Gym /. Swimming changing issue

[BelfastDadof3]

I'll start first and say I'm sorry for intruding on a safe space for women.
Am a single dad (widow but not recent) with three kids 2 girls 11 +13 and a 9yr old boy.

Also I'd say kids are bright and confident, very excepting as I've tried to bring them up to accept all body shapes and not point / shame.

I go to the gym three times a week, do my workout and the kids have a supervised kids swim lesson (just the three of them) and I meet them after for a swim and play.

There isn't family changing, but I don't think it's applicable as my girls are old enough.

So having a muffin after the swim my 9yr old boy asked me.
"dad, why do most of the men walk about naked in the changing room?Willie's out. Is it not normal to have a towel around you untill you get your pants on."

So I said some people were just very free, but I think it's a bit over the top. Bit of a discussion about respecting others space etc and then my boy said" it's also odd that some shave all their body hair off, even the old fat men, it's weird looking"

Normal ish conversation.

Then he asked the girls what happens in the changing rooms. They were a bit horrified and said that most women and girls had big towels and kept private. Because - their words " girls arnt horrible like boys"

Then the eldest daughter said "a room full of men drying their bits would be duscusting. When the [transwoman - edited by MNHQ] is in the changing room we use the disabled cubicle. There's lots of room and we don't have to see him dry his bits. And (jokingly) his man bum and huge boobs do not look nice."

So really I don't know how to approach this.
I presumed that if a man transfered to a trans woman he would have female genitals. Maybe I'm niave.

It's a really nice gym and pool - Bannatynes - a treat for the kids..
Is this the same everywhere?
If I raise it with the manager am I being transphobic to suggest no penises in the female changing?

Did I miss your statistical proof or peer reviewed research on that risk of committing sex crime @CalMeKate ?

Oh bloody hell @Helleofabore and I forgot my bingo card today

people with DSD may or may not be trans because a biological condition about the development of sexual characteristics is nothing whatsoever to go with gender identity

Why on earth is that necessary?

An additional gender neutral facility can be provided.

It’s turning into ‘what if’ bingo.

No actual responding to the fact she’s been called out on her false posts, just another made up scenario to play ‘gotcha’ with

You forgot the furry community, oh dear.

I actually hope she is a msn because the thought this is an actual woman who works in safeguarding is actually terrifying

The thread is about an actual situation.

There is no need to invent scenarios.

There are loads of women like this though.

Coaching children to do what men want.

To daughters: That man over there wants to be known as a transwoman because he believes he is a woman. Let him get on with it BUT that does not give him the right to go into a toilet or changing room with you. If you see a naked man in the changing room, even if he is a transwoman, go to a trusted grown up.
To sons: that man over there wants to be known as a transwoman because he believes he is a woman. Let him get on with it. You may see him in the toilets. Treat him like any other man. He is not allowed into the ladies.

Same for transmen.
Not fucking hard.
Have had this conversation already as our local librarian likes lippy.
And my daughter likes her space.

Ok I am a few pages behind but it is really inappropriate that you are enjoying this as a spectator sport with gleeful grins and popcorn. This impacts on women's LIVES, on their children's LIVES.

Offer suggestions, be helpful, argue your position. But grabbing popcorn? How dare you be so flippant.

”Take an example, your local cinema changes their toilets to unisex. People using these toilets are men, women’s, transmen, transwomen, non-binary people, gender fluid people, and people with XXY chromosome syndrome. How are you going to prepare your children for what behaviour is acceptable in those toilets? What terminology and language would you use to
discuss this?”

You really don’t seem to understand feminist’s position at all! And you really are displaying your prejudiced belief of feminist’s position.

If these are floor to ceiling individual cubicles, what are you believing we need to ‘prepare’ our children for? The sight of a person entering into a cubicle?

Do you understand yet how prejudiced your posts are? You are now somehow doubling down on the falsehood that we deny trans people exist! wATF!!!

