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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

See all MNHQ comments on this thread

to want to know if DogsBestFriend has been banned from mumsnet?

999 replies

GetOrf · 07/11/2011 19:43

Because if she has been I would like to know why.

OP posts:
mummynoseynora · 07/11/2011 20:47

can I just point out here Justine, that even though DBF could see the inconsistencies / lies from TLES she STILL offered to help save that dog! Surely thats enough of a reason not to ban her!

She saw the truth, called her on it, defended herself from being lied about and STILL tried to help the dog in that thread....

tbh I think you're bonkers having banned her and not TLES.... but I'll probably get banned for saying that

lisad123 · 07/11/2011 20:47

Wow this thread is growing too quick as I'm trying to read!!
That post was very emotive and in the end did get very nasty, which I said about.

The dog house is good fun but certainly can be a scarcy place at times, with a number of strong personalities.

AmazingBouncingFerret · 07/11/2011 20:48

Thank you Bella and simpson.

ItsonlymeMrsDB · 07/11/2011 20:48

simpson

I think it was also that she wouldn't accept any help or advice, either, and in the end, wouldn't defend herself. Just left the thread.

TeWihara · 07/11/2011 20:48

I think HQ have a point tbh. If DBF has had several warnings and refused to tone it down.

I think there's an argument that you would save more dogs, if you were kind and supportive to everyone, because they would be more willing to listen to your advice in the future. If you scare them off by going on about dead dogs (yes, I know how it works, and I know it's horrible, and I know people get involved without realising) then they probably aren't going to listen to anything you say because they think you're an extremist.

There have been plenty of "I want to get a kitten but I live in a flat and am 8 months pg" threads where the OP has been convinced it's not a good idea with half a dozen it's not a good idea because of X, Y, Z posts and no frothing.

Being a bit gentle pays off.

chickchickchicken · 07/11/2011 20:48

i support lifting the ban

SecretNutellaFix · 07/11/2011 20:48

Justine, so when exactly did telling the truth constitute a personal attack?

GrimmaTheNome · 07/11/2011 20:48

Simple question for MNHQ: does DBF do more good than harm?

I think you know what 99% of the people who've posted on this thread think.

faverolles · 07/11/2011 20:49

Please lift the ban. MN will be a poorer place without DBF. She is a fantastic poster. Sure she can be blunt, opinionated etc. But she has helped so many people and their dogs over the years.

To be fair to her, on the thread with the dead Dh, other posters were quicker to get in and criticise the OP iirc.

What a bloody shame for her to be banned over a barney with TLES of all posters!
TLES is the only poster on MN who I actively avoid, due to the emotional leechiness. Please don't let this be the deciding reason to issue a ban :(

Hulababy · 07/11/2011 20:49

Surely iyt is up to DBF to ask MNHQ for a lifting of the ban, along with assurances she will calm down a bit and use Mn in the spirit it should be used?

FWIW as someone who only comes on this section very briefly ( don't have a dog, but have had the need to look ata couple of threads of so for other reasons) - it is a scary place, it is often not welcoming at all to newcomers and not a place I would want to ask for advice on generally. Advice is given out in such an aggresive tone it isn't nice.

flatbread · 07/11/2011 20:49

noooooo don't let DBF go! I love reading her posts, even when I don't agree with her. She is refreshingly forthright and generally fun.

Hulababy · 07/11/2011 20:49

Not AIBU section, mean the dog section.

bumpybecky · 07/11/2011 20:49

this thread is so fast moving!

please bring back DBF. It's been mentioned already, but only last weekend she found a rescue place for a MNer's dog who was going to be put to sleep as the MNer hadn't managed to find a rescue place for it. That dog has been living with us for the last week and already has a likely home lined up - all down to DBF.

This is far from the first dog DBF has saved on MN.

Yes she is blunt, but then sometimes posters need to hear the truth, even if they don't like it.

Its been suggested before that there are stickies on the DH page with threads giving answers to commonly asked questions. Perhaps if one of those could give some of the advice that DBF and other experts regularly post it might help? I was thinking specifically what to look for when selecting a rescue animal / how to avoid backyard breeders / how to find a good no-kill rescue organisation etc)

Please reconsider the ban. MN needs people willing to speak the truth

CatherineOfArrogance · 07/11/2011 20:49

I was banned the other week (Bimbono5)
Ive never had any warning, unless they were of course invisible warnings. Care to explain that one Justine?

