Im a minger Help!!!!

[BitterHarvest]

My husband is getting more gorgeous with every year that passes. Hes really grown in to himself. Me, on the other hand am turning into my grandmother. I am a mum who works at home. Housewife we would have been called back in the day. Im in my mid 50's now and I need a glow up. I never wore make up and i think i need to start. but since many of my days are spent only in the house or caring for elderly mum i dont know when to put it on, Also whats a casual but polished style now adays with out looking like the local free P pastors wife?
i need serious help. Photo for ref. dont look quite my age yet but no idea how to dress or what to do with my face. can i have advice please Skincare regime is good and skin is clear. thanks peeps.

I am no oil painting but I dont think that jumper is doing you any favours. Maybe try a contrasting colour like navy or raspberry with a white t-shirt underneath to brighten it up a bit.

I'd advise you to go to the doctor - your face is very swollen and looks jaundiced.

You have a great figure. What's your hair like?

The outfit is doing nothing for you at all…I get it needs to be comfy for a carer but try out some different cuts of jeans and see what suits you, maybe a high waist boot cut or baggy (which can be flattering if they fit well)

some funky trainers. Maybe adidas gazelles or something comfy and a nice top with a bit of tailoring/shape to it. Again doesn’t need to be fancy just not a square box

light bb cream and some mascara, tiny bit of blush and lip gloss will make more difference than you think but still look natural. Wander round the shops and see what takes your fancy, just try stuff

Missing the point of the thread, how is a mum that works at home the same thing as a housewife?

Ps you are not a minger at all

You don't look terrible, OP, just not very fashionable, but you have the same figure as me, and are the same age as me and I've managed to drag myself to somewhat stylish.

My tips are: clothes, go for natural fibres (cotton, wool) but in more contemporary shapes. That jumper is doing nothing for you, I prefer V- necks for this reason. I don't want to rehearse the skinnies/flared/wide legged debate, but I find wide-legged or flared M and S type bottoms look a bit more contemporary, I'd go there and see what people are wearing and what you can get. I use Vinted but you need a clear sense of direction online, and that can be easier to work out in a store.

Do you style your hair? Glasses? Gone grey?

It's the whole package, if you have nice skin, hair in great cut, and straight teeth, I think that's the basics in place and you can then worry about stuff on top like jewellery, nails and so on.

i'd also buy some nice jewellery of the Huggie type that you can leave all the time, with a neckace and a chain bracelet, just looks polished and is a very easy tweak.

You don't need to start wearing make up if you never have done before. I don't, never have and I am not a minger.

I would start by trying to identify the styles you like and more importantly, don't like before trying to change your style. You risk getting lots of things that don't work together if you don't have an overall view of what you'd like to look like. You could try to find people online that are a similar size, shape and age whose style you like and build from there.

A simple change for now would be to go for a more modern trouser shape, and a jumper/top that fits - that one looks too big and doesn't flatter you at all.

Your at home so do you need to be wafting around in something possibly glam and floaty . You look warm and relaxed .
What is it you envisage wearing at home ?
Perhaps you could try a dress with a gilet on top or a nice autumn skirt with a bright colour jumper etc . Maybe some more colour to your wardrobe .

I have some Uniqlo v necked jumpers, that with baggier straight legged trousers and trainers is more put together than going vastly away from what you feel comfortable in.

Hi OP,

First please never describe yourself as a minger - ever. Mustn't speak badly of oneself! It gives away power..

Re makeup, get the Laura Gellar palette and hopefully they will do the angled brush and the baked foundation all in one.

I say this because I have gone down to part time and my husband pays more than me, so I like you am at home and for a while I wondered, how dressed should I get every day??

But I got my routine sorted - wash or shower in the morning
Moisturiser - you use that?
Then the baked foundation, lightly, using a brush. It's a powder. just dust it on and it doesn't look overdone or too heavy (its for older women)
Then use the angled brush for some bronzer (yes it makes a difference)
Then the same angled brush for a bit of blusher high on the cheekbones
Mascara top and bottom - done

Face looks completely difference, not over done, just pretty and fresh - and appropriate to retain the interest of a hot husband - and just nice t catch sight of the self in the mirror and be pleased and confident.

Regarding clothes, go to a young woman's clothes store and buy two pairs of jeans in a modern shape - those ones in your photos needs to go out the door.

In fact ditch all clothes that you feel make you look frumpy.

