PIL Issue. Need some perspective.

[NameChangedForPILissue]

NC'd for obvious reasons.

PIL are very well off. Rich enough that MIL doesn't and has never worked. FIL earns a huge amount, and is unbelievably tight with it too (refuses to update 25 year old kitchen, 30 year old bathroom, won't buy MIL a new car even though hers is verging on dangerous, won't spend more than £10 per GC at christmas etc).

They are set to become millionaires with some inheritance that is probably due to come in the next year or two. For now they live on their £200k+ a year income with very little expenditure.

For the past 8 years, they have given us money every month to help with our living expenses. It began when DH was at university, before we met, and was the standard parents helping out a child at uni situation. DH always worked PT to top this up.

After leaving uni, DH wasn't able to get a job in his field and so has subsequently had to retrain, and is halfway through that process. This means he is earning low for now as he is studying whilst working so is essentially unskilled. In around 2 years, we hope he will be on a good salary. I am also on a relatively low wage.

We've been married since 2010, and since then they've given us £500 a month to help us out. Obviously, this is very generous and e appreciate this. SIL has had the same.

SIL no longer needs this, as her and her husband have now got high flying careers (lawyer and pilot) and no children, and do FIL has decided to stop all our payments.

We've just moved into a new home, and have a baby due in a few weeks. The timing could not be worse.

DH is so furious he wants to tell him we are cutting him out and never seeing him again. I don't know what to do - is he being selfish and awful? Or is it his money and we should be grateful for what we've had up until now?

Wouldn't you need a guarantor for a high rent on low income? Privately renting is as hard to obtain as a mortgage in my experience!

I honestly do not understand people who are so desperate to believe bullshit. Is there some kind of special magic feeling they get from being the minority who defend the hairy handed?

oh my goondess.... just read the other thread. How come all the glaring inconsistencies???

Nailing jelly to a wall would be simpler.

ah c'mon lifeisabox...lets face it if the OP can't RTFT and have the manners to answer people's questions why should everyone else?

I have read this one and the other thread, have seen A LOT of good advice and some pointed questions from Mntters, but from the OP mostly obfustcation and determination to play the hard done by victim because she is £500 down.

dammit..errant t in obfuscation

Oh anonymai, can't you see it's all just become a bit of fun from some daft post, was believable (vaguely) until her husband joined in, now its just gone over the flipping rainbow...!

My sympathy lies with the "abusive, controlling" Fil.

If he exists!

Wait, what, that wasn't really her husband posting?

Oh dear, I'm also now getting more of the opinion that the whole thread/threads are just some silly wind-up of MN. Nothing makes sense.

Omg I thought it had peaked, skim read ahead the realised I'd missed the crowing glory, the sweet corn in the turd if you will, that was a post from op's husband waving the 'what about the sisterhood' flag from his pregnant three-jobbed wife's side.

Awesome

I've had a chat with my DH about your situation thought a male's perspective on it would be interesting.

Here it is (not sure you're going to be a fan though Mr OP). Here goes:

WTAF is he doing letting his 8 month pregnant wife working 3 jobs. Just so he can train in something to not like that either! I don't work in my preferred choice of occupation but I'm happy not to because MY priorities are no longer relevant when I have a dependant.

And HOW DARE ANYONE be so ungrateful. To want to cut the umbilicus that has literally fed you because you were too darn idiotic to (sorry for sounding like JK) 'put something on the end of it' until you were qualified and had the means to support the size of your family.
The PIL have probably lied to you. They have just heard that you've signed up to move to an expensive flat and you're having another mouth to feed so you probably don't need the extra dosh, just good timing that you SIL doesn't need it either.

It also seems that in between some of the ladies on here being verbally and rationally irritated with the OP (and from what I gather if you post on here you shouldn't expect anything less) there has been some pretty solid advice. And the OP's reaction to that advice isn't gratitude but more defence, the OP doesn't seem to want to reduce the lifestyle or minimise trauma. And lastly, if I was your husband, I'd get a better paid management job (easily done with any kind of degree) and work nights and weekends to balance the books and to keep my HEAVILY preggers wife stress free and comfortable.

You're both a pair of douches. Him for letting his missus do all of that and her for allowing herself.

From DH of Atbeckandcall

Awesome post atbeckandcall's DH

Is that a real dh or another fictional one?

These two posts are like a parallel universe.

I am confused beyond words.

Oh bollox, is it a hairy hander?

Maybe the OP's husband should re-train as a shoe repairer.

OP' s DH, did you go over to moneysavingexpert to tell them off too?

Promise you that was my DH. Although he has told me if I spend so much reading and getting annoyed about a thread as stupid as this OPs, he going to confiscate my phone. And I had to translate it a bit. Too many effs and jeffs for me to type.

If this thread is real I don't think the OP is in the UK.

She's in Scotland

On the moon I reckon with her oh so sweet husband!

Atbeckandcall, RESPECT! Will you be my grandson ... er, grandaughter (I am an equal opportunities old hag)?

Seriously, as I said some posts back, I am thinking this whole thing is a gigantic wind-up ... all the obfuscation, changing of stories, refusal to contemplate any good MN advice, apparent total ignorance of basic mathematics (the moaning husband is studying some sort of ACCOUNTANCY stuff? Give me strength ...)

But IF it is genuine, both threads, then God help OP - and (perhaps I am in a minority of one here) I do have a LOT of sympathy for father-in-law, who probably became aghast at these two entitled people assuming the golden goose was going to continue chucking golden eggs at them in perpetuity. FIL had fininanced son's studies for years ... and still going in ... but meanwhile, son and wife move to a more expensive place, conceive a child. And - this I find really odd - wife takes out gym membership when very pregnant? And it's not clear if FIL has suddenly terminated the goodies, or is going to do so - another inconsistency.

So many odd aspects of this thread, plus the totally weird thing of not knowing the difference between a 'mortgage' and 'rent'. Oh please!

Like I said - I am very VERY suspicious about the whole thing. It could all be a huge wind-up.

They're in Scotland, Grunt.

or Fairyland