Rightmove Gem.

[PriamFarrl]

Crazy description ✔️
Detailed picture of every toilet ✔️
Pictures of random trees ✔️
Pictures of a dog ✔️
Pictures of the actual house ❎

www.rightmove.co.uk/properties/129160883#/?channel=RES_BUY

🏃what's inside the rolled up towels?????😬

The trapped nightmares of people who have been forced to stay there

My brain literally can’t compute much of that… it’s shut down.

I liked the pictures of the dog though!

So when you stay in, on booking dot com, does the owner stay in another room? Or is it ‘made’ into a 1 bed for your stay and you get the whole thing? Confused…

**Stay in it

Hideous house. And that description! I’d love to see the twat who owns it.

I love how the agent dissociates themselves completely from the bizarre dissertation on the place.

I have a nailed-on image of how I imagine the owner to look. It's a man, incidentally.

My goodness! 😳

Me too 😆

Marvellous find, OP. I too thought swingers. The whole jacuzzi spa and massage chairs is an odd vibe but who knows. On booking.com it has 7 reviews, 2 of which are identical one word ones saying "exceptional" so likely fake. The whole thing is utterly bonkers. And that awful green paint everywhere is vile. It's haunting just to look at, no way would I spend hundreds of pounds a night actually staying there

Also that first floor floor plan with the bathrooms??? Why are there three bathrooms off the hallway but two bathrooms off the main bedroom alone? What an utterly bizarre set up. To be secure when going for a wee, you'd be running around like a blue arsed fly making sure all doors leading off the bathroom were locked

Being home to the Ministry of Defense and having GCHQ up the road in Cheltenham, it is also a very protected City which has been heavily invested in by the Government.

Well that's nice (if misspelled)

Coombe Dingle though.

Well. That was quite something.😳🤮😵‍💫🤯

Two bathrooms off the main bedroom is the 'Jack and Jill' thing he's wittering about. His n hers facilities. Not a bad idea, though the terminology is both twee and heteronormative, maybe that was god's input to the plans.

Perfect place for Rosemary to have her Baby.

I have learned something though. I never knew before that God is a German.

What does pulchritudinous mean?

It is the least beautiful imaginable word for "beautiful"

It's a tasteless monstrosity.

The quest for potential buyers must be like looking for a needle in a haystack.

Wtf have I just read😂

"Hyper-Personalized for unique and special individuals who appreciate creative celebration, God, culture oneness and uniqueness and an obsession with the color green"

Whatever the EA's commission is, I doubt it will be enough.

It means beautiful, but is only applied to people (afaik always women).

Grandiose otoh... that fits. 'Characterized by excessive self-importance or affected grandeur; pompous.'

The BBC should buy it, they could commission some sort of murder mystery specifically to fit. It could feature the most ways to kill someone with bathroom fittings.

OMG, the dining room / optional bedroom has an en suite kitchen leading to the lounge 😂

The dog is very cute, I’d happily take the dog.

The rest is for sex people. Vile.

@ErrolTheDragon I get the concept; we have a Jack and Jill bathroom between our bedrooms 2-3. But to have two bathrooms off one master bedroom just sounds really odd to me. A bathroom with two sinks, fine, but two bathrooms?