Trans chat

[Babyjakesmum]

I haven't been on Mumsnet in a while, but have dropped back in to see what was going on when I heard about the sponsors dropping Mumsnet because of anti-trans hate. I expected it to be a storm in a tea cup.

But sadly, I have to say that I find the level of bitter hatred on here to be utterly breathtaking. I have trans people in my family. I have friends who have trans people, and the way they are being discussed here is simply appalling.

Being trans isn't something anyone takes lightly, or lives lightly either. It's is not mental illness, it is not an excuse to abuse children, it is not a passing fad. It is bloody hard on those who find themselves in that situation, and this sort of hate-fest of ignorance and accusation only makes their lives even harder.

I used to come on here to talk about my babies and life as a Mum, and it was supportive and safe space for me to talk openly about my feelings and experiences. It no longer feels safe for anyone. I don't think I will be coming back to be a regular again. I cannot comprehend what has become of the people on here for this level of narrow mindedness to be flourishing.

Make no mistake, I am an old school, campaigning, hard-bitten feminist, and have been since before half the people on here were born. I understand the feminist anti-trans arguments but I find all of it to be empty of any basis in reality. Trans people aren't lurking in changing rooms, trans people aren't after your kids or trying to undermine your own femininity. They are having a very hard time in life.

I know you can cite a handful of examples, but then there are always a handful of example of anything. One Karen White does not mean you write off all trans-people as criminals.

I would say to you to get to know an actual transperson and see what the reality is, except that I wouldn't want any vulnerable person subjected to this.... you also probably do already know a transperson somewhere in your life, but most don't wear a badge to tell you that because it's actually none of your business what clothes or pronouns someone chooses to use.

Its great having a trans-chat isn't it, Ted?

Maybe she meant she's a hard bitten feminine?

I wondered if she meant hard bitten by feminists - which would explain the obvious grudge?

You are free to do things your way and I am also free to approach them as I please

Of course, but then you probably need also expect to get deleted now & then, and accused of being hateful; and also be involved in long, overly protracted hostile exchanges.

15th rule of misogyny: Men are better at performing femininity than women are because they invented it and it gives them a boner.

I think I'll manage with any patronizingly "helpful" suggestions.

I wondered if she meant hard bitten by feminists - which would explain the obvious grudge?

It's the Thighs again, isn't it? They're a bit bitey!

I think I'll manage with any patronizingly "helpful" suggestions

Not a suggestion, just an observation.

OP forgot to offer up a bucket of piss. That's it! By jiminy, fourteen pages in and we've got it!

If nobody gets my reference I'm going to be so disappointed.

One of the thighs did say they visited FWR and came back wiping their mouth 👄

Blame the Patriarchy, not the Thightriarchy.

Please help us, we're afraid. It's the Ikea thread, we've gone too far and we think Sweden's coming for us. I may have mentioned the war.

Did you insult their meatballs?

I’ve just read at the thread. Are Ikea objecting to you holding them to ransom for a moatful of sharks?

Absolutely no idea why my post was deleted. Haven’t had an email.
I laughed at datun’s dad and the sage body-con advice, and then took issue with the ‘none of you know anyone trans’ tosh. Extensively.
It took me blardy ages. And if you happened to know me (I regularly name change since Jeffrey published my password and I had to spend all night berating myself that the guidance not to use your real email address and the same passwords for your online banking might have been quite sensible after all) would quite likely have outed me. So unless they are attempting to claim that they took it down for my own personal security, I have no idea why it was deleted.
I think I did end it with ‘Reality isn’t transphobic’. 🤷‍♀️

Thigh

Was it the gin soaked after-school wanking?

Datun no, not just that, I think they just hate us because we cannot uphold the twee!

We did make one friend but she ran away! ☹️

Still wondering what the origin of the Thigh posters is, I must have missed something.

Hi folks

Purposeful derailing isn't on - can we stop now? Thanks.

Oh dear! My civil and constructive statement has been removed.
I shall lurk more now instead of attempting to contribute to the civil and constructive 'debate' as I clearly do not understand the meaning of words.

Lily, what constitutes a derail of a thread set up for the purpose of telling the women here they are very bad people? This is an honest question. If you don't want any more posts, then taking down the thread or closing it to further replies seems the best course. How are women supposed to respond to a scolding like the OP if the thread is still open to responses? Do we just thank the OP for it and issue long mea culpas?

Purposeful derailing isn't on - can we stop now? Thanks.

Could you please explain what constitutes a 'purposeful derailing'?
I only ask as no one who has had their posts deleted seems to have any emails from HQ explaining why?

Purposeful derailing isn't on - can we stop now? Thanks.

Is that one-way de-railing?

Creepster, for the life of me, I can't see what you said that broke guidelines. Generalisation?