Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Flip

1 2 3 4 5 6 ··· 10 11

Original poster

to really not get why people co-sleep?

267 replies

LaLaLaLayla · 23/10/2011 10:47

I really do not understand why people co-sleep. Apart from research telling us how dangerous it is for the baby, I also feel a bit sorry for the poor husbands who are almost invariably turfed out of the marital bed to make room for them.

What is the point? Is there one? Is anyone else as baffled as me by this?

OP posts:

trixymalixy · 23/10/2011 10:49

Out of necessity, to get a tiny bit of sleep in my case.

Some people like being all cuddled up to their children.

YABU

trixymalixy · 23/10/2011 10:50

Oh and my DH was not turfed out.

FabbyChic · 23/10/2011 10:50

I co-slept with my 18 year old until he was 2.5 from birth on the sofa, then the floor, because his dad slept in the bed and we were estranged.

squeakyfreakytoy · 23/10/2011 10:50

I dont understand it either. A cot by the side of the bed seems the much better option to me.

tryingtoleave · 23/10/2011 10:50

Because you get more rest.

Because it isn't more dangerous if the baby is sleeping in a bed, next to a mother who is bfing and not drunk or very overweight.

Sirzy · 23/10/2011 10:50

It's not for me. But as long as it is done safely then whatever works best for family should be done surely?

mollycuddles · 23/10/2011 10:51

Because it makes bf easier IME. Because there's nothing more gorgeous than my sleeping children. Because it isn't dangerous. Because we have a big enough bed so dh has never been turfed out. Because he wants to too. Because I want to. Ffs what does it have to do with you?

Purplebuns · 23/10/2011 10:51

Your baby is more likely to die as a stillbirth, than cosleeping and the risks are very low if the baby is bf and you don't drink or smoke. My DH was also in the bed when we co-slept and it enabled us to get much needed sleep. Nice to know you have researched the subject

tryingtoleave · 23/10/2011 10:52

My husband wasn't turfed out either.

If the baby is in a cot next to the bed you would still have to get up to feed them.

PosiesOfPoison · 23/10/2011 10:52

Of course you don't get it unless you've had a baby that won't settle, who has reflux with young children who also require your attnetion and if you didn't co sleep you wouldn't sleep at all!!!!

Conkertree · 23/10/2011 10:52

We co-sleep after ds3 wakes in the night for the first time (usually at 2 or 3 am) cause otherwise I would be permanently knackered - cant sleep in the day when the baby sleeps if you have other dc.

Dh has only ever slept in another bed if ds1 or 2 has needed company eg after a bad dream. Mind you we have a super king size so that helps.

ragged · 23/10/2011 10:53

Gonna kick off...
Coz I get much (I mean hugely much, many hours difference) more & better sleep, OP. Still sleep deprived, but not as insanity-inducing as things would be if I hadn't co-slept.

TheBestWitch · 23/10/2011 10:54

I wouldn't co-sleep with a newborn cos I would be too scared of rolling on them so I'd be too anxious to get any sleep. 4yo gets in with us now though. She doesn't disturb our sleep so I don't mind.

BerryLellow · 23/10/2011 10:54

You're being U if you don't want to 'get it', but not if you are looking to understand people's reasons. But from the tone of your OP, it seems like you are being a leetle bit sneery with an undertone of 'I know what's best for EVERYONE'. Perhaps that's just a misreading though.

rainbowinthesky · 23/10/2011 10:54

We have always had a superkingsize bed so can easily fit everyone on.
If done properly, it's not unsafe. Also makes bf a lot easier.

"marital bed" - shudder "poor husbands" shudder. Personally I really do not understand why people use these words...

tryingtoleave · 23/10/2011 10:55

Yup, no way I would have survived with a toddler who had stopped napping and a baby if I didn't cosleep.

Forrestgump · 23/10/2011 10:55

It isn't for us, we like our bed for us! (dh &me)

Most co sleepers I know do it out of laziness.

Dh had nightmares when we had our first that he had rolled on the baby and suffocated him, he woke terrified.

So if i had gone down that road, I would end up with either a non sleeping dh, or sleeping on my own, and that isn't what I want in our marriage.

TheHalloweenqueen · 23/10/2011 10:56

Go away and read more about it so you don't sound so ignorant then I might be arsed to respond properly to your post.

GreenEyesandNiceHam · 23/10/2011 10:56

Because they want to and it works for them.

Anymore questions you're struggling with at all?

Original poster

LaLaLaLayla · 23/10/2011 10:56

I guess I am looking to understand, BerryLellow. I have researched it and it is recommended to keep your baby in your room, but not in your bed. If you co-sleep, then presumably you can never have a drink. And what do you do if you are ill?

OP posts:

LynetteScavo · 23/10/2011 10:56

Because it's lovely.

DS2 slept on top of me, until my bump with DD was just too big. So much easier than getting up in the night to go to him room to reassure him. When DD was born he just accepted there wasn't room for everybody, and happily slept in his own bed all night.

DH certainly wasn't turfed out.

rainbowinthesky · 23/10/2011 10:57

What's wrong with laziness?

Purplebuns · 23/10/2011 10:57

Laziness, wow.

FabbyChic · 23/10/2011 10:57

I never breastfed at all.

tryingtoleave · 23/10/2011 10:57

A little baby should not be sleeping next to a father, anyway. We always slept dh, me, baby, toddler rail on end of bed.

Flip

1 2 3 4 5 6 ··· 10 11