Rightmove Gem.

[PriamFarrl]

Crazy description ✔️
Detailed picture of every toilet ✔️
Pictures of random trees ✔️
Pictures of a dog ✔️
Pictures of the actual house ❎

www.rightmove.co.uk/properties/129160883#/?channel=RES_BUY

Wowsers, so many random photos where you can't even work out what's in the photo!😆

Soo... What drugs do we think the house reeks of?

Reading that description reminded me of the 12 days of Christmas centrepiece description on eBay.

This has to win an award for the best find on mumsnet of most bizarre house to exist, let alone the write up!

Good grief! My eyes were hurting! As my Nan would say, the owners “have a catalogue of bad taste and aren’t afraid to use it”. 🤣 madcap combo colours, then green and brown, some marble slab funeral parlour chic, wonky angles, and the blurb is something else.
not worth £800 imo.

All of them at once.

@TwoMonthsOff 🤣🤣🤣 thanks for that, good to know it's better than prison! I lost the will to live before I got that far!!

Did it mention the dog coming with the house?!?!

@PriamFarrl picture 68!!

My eyes! You just know the seller is 1. a deluded bloke who is dictating to the EA how this gem must be marketed; and 2. that he'd be a nightmare seller.

I bet they get loads of people just wanting to have a nosey. The red roses on the towels on the bed are meant to look elegant and romantic. They don't - they look cheesy and naff.

I couldn't make it past photo 43 -is that the world's biggest bog roll?
and why does every ceiling seem to have escape hatches/portals?
and I don't trust those weird repeating carvings and tile patterns
😮

"A pulchritudinous, grandiose detailed property" .

Excellent find OP.

Yes that’s my first thought too. It’s absolutely horrendous. Quire scary too. You feel you’d never leave…

I bet anything the owner went to a steiner school

even successful transformed former criminals have all visited and unanimously declared it’s the best they’ve seen/stayed in and have all left feeling “inspired”.

I'll bet they have... 😂😆😂

Full description in the owner’s words

Good grief. And I couldn't find the photo of the dog, I gave up looking.

I’m confident the lucky purchasers will find the buying process trouble free, given the vendors are clearly not INSANE.

Rohypnol and poppers are my guess 😄

Absolutely crackers.

Why are so many of the bedrooms in the floor plan listed as 'optional'? Is it the lack of windows?

Those roses make me never want to be alone in that house with the current owner

Inspiration
A property and living space inspired from God,

WTF

Hilarious!

I want to know who lives in the ground floor flat….?

I'm pretty sure optional means unfinished

Does it come with the rather fetching dancing bearded man thrown in ???😝👀

I think it's the:

Glass Bridge in the vaulted lounge/drawing/music room going between mezzanine upper 2nd floors, celebrating Brunel’s engineering genius and his Bristol connection.

Strike is the estate agency that offers a free of charge option, where the owner writes their own description and takes their own photos ... which is proper bloody stingey not bothering to pay £700 for a professional service when you're flogging an £800k home!

I'm also a bit confused ... that floor plan shows 1 existing bedroom, all the others are "optional".

The dog is pic 99.