I have to do a horrible thing tonight and I’m not sure I can do it (trigger warning r*pe)

[NotSureICanDoIt]

Something awful happened at the weekend, a ‘friend’ raped me, and tonight I have to go and do a video interview. I’m just not sure that I can go through with it. Even thinking about it makes me shake. I’ve done the forensics bit at the weekend, this is just the interview instead of making a statement.

Not sure what I’m posting for really. Has anyone else done one of these before? What if they don’t believe me?

Well done . I hope you are being well supported and that justice is served.

Hi OP, just seen this thread and wanted to post to say how amazing and strong you are. Thank you for going through with this as it potentially prevents awful things like this happening again.

You are an awesome, strong woman and what you’ve been able to do today will make the world a safer and better place for your DD and the rest of us.

Sending love. You’re brave and strong. Everyone on here is supporting you so this is a safe space.

Sorry you had to experience this vile act by a sick bastard. ♥️♥️♥️

Well done, proud of you

Proud of you @NotSureICanDoIt

you did it. Well done

I'm so proud of you. I'm really sorry you went through this and I hope you get justice.

I’m so proud of you my love 🤍 I know this must have been excruciatingly hard for you but you have been so brave 🧡 I was there when my daughter had to have her examination and then her recorded interview and the eventual trial, she was just 16 at the time and the bravery she had to put forth to do that had me looking her in utter awe . So I just know what that must have taken for you to do ! So from a stranger on the internet I just wanted to send some love and let you know how brave you are and say how proud of you I am I hope you are doing as okay as you can be 🧡.

Well done you warrior!!!

So so proud of you xx

You're amazing xx

I echo what Captivating has said.

NotSureICanDoIt - I am so sorry this has happened, it is awful. x

I didn't report my rape, it's one of the few regrets I have. Well done for being strong and no matter what happens, we believe you and support you. You are amazing.

I’m so sorry you went through what you did, OP. Well done for being strong and going through the video interview. You’re amazing.

I hope you have real life support. ❤️

Again - so so grateful for everyone that’s taken the time to comment. I truly, truly appreciate it.

I know he was arrested quickly.
I know he was in custody most of the day and was interviewed.
I know he went home and told people (heard it from a mutual friend) that he was NFA’d and that I hadn’t even been on his boat…..!

mutual friend has since blocked me on fb. Which is fine.

One thing I’m worried about is whether they will have searched the boat for evidence - specifically that I was there. He pulled my hair so hard that one of my hair extensions came out - would they have found it? Would they even have looked at the boat? The person in charge of the investigation couldn’t tell me.

Thank you so much for coming back, OP, and well done! I'm relieved the police interviewer treated you as she should.

I hope they did search the boat, that would be very helpful

I am sending you lots of love.

i was raped by a ‘friend’ when I was 19 at uni, it was horrific but I never did anything about it, it was an awful time and I wish I had the courage to report him but I was so young and didn’t have the right support.

i heard from friends years later he had done it other times and I’m sure he went on to SA other women if his past is anything to go by.

If I could go back I would report him for closure and also to stop it happening to anyone else.

anyway for what it’s worth your 100% doing the don’t thing and I think your amazing I hope it wasn’t too horrendous for you, give yourself lots of time because it’s a very harrowing experience

15 years later and I still think about what happened to me I think it’s a lot more common than we are led to believe

Right thing

Sometimes having a stranger present for support is better... can you ask police if theres a charity that does this in your area?
When i had to go to the abuse clinic I had a womens aid support worker

Hi I was sexually assaulted 12 years ago. The police stripped the perpetrators house from top
To bottom and didn’t allow him back in until it was done so hopefully the same was done on the boat. I’m extremely sorry that this happened to you. I hope you’re being kind to yourself and doing something you love each day to help you get through this horrible time 💜

I’m so sorry that happened to you. I do empathise.

It’s good to hear the police were thorough. Hopefully they’ll do the same with the boat. My hair extension will be there, as will my dna on the glass I was drinking from. Just hope he didn’t get a chance to get rid of any evidence.

I just bought this bracelet -

Hello, OP.

I couldn’t just read and not comment - I think you are just incredible. I know you probably don’t feel it right now, but you are. Your bravery has honestly got me in tears.

He sounds absolutely foul, what a disgusting, small man he is.

Please keep coming back to let us know how you are - I’ll be thinking of you lots and will always be here if you ever need to just offload.

It will all pass, I’m just sorry you had to go through it in the first place 💐

Hope you managed to get some sleep OP.

Reading your posts here, OP, I admire you so much. Your bravery has made me a bit tearful. Keep posting here (if you can). You have an army of supporters.

I love your new bracelet. I hope you wear it every day through to trial.

Sending a huge cuddle x

Just seen this thread and wanted to add my own admiration for your bravery OP. You did exactly the right thing reporting it so quickly and hopefully this will have enabled the police to collect evidence from the boat.

It's a horrendous thing that's happened, and to have the mutual 'friend' block you too - what an insult. I hope at least your DP is giving you the love and support you need at this time. I join forces with the Mumsnet army who are sending you strength and positive vibes as you go through this awful experience.