Aggressive Mumsnetters

[Idontpostmuch]

I've noticed that some boards are so much friendlier than others. What are the more hostile ones you've come across?

That dress if frumpy is an opinion and not an insult though. There should really be a space for people to say what they think about clothes.

😂

😂

Thanks for making me laugh 😂

But frumpy is completely meaningless as a term. Don’t like the colour, don’t like the style, has too many ruffles, not flattering to your figure - those are opinions.

Frumpy seems to be entirely used for clothes that some older women may wear. It is both ageist and misogynistic and absolutely used as an insult.

There are some of the most dehumanising comments about trans people I’ve ever read anywhere on that board. Don’t pretend it’s not a hateful space.

It's the opposite - they seem quite obsessed, especially with William and Catherine who can do no wrong and extremely anti Harry and Meghan. They post as if they know them and their lives personally.
It's quite bonkers and I no longer read it.

Gwenhwyfar proving the point of the thread. Women want suggestions of what to wear not to be told they look bad.

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😂

I’ve used MN for 20 years now and it’s always been lively, but there is a qualitative difference now. Some posters see any vulnerability as an opportunity for sport, which hasn’t always been the case.

In fairness I don’t think it’s a Mumsnet problem; social media does weird things to people’s perception, and I suspect something like 5% of humans are driven completely mad by it (unhinged aggression, conspiratorial bollocks, monomania). Sadly they are the same people who won’t ever fucking log off.

I could've guessed the feminism board would get shit on - women being blunt and not giving ground is a cardinal sin. Yes, conversation on there is robust and doesn't pull punches, but it's been that way for over a decade (how long I've lurked) and I don't think it's aggressive. Just not simpering and people-pleasing.

Otherwise, I think AIBU is the obvious 'aggressive' board. Personally, I don't have an issue with forceful posts though, as long as the poster is posting in good faith. It's easy enough to ignore, report, or indulge in a little back and forth.

Not a board per se but I'm noticing quite a few hard of reading people who post an opinion, which someone then agrees with/backs them up. But for some reason they read it as being the opposite, fully rip into said poster and then just toddler off without apologising.

OP: I think the sky is blue.
MN: Its a lovely colour, just like the sea.
OP: OMG are you a fucking simpleton or what. Nobody here is impressed or amused by you. And you've just embarrassed yourself with your ridiculous views.
600 posts later pointing out OPs mistake.
OP: Radio silence.

Love that FWR gets mentioned. The truth hurts for some people, those that can’t accept it that is.

It’s like going on to a forum about the earth, stating it’s flat and getting annoyed and calling folk bigots when your ridiculous statement gets blown apart with reason, scientific fact and plain common sense. Of course there’s no nuance, you can’t change sex. Women have the right to single SEX spaces. Get over it.

Trans people exist (despite the foot stomping protesting that FWR are calling for trans genocide when posters won’t go along with the Emperor’s New Clothes). As do anorexic people, they aren’t fat though.

Have just been on a nightshift and was looking at one of the RF threads about H&M and the viscous comments were shocking and the kind of talk you might hear from 14-15 year olds! Absolutely unhinged and quite creepy TBH . All the same usernames ,almost like a cult !

Increasing nastiness seems to be a thing generally. Congrats on your newborn, and hope bf went/is going well. My mum had me after a 9 yr gap and my oldest sister is almost 13 yrs older than me.

Last Xmas I started a thread without realising I was posting on AIBU. Intended to be lighthearted. A lot of nice responses but some terribly judgemental and not actually much to do with what I'd said. Then I realised it was being voted on. So, yes, AIBU just gives some people an excuse to be as horrible as possible.

Feminism is about women and if people can't see that......
I have noticed that people who think one can change sex can be the most aggressive!!
Saying posters are rabid, unhinged and other colourful insults are not in the spirit of the boards in general let alone on a board for women ostensibly to support each other!
Stating that men as a sex are offenders of violent crimes (against men and women) is not hate speech- it is borne out by statistics.
There have been some pretty nasty comments on this thread too.

I really haven't. Your "point" in fact can never be proved, because it is a lie.

You however clearly have proved mine, which is that you do expect to get to tell unchallenged lies and will cry victim when called out about it.

I'm not crying victim. I actually feel sorry for you all due to the extent it's taken over your lives. It's an illness.

Knowing there are two sexes is not an 'illness'.

This is you projecting your own issues I'm afraid. Have you considered getting help?

After all, if you take a step back, you will have to admit the supposed obsessives weren't the ones jumping in to slag others off, were they? The women from FWR are only posting on this thread to defend ourselves against lies like the ones you expect to get to post unchallenged.

I suppose it’s down to whether the topic under discussion is serious (eg advice on what to do after discovering a partner is cheating) or not (eg recommendations for a new mascara).

People are calling out the feminism board. As a woman, feminist topics are pretty serious in my view and I can understand a woman getting exercised about them and more so if a scoldy man tells her what to think.

As regards charges of “trans hate”, you can be a sex realist and wish trans people well at the same time. I think the stonewall refrain of “no discussion” harmed everyone because it taught TRAs to shout down any question or consideration that did entirely align with their views rather than speak with people who have different views and maybe even get some of them on board. More bees with honey etc. Of course it’s going to get people’s backs up if you shout at them for not adopting dogmatically a position that is at odds with what their eyes and ears tell them; and of course a lot of them will shout back,

Yes, totally bonkers. On the H and M thread anyone who said anything even remotely moderate about them was crucified. On another thread I asked an innocent question and was met by a flurry of posters all ranting about my ignorance and saying education system had to be improved. I left them to it but the posts kept flooding in.

Well 'inciteful' could be read two ways! I suspect that you meant insight rather than incite, although both are equally found all over Mumsnet.🙂

I've got to be honest and agree with other pp's who avoid the feminism boards, I've had my head bitten off once too often on there, and Royals is baffling to me.

Other places where a bunfight often ensues - threads about dogs (particularly of the under-trained variety), and anything which mentions criticism of the teaching profession. Oh, and anyone who allows their cat to have kittens will come in for a lashing as well.