Is finishing inside someone without asking normal if no condom was used?

[Sendingpositivehubsprayers]

Date a week ago came inside me without asking. Is this just normal since we weren’t using protection so ‘anything goes’ type thing.

Before anyone has a go at me, it’s my first time doing this (unprotected sex with someone new). Date went well, we booked a last minute hotel after it and he did actually say ‘by the way, I don’t have any condoms’. I shrugged and then he completely dropped the subject of contraception. Didn’t ask me if I was on the pill etc

Had great sex and he finished twice over the evening/morning. Both times inside me.

The first time he didn’t actually say he was about to. The second time it looked like he was about to and I said ‘tell me when you are’ and he told me as he was doing it. Too much info but the second time around was asked from a sensual erm point of view. Not so I could get off him in time

Given that any unprotected sex can cause STI, and pregnancy, why if so would he need to ask or tell me he’s going to finish inside me?

Or is it just a case of you already agreed to the no condom thing?

Really like him. He’s on holiday for two weeks now but seeing each other when back etc

So feel a bit confused as I’ve read something on another thread on a different website that spoke about something similar and views seem to be it’s not okay

So are you or aren't you on contraception?

Regardless of pregnancy risk, I'd be more concerned about STI risk. It's irresponsible of you both really.

When I was dating, I had a coil but I still checked my date had protection once we were back at his and getting hot n heavy. (I'd met him numerous time's by then and felt safe, in terms of being at his place)
There was no way we were having intercourse until we'd ascertained we were both disease free and responsible.

Maybe in future, carry condoms.
Latex free because of allergies, standard and XL..covers all bases.
If they're half decent, they'll have their own anyway!

What a pointless post

In this day and age I'm actually surprised to read that OP. Seriously dude?

Do you think you can't catch an STD or get pregnant if a man doesn't ejaculate?

Exactly. Now it's becoming more clear why so many women on here are horified, amazed, devastated when they get pregnant after sex.

No judgment but please look after yourself better. Even nice guys you have good sex with can infect you with a STI. Have you got yourself a morning after pill?

Given the last post by the OP , I'm inclined to think she's deliberately trying to get pregnant or toying with us

This.
But also, this is why some women fall pregnant.. because they don't really pulling out doesn't really work (especially if he's super excited, has leaked a bit, or the womans in her fertile part of cycle)

This is how babies and STDs are made 🤣

You are coming across as increasingly strange. I mean 'Plot twist HIV!' is not so hilarious, is it? Or 'Plot twist HPV!' Which something like three quarters of sexually active people contract at some point in their lives, and which is usually not serious, but can cause cervical cancer?

Whether or not he thought you were on contraception is not what you should be thinking about, but your own weird passivity about consent and your health.

They're really not.

I've had to reprimand a few friends about unprotected sex. They think sti's won't happen to them. Then they do.

If you had no problem with him finishing inside you @Sendingpositivehubsprayers before you read you "should" have a problem, i think that's all ok.

But you really need to be serious about STI's in any new relationship.

personally i think something should have been said when the question of the hotel came up. something like, yes i am fine with a hotel but you need to get condoms.
then he could have got some from a vending machine/late night store/supermarket

How old are you? Have you not been given the safe sex talk?!
I assume you're happy to get a STD or become pregnant by someone you've known less than some food products in people's fridges.
Grow up, get checked out and make wiser choices in future.

I don’t actually understand what you’re after, here.

What's the worst thing that could happen?

The only way a woman can mislead a man into thinking she’s on contraception is if she tells him she is when she isn’t. Anything else is assumption. But I agree with others who’ve pointed out that this whole scenario is a binfire. If people can’t communicate openly about contraception then that’s a damn good sign they’re not ready to have sex with each other, much less deal with any potential fallout together.

The short and curly answer is no, no I wouldn't why would you risk yourself with possible STI/hpv and pregnancy?, I thought woman these days were more savvy to this. Look no judgement or trying not too we've all or most have done a one night stand but for me communicating before hand is essential, just think to yourself next time "no condom?" Owell another time then, just don't risk it, even with a one night stand if said person didn't have protection it was a no go, get yourself checked also.

Why does it matter what "other people would do"? Jeez!

"We need to get condoms".

It's 2026 afterall.

Take responsibility for your sexual health and fertility and buy some condoms.

You just shrugged when he said he didn't have condoms, why the fuck didn't you say let's get some now or no sex?

It’s normal.
I’m unsure whether this thread should have been moved to the ‘Sex’ topic, or is better left where it is for the benefit of people who need the advice given .

And what does a shrug mean?

You’re both idiots.

that said I don’t think you’d ever ask if it was ok? Surely the expectation since you’ve both been honest beforehand is that you’re both happy to risk STIs and pregnancy.

like I said, both idiots.

You had unprotected sex with a man you just met and your question is should he ask before he finishes, the point of that discussion is before you have sex, like he tried to do about protection.

You don’t know what it means to shrug? It’s a gesture to mean your raise and Lower your shoulders fo show you don’t care.

he did actually say ‘by the way, I don’t have any condoms’. I shrugged and then he completely dropped the subject of contraception. Didn’t ask me if I was on the pill etc

You shrugged. So he thought you were fine with none.

Presumably you chose not to say ok, no condoms no sex.
Or- I'll buy some.

This is not about what is 'normal'. It's about looking after your health and not getting pregnant.

If this is a holiday fling- or any other type of sex with an unknown man- get tested and use the MAP too if you aren't using the Pill.

Are you really this casual about contracting STIs? Potentially incurable ones?

Or did you both get tested, and have seen each other's results before deciding not to use condoms? Because I'd assume if you were responsible enough to discuss sexual health, you'd also be discussing pregnancy.

I can't decide whether you're both really young (but aren't teenagers fully clued up on sexual health these days?), or just really really stupid.