The “women’s march” that’s all about the men.

[BackToLurk]

I couldn’t see a thread about this, but I’m just here to share how annoying it is to see a so-called women’s march so concerned with placating men. This is the march in January.

As well as the highly predictable “this is for all women” (meaning including the ones who are men) and the ‘we don’t tolerate transphobia’ (meaning any concept of sex-based oppression), the Facebook group is full of posts reassuring men that of course they’re welcome and it’s not all men and obviously “not my Nigel”. It’s infuriating. Why do people do this?

I'm sorry you were treated like that by supposedly feminist women in order to pander to men many of us know what that feels like.

Maybe this is the ultimate sunlight. We can be out own worst enemies sometimes. I can smell the sanctimony from some of those posts

Basically a lot of fawning over men who wanted to join in and berating of any women who questioned anything.

But I can't get over the organiser wanting to 'belt' terfs, tbh.

TigerLily, I'm sorry. It could have been a good thing, and god knows women could use some solidarity! But quite honestly sounds like you're better off out if it.

I was just made to feel it was me who had the problem and that I am not a feminist just because I don't pander to men. Go figure.

I’m so sorry you had that experience. Thank you for being willing to stand up for women.

Thank you for your kind words. It could have been worse, I could have sat there and said nothing and be affiliated with such harmful content. They don't realise how harmful it is towards women and even the trans community spouting rubbish and hatred like that.

I sometimes wonder if these people are deliberately sabotaging things, tbh.

I wonder too as there is no other explanation to it. I would never go to a pride march and demand my rights as a woman be highlighted. I would see it as a set march for a set group of people. I would show more respect

I think they're just standard 3rd wave 'feminists' tbh. Every decision made by a woman is inherently feminist in their eyes regardless of how much it reinforces male power or damages women as a whole. You add to that 'inclusive as long as you agree with us' and that's how you get the situation of removing from the group a woman who questioned the value of 'dressing slutty ' and a woman who gave a very clear explanation of women as a sex class and the nature of oppression. And how you get a woman querying the value of 'sex work' being told to educate herself.

It's not you with the problem. Kudos for speaking up.

I missed the post about sex work, what did it say? They are the ones who need to educate themselves imo.

Somebody asked if sex workers are welcome. The answer of course couldn't just be "of course, all women are welcome" (let's face it everyone is. Come one come all). Nooo, the "sex work is just like working in Tesco" posts had to follow. One women said something that suggested she thought that sex workers should be supported, but encouraged out of it. I think she said "back to their sisters". She was then put right. She's very thankful for having been put right. I've just looked and I think the educate yourself comment has gone. Presumably because she's seen the light.

As an aside, the original comment said they were "passionate about marching for violence against sex workers". I'm assuming that's not what they really meant.

Solidarity @TigerLily40. I got banned for raising a few points...

I raised my concerns about silencing women who were wanting to protest for safe spaces for women including rape centres and prisons. I highlighted it wasn't a pride parade and that women were also concerned about the amount of men who were going to be there. They had an X account but took it down as they were getting put to rights over it. They said they would "sort out" those opposing them at the march.

So they are against sex workers?

I feel so deflated @TigerLily40. I know I'm far more gender critical than most women who would say they were feminists, which is fine. But the points I raised really weren't GC, they were about cantering women at a women's march. Isn't the clue in the name? And then I think I was actually banned for rudeness. If they think I'm rude, they should meet the patriarchy...

Anyway, given I'm mentioned upthread this is makes me super identifiable. I've namechanged for this and will now name change again but just wanted to give you a wave and hope I catch you around sometime. Thanks for everything you were doing to try and set things up too.

What did you say if you don't mind me asking?

I'm biting my tongue soooo hard. I'm trying to wait until closer to the date to go rogue. I really had to stop myself posting a link to the Manchester dangerous 'woman' story with the comment. "Lots of people have said they're worried about men attending, but let's not forget women can attack other women too"

If you're the person I'm thinking of, you were awesome. And not rude at all.

@TigerLily40 A poster had organised a march where the men had been asked to march at the back. All I did was say that would be a good idea and that including men was (by definition) excluding some women. There was a bit of back and forth between me and the mod and I think I actually got banned for rudeness, I didn't get an explanation. And I wasn't rude.

For sex work, but against sex workers.

Thanks @BackToLurk, yes I think I'm the person you mentioned on Wednesday.

Honestly, I just wish people would apply some critical reflection.
The mod probably had a visceral, unconscious reaction to being asked to do something that would make men feel fleetingly uncomfortable. That's her social conditioning working to protect her. It's cool. But just take five minutes to think why you're feeling uncomfortable before you press that big ban button. Maybe it's the suggestion rather than the person, and maybe there's a reason for that...

I am probably identifiable too and I took am really deflated with what happened. I was so excited when I first heard about it and felt so passionate about it. I am too probably deemed gender critical too but t rightfully so as it is just getting worse for us women. I hate being called a cis woman as to me that takes away my identity as a woman. I am not cis, I am woman!

They make no sense whatsoever!