Incognito job description (lighthearted)

[jacquec]

I don't like to divulge my occupation openly and instead describe it in a, technically accurate, but unrelated sounding way. Whether you actually do this or not, I thought it'd be interesting to see how people would describe their job if they had to make it sound different, and whether we could guess what the real occupation was from said description.

Mine is that I work with candles.

PIP assessor? DWP? But maybe not because they don't read documents or look at evidence before turning down.

Security guard at a supermarket (at the exit) or those supermarket staff who watch you scan your stuff at self service?

I stalk living people so I can find out what they know about other living people.

I also find dead people.

Plebotomist?

Post Coital worker

I listen to people trying to help other people, and decide whether they are doing it safely enough.

I also teach people to help people, help people to help people, and occasionally help the people myself.

Midwife?

Traffic warden?

Librarian / English teacher 😆

I repeatedly work myself out of a job to move many bits.

SLT?

I push down on a plastic doll, repeatedly.

Children's librarian 😁

@TheDogsMother - very nosey, for money - are you a PI/ detective?

Sadly not so interesting. A recruitment consultant 🤣

I make important decisions, often based on something that hasn't happened yet.

Once a fortnight I give people a list of things to do.

Then every day for a fortnight I ask those people if they've done it yet.

At the end of the fortnight I ask them to show what they've done, then we all have a big chat about why they didn't do everything on the list.

First aid trainer :)

Scrum master?

First aid trainer lol

Trader?

I fry eggs and clean toilets

Counsellor / supervisor

Genealogist

@Teapotmonkey yes! I specialise in DNA genealogy