Being nosey...How many people have you slept with?

[Midlifecrisisat30]

I've recently had my first ever one night stand after after breaking my virginity at 14 (young I know) and alot of short lived relationships with sex after a few weeks.
Just wrote my list and was surprised that I've slept with 16 men! That seems alot for someone who hadn't had a one night stand until a few months ago!

My DH had slept with three people when we met/got married. We split up a fortnight ago when I found out his number is now about 15.

@swissmilk

This is going to be an essay! But let’s say you’ve had a lot of meals out in a lot of restaurants in your life. Off the top of your head, you’ll probably only remember a the spectacular ones and the truly awful ones and the ones you associate with something particular memorable. But usually, if one of your fellow diners said “remember that meal we had in the Lebanese place in Balham that time on the way home from seeing The Nutcracker just after Christmas?” you’ll suddenly remember both the meal and the whole evening out you had.

For me, a lot of my sexual partners/experiences are like that. I can’t list 150 people’s names by rote. But if I’m talking to a friend and one of them comes up; or I find myself in a part of the city which reminds me of someone; or I smell someone’s perfume on the train and it was the same as that of someone I slept with, I’ll recall them and their name and the sex we had very easily.

The vast majority of the sex has been good. About 25% has been extremely good. About 10% has been poor. Couldn’t say I’ve ever had genuinely awful sex, though. And there are so many ways I can rate a sexual partner as being good - it isn’t necessarily about the most orgasms, or the attractiveness of the person, or how many positions we did it in (although I have several memorable ones on those counts.) It can be the woman I made an immediate connection with in a club and we ended up going back to mine and just spending hours laughing and talking like old friends in between playing and kissing and touching; or the instant, smoking hot chemistry I had with a Tinder ONS from NYC who I hooked up with whilst he was visiting London for work; or the man I met when I was travelling between St Petersburg and Moscow by sleeper train and the memory of his weight on top of me in the single cabin bed and the feverish sexiness of us both trying not to make much noise because the wooden cabin walls were paper thin.

The restaurant-sexual partner comparison is also a pretty shorthand of way of saying that I see sex as a recreational and social activity like a lot of other stuff :)

I was single until I was 33. I had several ons a year until that point. I wrongly believed I was in control and was living the ultimate single, career woman lifestyle. It was all a bit boring and never as exciting as the fantasy.

33 met first proper partner, then bounced through a few short term relationships before finding now OP, aged 36.

I don't ever want to have a ONS again.

6! Lost my virginity at 16 and all were boyfriends apart from one who I met off a parenting forum ( not this one, but one very similar!!). We were both single parents so met for a drink.....

Between 30 and 40 I guess. Lost virginity nearly 17 years old. About 12 one night stands and lots of boyfriends / flings. Met husband aged 24 and been together 19 years.

1, met my husband when I was seventeen and I'm now 53.

1. I doubt it will ever increase because I don't see myself wanting another relationship, it would feel like cheating on DH.

How do you keep count once you get past 20? Particularly those that are over 70...do you keep a written list or something?

1. XH and DP. Lost my virginity at 22. Would love to be the kind of person who had ONS in between, but I'm just not.

31

I'm late twenties - 8.
4 relationships
1 dating
1 friend with benefits
2 ONS (I knew both of them as friends though)

I'm now engaged to number 8 and pregnant

Had to think add it was all 30 years ago!!

Met dh when I was 23. Including him 8.

3 LTR (> 1 year) including DH
1 Holiday "romance"
2 (drunken, rebound, felt like shit after) ONS with acquaintances from friendships group
2 which would now probably be called FWB which were stop gaps between LTR

About 50. Most between 18 and 22 but 10 in the last 7 year's. A mix of relationships and fwbs and a one night stand. Have a similar attitude towards sex as a previous poster. It's fun and as long as it's consensual and no one is getting hurt, why not.

1. And never a one night stand. That is something I could never do.

2...I'm 27

1. First one a three year relationship. Second my DH who I've been with for almost 14 years.

Eight. Lost my virginity when I was 15 (which I now know is too young!) but at least it was with a boyfriend of the same age and we were together a year or so. Three of the eight were ONS, one was a flat mate/friend and it only happened a few times, the others have all been proper boyfriends (one is now my DH).

No idea. Approx 50 I suppose. 2 women, the rest men. Quite tame in comparison with many of my friends (and my OH) though - the 90s free party scene was a very promiscuous time for many people.

In the last decade, only one.

1. And I'm 38.

Only 1. (Met him at uni when I was 18, lost virginity to each other, been together since. We're 30 now and neither have had other partners, sexual or otherwise.)

7 men I’m 66 so I’m pretty sure it’s my limit. Men can jump in a lake for all I care.

7

Somewhere between 10 and 20 but only 1 in the last 12years since i met DP

8 - hopefully that’ll stay the number, the last was my DH who I met 14yrs ago when I was 22.

19! I'm 31. Been with DH for 6 years. Was with ex fiancé for 4 years previous to that, and another 2 boyfriends for 2 years each prior to ex fiancé. The others were casual flings, short term relationships, and a few ONS. Lost my virginity at 14 (too young imo)