I look better in my head than I do in RL

[YellowHpok]

Is this common? Just back from a family do. I made an effort, looked nice. Cool even. Then family send me some pics and I realise I essentially look like my brother in a wig, which isn't the look I'm going for.

Not a single nice photo of me that matches how I perceived myself in the mirror. I don't think I'm a stunner by any means, but I was quote shocked at the disconnect.

Anyone else get this?

Yes, I do. My husband tells me that I just don't photograph well. Also nobody is casting as critical an eye as you are - it's an overall perception rather than specific attributes that others notice. I do find it jarring though, so I avoid photos where possible.

Of course! I look great in my head, half decent in the mirror and like an actual troll in other peoples photos....

It's just the way it is, isn't it?!

I always have beer goggles for myself

I don't photograph well. Whatever size or shape I am. I'm sure you look great OP!

If it makes you feel any better

same here, I photograph okay facially, but one reason I got so fat, I look at oics of me four stone lighter and don't look much different.

my face is quite young so if I lose weight, it will cave in like a souffle.

Totally 😁

Gosh, I’m so willowy and haughty looking in my imagination! In photos it’s very clear I reside beneath a bridge.

I have this. I look at other women my age and I think 'wow they look so old, I'm so glad I don't look like that'. And then I see a picture of myself and realise I do look that old!

Ha, I suffer from this too, I put my make up on and think, gorgeous. But nobody else seems to notice me. I have in the past been baffled when people don't notice me, ignore me, aren't attracted to me, ask me if I'm tired, vegan, post-op. But yet, I swear, I honestly don't have a high self-esteem. I genuinely seem to be in denial about how ordinary I look. I think I'm a little bit attractive. But I'm equidistant between pretty and ugly.

If you sub "willowy and haughty" for "pleasant and polished" then you might be a little closer.

So glad it's not just me. Don't get me wrong, I've no notions of being a stunner, but I thought I looked nicer than I did 😆

This is me too.
I think it's because photos are flat and small. So you see the whole thing. In the mirror I'm looking at the good bits, from a chosen angle. Maybe. It's a theory...

My problem is the picture I have in my head of myself is about ten years out of date 😬 so in my head I'm still slim and young looking. In real life/photos I've now got a big bum, chunky thighs, a significant mum tum and far more grey hair than I think. I try not to look at photos of me 😣

Don’t we all?! Story of my life really.

This is so disheartening, isn't it. I also only have one mirror that reflects what i see. And I'm the only one capable of taking my picture.

Totally identify with this. Photos of me are really dreadful, I look pasty, puffy and although I always wear makeup, it doesn’t seem to show on photos - looks like I’m not wearing any!

Yes!!! Totally this!

Yeah, that's me. Part of my issue is I look better face on than sideways. So when looking in the mirror I am seeing my best angle. Light reflects off the mirror, so it is as if I have filters on. And I smile a little to not scare myself. So I look almost ok.

In real life, I must look my age. In selfies, I want to die. In photos, the smaller the better.

I am not photogenic. The camera has the reverse effect on those who are.

Totally!

I look fab all done up and ready to go out
Then on the photos I look like Jabba the Hutt

Yes. So I just don't look closely in mirrors. In my head, I think I look great and I walk with confidence. But I really don't care if the reality is different - I am happy in my own skin!!! I don't photograph well, never did even in my heyday.

I'm always shocked how short I am, which is ridiculous.

Same here. Although someone got a picture of me at our Christmas party and I actually looked like I thought I looked. Needless to say it's now my Fb profile picture (but will prove useless if I ever go missing!).

I’ve always thought I’m nicer than I am!

Same here 🥴

A couple of years back DP took a photo of the DC on the swings and this hunchbacked elderly woman with a stripe of grey hair and a pot belly photobombed the picture. Yeah, it was me! I honestly thought I looked great that day in my casual summer skirt and vest top. Somebody should have told me ...

Yep me. Though basically my entire personality and capabilities are different in my head than real life