Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Style and beauty

Looking for style advice? Chat all about it here. For the latest discounts on fashion and beauty, sign up for Mumsnet Moneysaver emails.

I look better in my head than I do in RL

140 replies

YellowHpok · 27/12/2022 19:02

Is this common? Just back from a family do. I made an effort, looked nice. Cool even. Then family send me some pics and I realise I essentially look like my brother in a wig, which isn't the look I'm going for.

Not a single nice photo of me that matches how I perceived myself in the mirror. I don't think I'm a stunner by any means, but I was quote shocked at the disconnect.

Anyone else get this?

OP posts:
Blueblell · 27/12/2022 20:40

I think that is pretty much most people!

Somanymistakes · 27/12/2022 20:42

For those of you saying you look like your brother in a wig...

I look like my grandad. Not even my grandmother. My bloody grandad.

slideintomxas · 27/12/2022 20:43

So glad I found this thread. Resonates so much. We went out for a very special family meal last week and i spent ages (relatively speaking as normally I get 3minutes to myself) on my hair and makeup and thought (and felt!) I looked smoking. Every single photo was atrocious - my hairline seemed to have receded to such a degree that my “cool long fringe” looked like a combover, my face was shiny and fat instead of dewy luminous skin, my smokey eyes were tiny wrinkled slits and my flowy cool shirt looked like it was encasing a twin pregnancy. Thanks god none of the photos captured my legs in what I thought were leg lengthening coated jeans. I was so depressed I couldn’t share any of the photos.

Eixample · 27/12/2022 20:46

Being in pictures with your relatives makes you look worse. I look ok on my own but I look so similar to my siblings, male and female, that we just look ridiculous in a photo together.

SeasonsGreeeeetings · 27/12/2022 20:47

Funnywonder · 27/12/2022 19:26

A couple of years back DP took a photo of the DC on the swings and this hunchbacked elderly woman with a stripe of grey hair and a pot belly photobombed the picture. Yeah, it was me! I honestly thought I looked great that day in my casual summer skirt and vest top. Somebody should have told me ...

OMG you just made me laugh out LOUD! DP jumped! Thanks for the laughs ladies...and YES I have the same issue!!

HiyaCaath · 27/12/2022 20:49

Somanymistakes · 27/12/2022 20:42

For those of you saying you look like your brother in a wig...

I look like my grandad. Not even my grandmother. My bloody grandad.

😂

SeasonsGreeeeetings · 27/12/2022 20:49

OMG This thread! Pure laughs!!!!!!!

mondaytosunday · 27/12/2022 20:49

Ugh I thought maybe I just took a bad picture til a 'friend' said, about a particularly unflattering one, 'well that's what you look like'. Ouch!
I now look at the other people in the photos - if they look like I see them irl, I have to accept the photos must be fairly accurate for me too 😒.

EmmaAgain22 · 27/12/2022 20:49

Eixample · 27/12/2022 20:46

Being in pictures with your relatives makes you look worse. I look ok on my own but I look so similar to my siblings, male and female, that we just look ridiculous in a photo together.

Um...can't figure that one. Mum and sis and I look very similar...my issue is they look so nice and I don't! 😂

SeasonsGreeeeetings · 27/12/2022 20:49

HiyaCaath · 27/12/2022 20:49

😂

LOL!!!!!!!!

pictoosh · 27/12/2022 20:50

Brother in a wig...that's me too. I'm not especially fond of my brother and I hate that we look so alike, hate it. I see it in photos - striking resemblence. Gah!

Pleiades2020 · 27/12/2022 20:50

It's the photographer not the subject, plus difficult lighting conditions inside people's houses. Also remember your face is inverted in the mirror so you're used to seeing yourself the wrong way round.

HiyaCaath · 27/12/2022 20:51

My method is to not wear my glasses and live in an impressionistic world 🤣 that’ll do.

gigglinggirl · 27/12/2022 20:53

Best post I’ve read all day. This! I’m so pleased it’s not just me 😂

canesugar · 27/12/2022 20:53

Me. But it's good for my confidence so I'll go with it. My dad reminds me a photo doesn't lie though. Which makes me feel a bit rubbish but hey ho.

Ohchristmastreeohchristmastree · 27/12/2022 20:54

I don’t photograph well! Even my teenage daughters say I look better in real life than in photos, so you’re not alone.

Jackiebrambles · 27/12/2022 20:58

This thread has me snorting with laugher, thank you op! A burst sofa Grin

Jackiebrambles · 27/12/2022 20:59

I suffer from looking utter shit in both my mirror and photos!

LearnerCook · 27/12/2022 21:02

I'm so relieved to hear I'm not the only one to experience this! My husband tells me that I just don't photograph well but seeing pics of me is quite deflating.

OrangePomander · 27/12/2022 21:05

Same here. Also I have a very photogenic dh, but when he’s the photographer he somehow manages to make everyone look like out of proportion trolls.
I try and get one of the dcs to take photos whenever possible.

HelloTreacle9 · 27/12/2022 21:08

Totally. This is why I only really like selfies 😂

elgreco · 27/12/2022 21:08

I occasionally wonder who the bag lady reflected in shop windows is, sadly it's me!

rc22 · 27/12/2022 21:13

Somanymistakes · 27/12/2022 20:42

For those of you saying you look like your brother in a wig...

I look like my grandad. Not even my grandmother. My bloody grandad.

This is my problem I think. I really strongly resemble my dad so when I get all dressed up and do my make up, I just feel as though I look my dad in drag!!!

Nosecamera · 27/12/2022 21:13

I can't my head around how simply huge I look in photos, I've always been taller, but it's like now mother hood and middle age have worked their magic I am scaled up massively .
I feel like I should still look like a slightly quirky English beauty, but I actually look like an enormous, tired, lumpen woman with Noel Fielding's face.

faffadoodledo · 27/12/2022 21:13

This is one of my current preoccupations. Mum died this year and we found loads of absolutely beautiful (and stylish) photos of her to use for her slideshow. Stunning. Was so nice to be able to share them. Just wow.
Anyway, it got me thinking which photos my children would choose of me. And I'm suddenly concerned there really aren't many stunners!