Back to the start...

[pinkclouds26]

I have been on and off alcohol for the past couple of years. It has got to a point where I drink too often and at times too much. It is not worth the anxiety, broken sleep, the money, the arguments with dp...

I have learned the hard way the moderation doesn't work for me, the longest I went off alcohol was 6 months and I actually felt amazing. The minute I decided to have a few, I was back to square one, I have had numerous false starts since then, but always found an excuse to have a drink again, a holiday, a party etc. It wasn't easy being alcohol free, but it was so worth it. It is time to start again. I really wish I wasn't back to the start but I suppose I do have a lot more knowledge behind me this time

Anyone any tips for getting through the first few days?

I went back to drinking after a couple of years alcohol free OP. I'm drinking a bottle of wine a week currently but, like you, moderation doesn't work for me. Mainly because I'm back to counting the days until I can drink and so alcohol is constantly on my mind. Plus I just don't feel good whereas I did when alcohol free.

I'm going to stop. And will count today as my first alcohol free day. I will keep myself active. And ifnecessaryy over the next week I will eat some sweeties and rubbish as something to look forward to rather than the wine.

What i found useful when I gave up before was reading online diary type stuff : the good effects of being alcohol free for a week. Then 2 weeks , then 3 weeks and so on. Seeing how not drinking benefits me as the days add up really encourages me.

Well done you for making your mind up to stop. Best wishes.

I came here this morning for the exact same reason and with a similar story. When I'm off alcohol I feel great and like I'm 100% happy to never drink again. I think I need better long term strategies. There first few days I find reading a good quit book (by women writers) is helpful, there are lots on Amazon if you have a kindle. I think I'll do that again this time and start again. Good luck you guys.

I'd love to join you, I keep trying and failing, so disappointed in myself and so worried about what I'm doing to my health 😔.

I’m on day one too! So many reasons to stop. I don’t know why I can’t just do it.

How is everyone getting on? Day 1 for me again here. I had a good stint off alcohol early in the year and felt great. Then fell back into drinking in May and I have drank far too much the whole summer. My anxiety is through the roof. I need to get myself back into a good routine for the kids starting back to school and I have a really busy few months ahead with work. I actually listened to some of The Sober Diaries on my commute home tonight, so will keep going with that. Hoping posting here will make me accountable.

Hello. Day two here. Trying to be accountable too by posting. I listened to a podcast too! Have not drunk today, I’ll be so pleased about that when I wake up tomorrow

@pinkclouds26 @Manyanamanyana @Onlymeandyou hope you guys are still with us!

Oh thank-you for checking in! I did 2 days which were quite good but I felt wobbly, and last night DS birthday, had a few glasses. Am disappointed of course. Day 1 again. I'm so glad you reached out @Poopgoestheweasel , I need to do this once and for all. Have a few nights out this weekend and the plan is not to drink, but at this stage I'm struggling to trust myself. I will post again tomorrow to be accountable. I am also worried about my health.

@confusedlots @Manyanamanyana I need to make a change, I’m risking everything when I drink. Here for you if you need a pal in the same boat.

I'm in @Poopgoestheweasel , this is a change I have to make once and for all to live my life in a way that makes me feel proud xx

Great to wake up sober. Had some crazy dreams. My cravings come around 4-6pm. I just need to power through that period. @Manyanamanyana PM me if this thread might just be us!

Oh great job, I do love waking up after not drinking, the self talk is so different to this other mornings huh? Also had crazy dreams the last few sober nights, lots about trying to get somewhere and having to do endless things before I could go, can't really remember them though now. Yes those times, that is the danger zone. Looking forward to a good night sleep tonight and waking up please with myself. Id be happy to DM you if we think that @confusedlots and @Onlymeandyou are not coming back, maybe we give them a few days? Also @Incredulousaboutlife and @pinkclouds26 - we love to see you back ❤️

Yes I’m still here! Feeling a lot better today after not drinking last night, and hoping I can keep this up for a sustained period of time. Had some
weird dreams last night. Listened to some more of The Sober Diaries on my way to work this morning, so any other recommendations of audiobooks or podcasts would be very welcome.

Hey, just wanted to say I'm sober for 3.5 years now - if I can do it you can do it!

Thanks @Loloblue - appreciate hearing that!

So I’m 43, from Yorkshire and have two youngish kids. My problem is having a swig of spirits to chill out around 5/6pm then going back for more swigs. I’m a secret binge drinker.

AA gave me my life back. No way could I have white knuckled it.

so sorry for not checking in, day 5 here and feel great, very positive! had a few great nights sleep and working on my goals and looking back on bits and pieces I wrote when I was last sober to help put me along, I will read back properly after work and catch up, so happy there are others joining me, it will help so much 😀

I have my sisters wedding on Wednesday, I was originally going to start after that but then I realised there is always an excuse, I have a city break booked in October, I would then want to push it out until after that...
I know people at the wedding will call me boring and have a lot to say but I am putting myself and my children first, my daughter is 14 and she definitely has made a few comments about my drinking, nothing major but I can tell it irritates her and that alone is probably my biggest reason to stop although there are many.

