Felt intimidated by person delivering my post

[Lovelybitofsquirrel3]

I was in the bath, when the doorbell rung. My bathroom is next to my front door. They then knocked aggressively. Went around the back, did the same thing. Then they came back around the front and started banging on the windows. I live in a small house and could hear it. This felt distressing to me especially since I didn’t know who it was. Got out the bath saw the sorry we missed you so knew it was the postie.

Was it a parcel? They probably didn't want to inconvenience you by taking it back to the depot. They wouldn't have known you were in the bath. Door knocking always feels more alarming and loud when one is in the bathroom, though. I hope you enjoyed your bath in the end!

I can appreciate that would be disconcerting when in the bath but I'd trade the loud approach to my postman who strokes the front door with a feather and then leaves me a "you were out" card.

it was a normal knock to begin with but the going around the back thing, knocking louder and more aggressively a LOT, and then banging on my windows too all in quick succession when my curtains were closed really frightened me. And they also did it on my bathroom window

Can you leave instructions in the future? I've put a drop box for parcels at the side of my house, they don't even knock anymore.

Are you a millennial? They're frightened of their own shadows!

Frightened? Gosh, what a strong word. An unexpected noise can make you jump but why didn't you just say to yourself "Oh well, probably the postie or something but I'm busy". It's only a noise. I think it's helpful to make a proper attempt at delivery rather than standing on a doorstep and sending telepathic messages like some. I thought you were going to say he came in and rattled the bathroom door 😂

My house is only small. They knocked a lot and very loudly, aggressively and went between doing that with aggressively banging on the windows at the front of the house. It’s not normal to bang on someone’s window when delivering post. They were also aggressive with my garden gate and did the same thing at the back. It’s how I’d expect someone in a huff to behave.

Not sure why you'd be frightened? Make you jump, sure but it's not like they can get in. I'd have just shouted I'm in the bath mate, leave it behind the hedge! Cheers!

This isn’t AIBU. I know what I experienced. No one else was there, no one on this thread was there I am disabled and they did this because they were angry that I wasn’t answering the door. It’s not ok to intimidate me.

Why didn’t you just shout to ask who it was?

I didn’t want them to know I was in whoever it was because no one I know would do that to me

Light on, car on drive , they assume someone is home ? People get very angry at missed delivery when they are at home

Refine your idea of intimidation

Intimidation- someone without any delivery knocking you up over a series of days and weeks

Not intimidation - post trying to make deliveries and knocking louder than you like ( they may be deaf / hard of hearing )

Jeez, this is quite the overreaction! He probably didn't want to have to cart your delivery around with him! You'd have probably complained if he'd left it and it got stolen too!
Has it actually occurred to you that he's either a different postman, or that he's used to you answering the door when he knocks?
I hardly see it as "being intimidated" in your own home! It was knocking at the door/windows, not a dawn raid by the SAS!

You've given no history or details to suggest the postie did this because you're disabled. Do you want to dripfeed us some info now?

P.s. so what if they were in a huff? Speculative of course. A huff itself isn't frightening. Unprofessional but not frightening. Maybe they've had a horrendous day? Maybe their diabetes is playing up, they need to find a new job because of wear and tear on their joints, they are in pain, the boss has cancelled their leave, the dog has gone blind and their daughter's got engaged to an arsehole? If you truly believe it was the actions of someone in the huff then you know the huff wasn't about you (huffs are rarely about another person).

Knocking on the door. Fine. Knocking very aggressively and in quick succession, unnecessary and not fine. THEN Going around the back of the house and knocking, not fine. Then coming back around the front of the house and banging on my door AND my windows. NOT FINE

Did you call a friend to talk it through OP? Just as an idea if you are frightened.

Always better to speak to someone you know they would have put your mind at ease.

I agree with you, knocking on your windows is out of order, I'm not surprised you were alarmed.

One of the postmen who come here, knocks once, then he is gone, with parcel, before I get a chance to get up and answer.

One extreme to the other.

Jesus wept!

He was only trying to deliver a parcel!

Put a sign on your door like we have done that instructs all couriers where to leave parcels in a safe place.

Going against the grain but I can totally understand why this would unsettle you. It's completely over the top.

My postie always knocks aggressively, despite having a bloody doorbell. Does my head in and sets the dog off.. but yeah you're being way to sensitive! Who else would it be?

We’ve got two posties and one of them knocks like that. My front door opens straight into my living room and sometimes he’s knocked twice by the time I’ve cleared the room from the sofa to the door. Does my head in, sometimes he sounds like he’s trying to break the door down. One time I said loudly “Alright, God!!!” on the way to the door and he did look sheepish and say sorry when I answered. Still does it though.

He really won’t be doing it to intimidate you OP. As aggressive as it sounds he’s just doing his job and trying to make sure you can hear the door. Some of then are just really impatient.

Unless you have an angry ex/haven't paid your drug dealer/ are wanted by the police etc

I agree. It seems OTT. Knocking then knocking more loudly on the front door is fine because you might not have heard, but then going round the back of the house and banging on your windows isn’t fine, and is not anything a normal postie would do.

I would complain. If you don't answer the front door it's not ok to go round the back banging on doors and crazy to bang on windows. That would have scared me.