The Bluestocking is reopening

[ErrolTheDragon]

It's time we reopened the Bluestocking, I think.

This is the FWR pub, situated in the charming village of Badley Fuckitt near the Shady Pines rest home. It has a cannon (for reasons lost in the mists of time), goats in the paddock next to the beer garden and a menu including many soups and cakes. It's open all hours, serving breakfast and tea to all weary women, in addition to being the ideal location to metaphorically drown your sorrows.

Naice coffee ...

Is anyone going up to the bar? I would go myself but the pub cat is sat on my lap forbidding me to move.

I'll have a Bass shandy and a packet of scampi fries.

What time does the guy with the cockles and mussels arrive? I'm in the mood for some.

I'll get yours. I'm partial to a bitter shandy myself.

Thank you! It's that sort of weather! Not in the mood for a drink drink but don't fancy a coke.

Does the cat want anything?

I'm back, exhausted, from a family wedding and just wanted to interject that a book of tables isn't times tables.

It is sine, cosine and tangent calculations for all the different angles.

I did my maths O level with no calculator, and just a book of tables. I got a B. Which I was over the moon with. My maths teacher wasn't, he wanted me to use the bloody calculator.

Anyway, I need sleep.

Fresh chicken, roasted not boiled.

Cooked Crab, prepared not in shell

Some lactose free milk

annnnnnnd erm ooh I'll have a couple of olives to chase around the floor later.

Purrrrrr 😺

Is the cat ignoring you? as punishment for the abandonment, or are you being love bombed in the hopes of treats?

We had logs in ours as well. I don't think we were allowed calculators in our O-levels, but were for A levels.

Hello!? Anyone?

I'm in a room. I think it's used for storing the function room tables and chairs, there's a really dusty juke box. I've not seen anyone for ages. Could someone dispatch a gerbil?

What time does the guy with the cockles and mussels arrive?

Is that the guy who sings a lot, identifies as a fishmonger and calls himself 'Molly'?

Three on their way to you!

I've never paid that much attention to be honest! To be fair at the time they come in I'm probably well past half cut!

Gender-neutral use of 'guy', she's just been with the shellfish delivery so both Beetle and the cat are fed.

To be fair it was! The pub I worked in we used to get either the wife or the husband coming in but both were called the cockle man!

(I personally was a milk man in my younger days!)

The cat ate a fair share of my tray I will admit! It's got very fast paws!

I bet she didn't share her crab with you though.

The gerbils have reached me. Ah, they've brought Kendal Mint cake.

Oooft, i need to come in and put my feet up for a moment. Please tell me under-18s aren't allowed in the bar so I can hide from the kids for a minute

Can i ask for the complete works of Harry Potter please, I never read them.

Oh how I envy you! What a treat you have in store to read all of the books.

My husband hasn't read them and as I'm sick of saying 'it doesn't happen like that in the books!!' while we're watching the films, we are currently listening to the books on Audible, when we are driving around. Listening to Stephen Fry's voice is wonderful but his erratic pronunciation of Malfoy is getting on my wick!

Um.... if I added 'and is from Dublin's fair city' would it help? or have I just, in comedy terms, died?😨

Not a scrap!

The other thing is i have an ear worm now, Ayn Rand was mentioned back post, and i did not know who she was until i nipped in to the reading room and checked her out.

my ear worm is Simon and Garfunkle “simple deseltory philippic” i could have spelt this wrong.

One of my fave songs

<bob dylan voice>

Ive been Iyn randed, nearly branded , a communist cos i am left handed, thats the hand i use… well never mind.

I've just found the vintage pachinko machines room!

I'll be here a while!

While I'm at the bar...something long and cool please, not an eel...does anyone else want anything?