So you are fucking misinformed about what feminists believe, you are homophobic, transphobic and you have weaponised people’s medical condition of having differences of sex development !

All to tell a father that he should prepare his daughters to not be uncomfortable in seeing a male dick in a female single sex space!

And you legitimately believe you are on the right side of history? Fuck! This has been something to see.

Damn, where did I put my Bingo dabber? I tell you, it's astonishing how readily these brave and stunning warriors for The Right Side of History will flail so mendaciously, grasping at any victims their glittery eye alights on that they can fling onto the purifying pyre of Righteousness.

Thank you again @CalMeKate for your brilliant work on behalf of HashtagBeKind!

I don’t know how anyone can say they’d be uncomfortable seeing a surprise penis but I have to teach my 9 year old to be ok with it.

No.

Its bad enough knowing that there’s a worryingly high chance at some point some arsehole will expose himself to my child because it’s such a common place activity that is STILL happening to too many girls and women without someone making exemptions for special penises.

Thankyou for putting this more succinctly and eloquently than I ever could.

Isn't it just!

It was in response to the "let's go back to the beginning" post which as frequent posters knew was an introduction to a laborious "education" of trans ally rote learning.

It was a harmless comment.

Thank you! I simply assumed that that poster got the wrong end of the stick, but even if not, I'm not fussed.

(In all seriousness, of course this is a horrific situation - but the TRSOH warrior is basically doing a sterling job for us, without us needing to do anything but shine a spotlight on all their posts!).

You tell your child "Men in women's single sex spaces, no matter how that man identifies is NOT acceptable EVER"

”I don’t know how anyone can say they’d be uncomfortable seeing a surprise penis but I have to teach my 9 year old to be ok with it.”

the hypocrisy in the latest twists and pivots are interesting. It now reads like a person who confesses to being ‘uncomfortable’ but who is now out there telling girls of all ages that they need to get over any discomfort they have because ‘the future is here baby and it is naked male genitals in your face! And you cannot flinch because you will be a hateful bigot’!. (Bolding for emphasis) Whereas Kate can pretend to be a good ally and show their achievements while being dreadfully uncomfortable themselves, because they really DO understand that these male people are abusers!

50% of women have been victims of domestic violence by male partners and ex partners
20-36% of girls are sexually abused in childhood
20% of women have been sexually assaulted or raped since the age of 16 in the UK
3 women per week are killed by men in the UK in 2019 and this has been consistent since this data was collected
3 times more sexual violence is perpetrated against girls in childhood than boys
700,000 - 2,000,000 women and girls are trafficked across the world for sex every year
7-40% of women report that their first sexual experience was forced (rape)
Of female sex workers in the Uk 50% working outdoors and 26% working indoors have been subject to violence
81% of women sex workers in the UK have been beaten, choked, raped, threatened with a weapon, slashed, or stabbed
estimates show that’s hundred of thousands of women are systematically raped during warfare including rape as a tactic for ethnic cleansing through impregnation
60-100 million women are missing from the global population due to sex-selective abortion, female infanticide and deliberate neglect of female newborn babies

sources;
Femicide census 2020 and CSEW 2017

Women and girls matter. I don’t for a second believe that transwomen do not commit sexual assault and rape against women, girls, and children. However MEN far outweigh the balance of predatory risk

However MEN far outweigh the balance of predatory risk

And transwomen are.... MEN

Sorry for misunderstanding!

Women and girls matter. I don’t for a second believe that transwomen do not commit sexual assault and rape against women, girls, and children. However MEN far outweigh the balance of predatory risk

Those blinkers aren't coming off are they!

No worries!

Meanwhile, we should all carry on "enjoying" @CalMeKate's brave and stunning work on behalf of The RIght Side of History - I see the flailing through the Bingo card is gaining pace

Women and girls matter. I don’t for a second believe that transwomen do not commit sexual assault and rape against women, girls, and children. However MEN far outweigh the balance of predatory risk

TW are men. Honestly please keep on posting, you are doing our work for us