I buy second hand cashmere online - that and a simple long sleeved T shirt from marks.

I also wear long dresses which I layer with my T shirts and and jumpers and wraps.

Why not also start a Pinterest page with ladies whose style you like?
Get hold of items one by one.

But ditch the worst offenders, and then you can never feel how they make you feel again.....

And never refer to yourself badly xxx
(want any help finding jumpers on Vinted?? I'm very very good at it!)

For chilling at home, I like starfish cotton yoga pants from lands end or halara straight leg pants with a boxy plain coloured sweatshirt over a vest and trainers.
For lunch with friends, I'd probably wear a blazer with smart dark jeans, a nice top and some loafers or boots.

thank you all for your replies. im sitting here having a wee chuckle to myself because i thought this was one of my better days being dressed lol. I've only just bought the jumper so you see what a disaster I am. I will take on board all the make up advice and head into town this weekend see what i can buy. Im a size 18 can ye recommend any online people to follow to see if i can get some inspo?

I like your shoes and trousers! Try tucking/folding the jumper under so it sits higher on your waist, and a white round neck tshirt really helps under any jumper as it brightens the face. I’m a home bird and can’t be bothered with make up on/off so use a moisturiser and then a tiny bit of benefit stain for my cheeks each day. Earrings, necklace and rings and that makes me feel like I’ve got armour on.
clean hair and tidy nails make a big difference too. Good luck op and tbh I’d choose comfort over anything now a days!!

OP, I think a Scandi style would work well for you, and you could lean into that with the trousers/shoes you already have, but you want to create flowing layers (so top, jumper showing top or cardi, large size, then cashmere scarf), plus some nice jewellery. I don't have anyone in mind but you can look for Scandi style brands or influencers/Pinterest and go from there.

Laura Gellar is online I think - it is for older women. I have worn lots of the better brands but this one really stands out and is SO easy - they put pictures on the back showing where each bit goes, which was really helpful to me.

Have fun!

The outfit is not very flattering and quite muddy colours, it’s also quite dated,

trouser style now is wide leg or straight, jumpers tend to be either fitted or slouchy and over sized.

howver the jumper could work well with a lovely pair of wide leg trousers, maybe in a rich wine colour, but I will be honest, it’s not good,

Im 61 and the worst part of my job is I cant glam up!

If i was in your shoes and wanted to start wearing some make up I would book in at decent make up counter and get advice. Maybe buy a product or two but get them to write down what they have used so you can Google dupes. Also look on YouTube /tik tok / inst for make up tutorial s for over 40s.
I love make up!

You jumper and trousers look great for a country walk but other have made some great suggestions.

Do you get your eyebrows done? Getting then threaded and waxed and tinted makes a huge difference. Ive gone to a mid brown as I've got older.
Eyelash tints are very good as well.

Fellow minger here 👋 still too fat to do anything about it but getting there.

For you I would do one of two things, trousers in either a much tighter (showing shape) leg or much wider (more fashionable) leg.

For tops, if you have the shape for it, I like the look of a loose(ish) fitting knit, but that pulls in a little at the bottom so that it sits nice on your hips. (Picture coming)

Another vote for Laura geller! You can usually get a good discount on the bundles that include the base foundation, blush and mascara

It’s hard to make much of an effort when you are either stuck in the house all day, or doing caring roles.
Have you tried M&S for clothes? They really have upped their game.

You don't need to start wearing make up if you never have done before.

Agree. And the jumper, trousers and shoes are terrible. No amount of "polished" hair, nails and makeup will make them look any better. They're clothes which serve the purpose of complying with the rules of decency and climate conditions but beyond that they do nothing.

@BitterHarvest i work from home myself too. A few changes recently

• Always brushing my hair fully
• A decent cut / no roots showing - use colour wow or root touch up
• Eyebrows threaded
• bit of jewellery
• Clean nails
• Lipstick
• Perfume
• More fitted clothes - i wear a blazer when on work calls, plus i have a ring light to make me look more polished
• Flattering clothes like wide legged trousers and a fitted top - try and balance things out
• M&S have really upped their game so worth trying them out

The best thing ive done though is use chat gpt to analyse a picture of myself. From that it pulled together several looks in my style for the school run and work. I even put in a few tops that i was struggling to style and it made them work.

The jumper is nice, the trousers ok and the clogs fine but the outfit doesn't work.

Bloody hell you need the hide of a rhino to ask for advice on here!