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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to be irritated by sil getting pissed while still bf her dd.

164 replies

mrszimmerman · 26/09/2011 11:14

I mean she must have had 3 or 4 units, she was starting to really raise her voice and look lairy.

(btw she's awful when she's had a few)
But she did then give dd a forumla bottle and probably went 8 hours before feeding her. But still. It seems a little incautious to me.
BUT no offence to the bf drinkers, the research is not hugely clear about this is it?

OP posts:
Paschaelina · 26/09/2011 11:16

I don't think 3 or 4 units its going to do very much at all to the breastmilk.

Original poster
mrszimmerman · 26/09/2011 11:19

You know that it won't?
I only ask because I think that the research is still fairly inconclusive, ie it probably varies quite a lot from woman to woman.
Also what we do know is that drinking, ipso facto, leads in inaccurate reporting of intake of drinking ! Grin
Every study ever done about drinking tends to show that people drink a good bit more than they declare.

OP posts:
Seona1973 · 26/09/2011 11:21

3 or 4 units isnt much (a couple of large glasses of wine maybe) and she didnt bf for hours afterwards. You can still have a drink while bf and the alcohol leaves the milk at the same rate it leaves the blood and doesnt concentrate in the milk. I think you are being a bit judgy really (and I didnt bf!)

kellymom.com/health/lifestyle/alcohol.html

piprabbit · 26/09/2011 11:21

As a one-off, it is absolutely none of your business at all.

bintofbohemia · 26/09/2011 11:22

YABU.

Ciske · 26/09/2011 11:23

From the NHS website:

"Alcohol clears from the mother's blood at a rate of about one unit every two hours. If you do decide to have a drink, it's a good idea to wait for a couple of hours before breastfeeding. It can be difficult to predict when your baby may want to feed, so some mothers plan ahead and express milk beforehand for special occasions where they may want to have a drink."

If she had 4 units that makes 4 x 2 = 8 hours to wait before BFing.

MainlyMaynie · 26/09/2011 11:23

If she then waited 8 hours before feeding her, what's the problem? That's what we were advised to do at the breastfeeding course I went on.

The research is inconclusive, but seems to lean towards it isn't too much of an issue, perhaps your SIL has read it and decided that.

belgo · 26/09/2011 11:23

so she didn't actually bf her after drinking 3 or 4 units? She gave her a bottle and then didn't bf the baby for eight hours or so?

What exactly is it you are worried about?

NoMoreWasabi · 26/09/2011 11:24

It has nothing to do with you.

kirsty75005 · 26/09/2011 11:25

I thought that alcohol left the bloodstream at rate of 1 unit an hour, so 8 hours later she would have had no alcohol in her bloodstream anyway ?

vigglewiggle · 26/09/2011 11:25

You don't like her when she's drunk, that doesn't make her a bad mother!

It was your observation that she had 3-4 units, so I presume that is accurate. If your point is correct about under-reporting in studies concerning alcohol and breastfeeding (and FWIW I suspect it is) then she could have safely had a couple more!

MarginallyNarkyPuffin · 26/09/2011 11:25

Yes. YABU. And ignorant. And judgemental.

LoopyLoopsPussInBoots · 26/09/2011 11:25

You sound mental. Keep your nose out.

BeyondTheLimitsOfAcceptability · 26/09/2011 11:26

YABU. But I'm a "breastfeeding drinker" so I'm probably biased.

(realise that makes me sound like an alcoholic!)

Original poster
mrszimmerman · 26/09/2011 11:26

well that's fine.

I just think it's not great sacrifice to stop while you're bf.

It seems an odd right to be defensive of. Why take the risk?
And no one is actually addressing the fact that once you have four units your sense of responsibilty is markedly reduced which is why we don't drive when pissed isn't it?
Just interested to hear, maybe it's fine, it just seems odd and not something I would have been comfortable with for myself.
And this is an open forum, of course it isn't officially 'my business', i was just curious to know what other bfers thought. I think it's incautious is all - so sue me!

OP posts:
stomping · 26/09/2011 11:27

YABU. Even if she bf straight away the baby would only get a tiny amount and she didn't, she waited 8 hours.

WoTmania · 26/09/2011 11:27

YABU -

worraliberty · 26/09/2011 11:28

YABU, she waited 8hrs

She's entitled to enjoy herself, or would you prefer she was just a baby making and feeding machine?

BeyondTheLimitsOfAcceptability · 26/09/2011 11:29

I had a few drinks when pregnant too. So sue me.

theowlwhowasafraidofthedark · 26/09/2011 11:29

YABU - you sound like a very dull martyr type of person.

belgo · 26/09/2011 11:29

If she wasn't bfing at all, would you still be irritated by her drinking?

TBH I think it's probably more dangerous to make up a bottle of formula after a few units, then it is to bf.

stomping · 26/09/2011 11:29

I'm not a drinker but I have spent 36 months pregnant and about 7 years bf and tbh, I think for a drinker to not be able to drink a couple of glasses of wine for that length of time is quite a sacrifice.

TattyDevine · 26/09/2011 11:30

I think there are plenty of things she could do that are much worse. YABU to be irritated by it.

pommedechocolat · 26/09/2011 11:31

YABU. You sound a whole lot of fun OP.

MarginallyNarkyPuffin · 26/09/2011 11:31

What's driving got to do with it Confused