Things you’re guaranteed to find on mumsnet

[Kibble29]

I think there have been lots of serious topics on MN recently, particularly in relation to benefits, people allegedly faking mental health issues to get out of work etc.

So, in the spirit of some lightheartedness that we can all identify with, tell me some generic things you are guaranteed to find on MN.

For me, it’s in the Style & Beauty section.

A person will post and ask for recommendations for comfy joggers to wear when they WFH with no visitors or Teams calls. I think the average human would expect that people will link them to Next, H&M etc.

Instead, because it’s MN, they get “oh I love these ones. They’ve got a bit of a homeless vibe about them and obviously you wouldn’t wear them outdoors, but they’re sooo comfy and perfect for home!”

Then a link for an obscure company selling loungewear for £187 per item.

The MN chicken.

A gargantuan chicken that can provide a full roast for 6 people and then sandwiches and salads for the next four days.

Bookshelves stuffed with hundreds of books that are barely touched, but are performative of middle class status and intellectualism.

Using loo brushes to clean the lavatory is somehow disgusting.

A spa day will cure all things .

OMG it’s me. I don’t know what’s happened but - well. I won’t go I to details. But I have become never ending chicken lady.

Hit hard time's... take in ironing.

An undignified fight between two posters on a thread about something other than what they are arguing about.

“You sound unhinged”

Someone is always having sweet potato wedges for tea. If I ever see one of those “ what are you having for tea?”threads I bet myself how quickly someone will say SPWs

Someone saying that the answer to any issue is to eat more protein.

People blaming everything on perimenopause/menopause🤷

Someone on 150k a year really struggling

Certain threads I know there will be another 2 in the same day extremely similar, usually an angst written saga

Everyone's children have exquisitely curated lunchboxes with little pots of pasta and dollops of hummous everywhere.

And if you have the audacity to wonder why, you're always told something like it's not that high a wage in London and the South East or something similar! 🙄😆

Also on s&B, whatever the event and the OPs budget, preference or clothes size someone will suggest a voluminous dress that costs the best part of a grand. Black tie dinner/summer wedding/son's graduation/daughter's 21. Get the brocade marquee dress links posted.

If you’re struggling to get organised or in a routine with a family it’s always “get a cleaner!” I know one person in real life with a cleaner 😂😂

No one runs while they’re reading.

"Massive" salads.

"Sporty" children.

People who work in "a niche industry",

Husband must be at least 6ft 3, sons at least 6ft 5.

Oh and the secretive hobbies husbands do! 😆

People have children who actually eat carrot and cucumber sticks as a snack.

Get therapy for absolutely everything. Like people can actually afford it and it's so cheap and plentiful and always works wonders.

These sort of threads most weeks.

Lots of sensitive children. I understand the higher number of children with SEND because a lot of people find MN when searching for support but outside SEND MN children seem very sensitive.