Never Gonna Kyiv You Up: Grand Final Eurovision 2017

[SuffolkNWhat]

Welcome one and all to the Grand Final thread!

Put up a chair, grab your blue cocktail and join us for an evening of dancing gorillas and loads of red and white outfits.

The running order of the Grand Final of the 2017 Eurovision Song Contest:

1. Israel: Eye Candy
   
2. Poland: First Aid Kit Dress
   
3. Belarus: Boat Wind Machine and Sticky Back Plastic Guitar
   
4. Austria: Lee Ryan in Dreamworks
   
5. Armenia: Hyundai Bollywood Dancers
   
6. The Netherlands: Talent Contest Rejects
   
7. Moldova: Epic Sax Guy Solo
   
8. Hungary: Sgt Pepper's Rapping Gypsies
   
9. Italy: Dancing Gorilla
   

10. Denmark: "Danish" Traitor with a Massive Gin and Red Dress
11. Portugal: Singing Werewolf in his Dad's Suit
12. Azerbaijan: Goth, Ladders and scary Horseman
13. Croatia: Go Compare Pavarotti Man
14. Australia: Bush don't come cheap, buy him some socks
15. Greece: Wet Underwear in a Paddling Pool
16. Spain
17. Norway: Darth Punk
18. United Kingdom: Whole Lotta Gold
19. Cyprus: Fair Isle Sequins and Gravity
20. Romania: Yodelling Taylor Swift and Her Massive Glittery Cannons
21. Germany: They really don't want to win
22. Ukraine
23. Belgium: All Alone in the Rabbit Headlight Zone
24. Sweden: TopMan ad. Too Frikkin Beautiful to be Dr Evil
25. Bulgaria: Bieber Untouchable Child
26. France: it'll be in French.

A huge thanks to RedToothBrush for the summaries on the last thread and GinSwigmore for the thread title.

[SuperBeagle]

Poland always does well with the televote though.

[Redcrayons]

Boring.

[OublietteBravo]

Still don't understand how this made it past the semi stage.

[myoriginal3]

There is something about this performance which suggests she is speaking English?

[Fiderer]

Shame her luggage & dress got lost & she had to improvise with kitchen roll stolen from the hotel kitchen.

[JaneJeffer]

Well DS1 is already out...

[SuffolkNWhat]

Poland were in the stronger group too weren't they?

[ChardonnayKnickertonSmythe]

It's dragging on a bit...

[Akire]

How many dresses tonight will be fashion with one sleeve, don't know why this one dosnt wear a white bikini and be done with your

[Raahh]

Freedom- that's what her boobs are looking for.

[OhYouBadBadKitten]

bit boring this one.
Need more fiddle and less singing!

[RedToothBrush]

Poland is just meh.

[Akire]

*it

[MrsDoylesTeabags]

Oh I think I like these

[dillite]

I am now on Poland as I had to put DD and the dog to bed. How is everyone tonight? Excited?

[SuperBeagle]

I have a real issue with Belarus' face.

[OublietteBravo]

Will her dress get trapped in the fan?

[totoromama]

That was forgettable

[SuperBeagle]

The bloke, that is.

[SuffolkNWhat]

Ah yes the decoupage guitar

[ilovesooty]

I like this one!

[OhYouBadBadKitten]

that was a lively start!

[Raahh]

Nearly all the dresses seemed to be leotard types with see- through skirts.

oh it's the folksy Sixpence None the Richer one.

And again, the subtitles are not in English