My 2 boys seem oblivious, but they are younger.

Myself and dp have stupid arguments after drink, never anything major and not in front of the children but it causes anxiety and tension.

My health is another reason, I have started to have niggles and convinced myself its my liver!

Financially we spend a ridiculous amount on alcohol, now no one ever goes without, but we could spend it more wisely.

My anxiety is through the roof!

My sleep is awful when I drink.

I feel my memory is affected and that is a bit scary.

I am worried other people can tell, I only drink at night bar holidays or special occasions and ensure I am ok to drive the next day but I am worried it will be on my breath or that people can tell through text messages etc.

That feeling of waking up and checking my phone to see if I sent any embarrassing messages, I won't miss that!

The freedom to be able to drive at night if there was an emergency rather than rely on a taxi or dp.

Dp also drinks too much, but maybe not to the same extent, they are giving up too, but I need to ensure my sobriety does not depend on his.

Sorry that might sound like a ramble, but I am trying to get my thoughts down so I can look back, does anyone else relate?

I feel the city break might be a test, I am strangely not feeling too bad about the wedding.

@Loloblue and @HumptyDump I love hearing success stories, I am in sober tiktok constantly the oast few days we'll done. I got to 6 months the last time, got through Christmas a one night trip, nights out, birthdays but we went on a city break I decided I could moderate and it quickly went downhill, its actually scary how quick I went back to my old ways! I aged a few short stints since but I know I need to make this permanent.

@Incredulousaboutlife and @Onlymeandyou hope you are doing good x

@Manyanamanyana its amazing waking up after not drinking, a good quote I love is you will never wake up and regret not having a drink the night before! glad you are in too.

@Poopgoestheweasel I am definitely in and am going to try to commit to posting every day, the irony is if I was drinking I would be all 9ver this thread everyo e would be sick of me lol. I find I need to keep reminding myself of why I am doing it in the early days, as hard and cringey it may be I need to sit with those feelings, it can be so easy to look at the 'great memories' through Rose tinted glasses.

@confusedlots glad all is going well. I plan on reading Allen Cars easy way to stop drinking and Alcohol explained again I found them great before. I also read the sober diaries and Annie grace, not sure I really found either great but they were interesting in their own ways.

Hope I didn't miss anyone I will look back again but thanks so much for the support and hopefully we can all help each other xxx I will do my best to come on every day and check in!

I've not had a drink since I posted but I've found today a struggle. I had a lot of social interaction and it made me ott hyper and I would have loved to numb my mind with a bottle of wine. However I've got through the day with the help of eating a lot of rubbish and keeping busy.

I've got another couple of stressful days - for me- coming up: Workmen in the house tomorrow and a trip into the city on Saturday. Both of these are really really difficult because of my social anxiety. So trying not to think about them. Trying to take it a day at a time.

Best wishes to all.

@pinkclouds26thansks, I think I’ll try the Allen Carr book. I used to smoke socially, then I was smoking more and more and I knew it was something that DH hated so I decided to give up before our wedding day and the Allen Carr book was fantastic and really removed any desire to smoke again. Not sure why I haven’t read his books on alcohol.

Feeling a bit wobbly tonight, partly because kids and in bed and DH is outside doing some work and that’s usually my queue for sitting down with a drink where no one can see how much I’m pouring. I’ve been exhausted today though, so drinking is clearly only going to make that a million times worse. I know I just need to distract myself for 20 minutes and then I will hopefully have forgotten about it 🤞

Good luck @confusedlots . I did the distraction thing earlier. The craving wasn’t too bad, pretty sure it’ll get me hard tomorrow or Saturday night. Prime drinking times! Feel very pleased to be on my day 3.

@Poopgoestheweaselthank you! I am safely into bed now, no alcoholic drinks consumed, a small win. I am sure I’ll feel better for it in the morning. Well done on Day 3, let’s try and get through the weekend together.

Good morning from sunny Australia, so nice to wake up after no drinks! I have a birthday dinner tonight and a birthday party tomorrow night (unusual amount of social activity for me in 1 weekend! - also not my birthday) and the plan is not drinking. I'm so glad to hear from you all, and a special thanks to @Poopgoestheweasel for pulling me back in to this chat I can tell this is going to be a great support group. Hope you got through your wobbles @pinkclouds26 and @confusedlots , sometimes a shower and washing my hair is enough to get through that, but I do need to be vigilant I think, I typically go through a stage where I feel invincible and then cave in one night without any warning and am back in the hole. I also have kids and am worried about what they see. I need to get back into an exercise thing too, get those endorphins flowing! Have a great day all, and stay strong. Thanks for being here! Day 2 (again, but hopefully last day 2) ❤️