JustineMumsnet · 07/11/2011 20:50

@StewieGriffinsMom

Actually, Justine I know i emailed MNHQ several years back about TLES and MNHQ responded that they would investigate. I still remember what my concerns were so I can re-email them rather than posting on this thread.

Ok I've checked with the team and whilst there's some drama queenyness in there, there is nothing inconsistent.

SacreLao · 07/11/2011 20:50

justine That's not a personal attack, it's fact!

TLES was proven to be a liar.

GetOrf · 07/11/2011 20:50

Absolutely pissing myself at v a u n d a of pramscam.

It's like spooks.

Or the Twilight Zone Grin

OP posts:
BluddyMoFo · 07/11/2011 20:50

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

HeresTheThingBooyhoo · 07/11/2011 20:51

"How can "You are a liar, foolish and a disgrace, not just for what you are doing to this dog but for trying to discredit someone who works her arse off to save them. You appall me.." Not be classed as a personal attack . Fraid it's a personal attack in my book."

"You are a liar proven fact, foolish fact and a disgrace ok, opinion (unless you think TLES' behaviour WRT the dog was praiseworthy?), not just for what you are doing to this dog but for trying to discredit someone fact who works her arse off to save them. You appall me..fact" (she appalled me too)

NOT a personal attack.

ChippingInNeedsSleep · 07/11/2011 20:51

Yes I agree it would be if it was just this thread - but the lecturing and aggressive hectoring has gone on for some time, tbh. As said, the Doghouse is not exactly welcoming to posters who often are seeking help and practical advice, rather than a telling off. I do understand that many of us have strong feelings about the dogs, but a bit of compassion towards humans wouldn't go amiss. There was a poor woman a while back who got into trouble for not being able to cope with her dog after her dh died...

... yes, I felt for the woman too. However, she didn't give out half the details until later in the thread. Many of us posted the same as DBF did before the woman had said she was widowed (apparently she 'didn't want people being nice to her because of that and it wasn't relevant'). Why single DBF out??

DBF stands out more than most of us saying exactly the same thing because she spends the time doing so. Many of us feel the same, post the same things, but with less frequency. DBF does more good on here (for animals) than probably the rest of us put together. People need telling, not stroking, when they are being utterly stupid & selfish. I'm actually quite astounded at how patient she is. She is nowhere near as 'blunt' as she used to be. There was a thread last week where I was far blunter then DBF - I was expecting her to have a right go if she saw the thread - she didn't. What more do you want her to do?

She called TLES a liar - she isn't the first, she isn't wrong & she wont be the last.

Happy to consider lifting a ban obviously if loads of people think we should

Good, let's get that done then

but I do think the Doghouse has to change and I'm not sure if DBF can moderate her posting style - currently it's very anti the spirit of the site

'anti spirit of the site' Really? It's anti spirit of the site to make people see that animals have rights too and need our protection?? Really?

Justine - TLES cannot lie straight in bed. I think she's a somewhat troubled person, but that does not make her beyond reproach.

simpson · 07/11/2011 20:51

itsonlymemrsDB - yes exactly. She was offered help and refused/ignored it. Especially when people took the time to give her advice in the thread a few months ago about getting the dog in the first place.

And most people predicted it would go tits up unfortunately. Sad

squeakytoy · 07/11/2011 20:52

DBF is passionate about animals.. I have only ever seen her shouty and aggressive when she is upset about an animal that could be or has been mistreated or in danger.

I have seen her on many other threads, had a laugh with her, sometimes disagreed with her, but she has always been a poster I admire for being constant in her beliefs, and honest.

TLES on the other hand seems to live a life that is off a soap opera script, and treats us all to her every drama, and quite often I have wondered how it can possibly be true.

SacreLao · 07/11/2011 20:52

As to their being nothing inconsistent about TLES???

How about reading what DBF quoted on the thread she got banned on.

She said she got rid of a dog for biting, then claimed it wasn't her dog, then denied all knowledge of the dog and said it never existed.

How is that not inconsistent?

Plus she says she is getting rid of the dog for toileting in the house and then on another thread claims it is because of dog thieves?

CatherineOfArrogance · 07/11/2011 20:52

I dont care about myself tbh but your members have spoken regarding DBF, the way you disregard them is not on