas etc).

They are set to become millionaires with some inheritance that is probably due to come in the next year or two. For now they live on their £200k+ a year income with very little expenditure.

For the past 8 years, they have given us money every month to help with our living expenses. It began when DH was at university, before we met, and was the standard parents helping out a child at uni situation. DH always worked PT to top this up.

After leaving uni, DH wasn't able to get a job in his field and so has subsequently had to retrain, and is halfway through that process. This means he is earning low for now as he is studying whilst working so is essentially unskilled. In around 2 years, we hope he will be on a good salary. I am also on a relatively low wage.

We've been married since 2010, and since then they've given us £500 a month to help us out. Obviously, this is very generous and e appreciate this. SIL has had the same.

SIL no longer needs this, as her and her husband have now got high flying careers (lawyer and pilot) and no children, and do FIL has decided to stop all our payments.

We've just moved into a new home, and have a baby due in a few weeks. The timing could not be worse.

DH is so furious he wants to tell him we are cutting him out and never seeing him again. I don't know what to do - is he being selfish and awful? Or is it his money and we should be grateful for what we've had up until now?

OP posts:
Bagofnutsnbolts · 18/02/2014 23:23

That's it rinoachicken you are a genius and have solved the whole sorry tale of woe. Much more camilla in tone than the queen!

Rinoachicken · 18/02/2014 23:27

Grin do I get a prize?!

PrinceDoshaFrodaNigeria · 18/02/2014 23:29

Dear OP

I have read both your threads with great concern. I, like your husband, whome you must obey as is your place as a woman, am disgusted by the mistrust and sinisism of this nest of vipers.

You're bravery and courage and frankness and honesty leds me to offer to you (your husband) all that is within my power to give: a great fortune I am not otherwies able to get out of my country at presente.

To this end, you will please send me your banking account details.

Yours in the highest regards
Prince FrodaDosha of Nigeria

msmoss · 18/02/2014 23:32

It all started to go wrong for the OP in the first post when she implied that the rich FIL who gives £1,000 a month to his children is a tight arse.

Hopefully somewhere in all the great advice people have taken the time to give will relevant to the OP's actual situation and when it's all calmed down they'll be able to do something constructive about the mess they're in.

falulahthecat · 18/02/2014 23:38

PrinceDoshaFrodaNigeria

HAHAHAHA

You know, I once got one of those telling me their uncle was stuck on a Russian space station. Hmm

Bagofnutsnbolts · 18/02/2014 23:39

rino and prince I send you both Cake and Wine this is the best entertainment I've had in a seriously long time ... Wow my life must be really dull!

LessMissAbs · 18/02/2014 23:39

Figster I'm guessing Aberdeen it is über expensive to live due to oil industry house prices and rental are obscene!!

Nope, Aberdeen prices very similar to Edinburgh perhaps slightly higher for city centre rentals, and you could get a 4 bed house in Peterculter or Cults near good schools for what the OP is paying in rent. Likewise, £850 would definitely get you a 2 bedroom flat in the West End or Ferryhill, the best areas. Plenty of areas where you could get one for less.

PrinceDoshaFrodaNigeria · 18/02/2014 23:42

Falulahthecat Yes! That was my uncle! he is sadly died and i now have his fortune to dispurse as well. But not to you, you are clearly the lesbian man-hating synic who laughs at royalty men. I shall reseve my largez to OP.

Rinoachicken · 18/02/2014 23:43

bags my first ever MN Cake and Wine !! Grin

(Is it very pathetic that I'm chuffed to bits by that?!)

Bagofnutsnbolts · 18/02/2014 23:49

It's my first time on MN, so I'm learning the ropes, but your suggestion of balmoral had me doing the nose trick with my cup of tea. Hubby was fuming coz he was in firing line! That'll teach me to read MN whist drinking!

Bagofnutsnbolts · 18/02/2014 23:51

Should add I don't normally laugh that much that tea comes flooding out my nose! Just loved you comment!

francesdrake · 18/02/2014 23:51

Is it Monaco?

Rinoachicken · 18/02/2014 23:53
Grin
Bagofnutsnbolts · 18/02/2014 23:53

prince your priceless... So glad I'm not drinking tea or it'd be twice in one evening

Electryone · 18/02/2014 23:57

Prince Grin

Rinoachicken · 18/02/2014 23:57

I'm trying to BF, DS2 is not impressed that I keep laughing!

Bagofnutsnbolts · 19/02/2014 00:07

Oops sorry rino I can see that's tricky trying to Bf and laughing really is no laughing matter! Just realised I've high jacked this thread! And oh crap its gone midnight and I've got to be up early, so signing off now but hope to catch up again soon. And stop laughing or your poor baby will be doing the nose trick! Grin

Whaddafark · 19/02/2014 02:08

Farking bollocks. The whole thing.

Don't worry and waste your time people

fideline · 19/02/2014 04:29

"That or it's the Queen and DofE who have cut off Charles and Camilla?!"

Grin
HappyMummyOfOne · 19/02/2014 08:29

Sockreturningpixie, what a lovely sight to wake upto Grin

Still not sure why I got deleted as no email or PM from MN but suspect its because I dont believe the OP!

BadLad · 19/02/2014 08:30

Anyone care to link to the other thread?

WeAreDetective · 19/02/2014 08:33

here's the other thread

BadLad · 19/02/2014 08:49

Much obliged

Objection · 19/02/2014 09:10

Now that we've established that OP is in Edinburgh...
A quick RightMove search again:

Edinburgh - 201 2 bedroom flats under £1300pcm
177 2 bedroom flats under £1000pcm
140 2 bedroom flats under £800pcm
27 2 bedroom flats under £600pcm

fideline · 19/02/2014 09:20

Did someone say there is a moneysavingexpert thread too?