Nutty Stepmum's Club (NSC) - Who Wants To Join Us?

[SadSam]

Howdy!!!! Squirrel 3 and I have decided that as we are a bit nutty, we'd like to set up the Nutty Stepmum's Club or NSC. If anyone would like to join us, please add to this post and prove that we are not the only nutters out there!

We would like to add a little bit more nuttyness to our already insane lives!!!!

Before they take you away I could do with some advice, I went shopping for a stunning outfit for a party and couldn't find anything that looked right on me. I'm a size 10/12 but I have size 34E boobs and nothing looks right and I don't think I've got time for a reduction before Saturday. What can I do?????

Hello!! I'm new! I've got 2 stepkids who are 15 and 12, and 4 boys of my own who are 6, 3 and 10 month old twins.

Just had a good laugh reading this thread, although have been a bit put off at the thought of yukky underwear!

I try to keep away from my SS's undergarments, which is easy enough as he doesn't like changing them anyway. Stinky disgusting boy!

Ooh, I have a joke as well!My favourite Star Trek joke! (The only joke I can remember)

How many ears does Spock have?
Three, a left ear, a right ear and a final front ear (final frontier, geddit???!!! )

pmsl Squirell havent had that with dss as yet. Id insist that he wash them out himself if I were you. I do with dss if I find anything grotty, fill the sink with water and washing power nad tell him to get on with it. wicked step mum that I am.

Welcome Vix4boys, you sound nutty enough to join our club!!

Sorry about the 'icky' underwear bit, but I'm glad you had fun reading the rest of it!!

Hello Tarantula, I'm very tempted to get him to wash them himself because they are all.....

Well, there.....

Don't quite know how to put this.......

Sorry for being so graphic, but they are all.....

Dry, crusty and stuck together!!!!!!!

Welcome to nutty land vix4boys!!!

Oh my god Squirrel - 34E?????????? That gives me back ache just thinking about it! lol

In M&S they have breast reduction bras that are supposed to be good...... not that I'd know only being a modest 36C. Alternatively, if you want to transport a cup size down the line to me your very welcome, ive always wanted to be a D cup!!!

Dresses that do look nice with big boobs are chinese dresses, the ones with the keyhole cut above the breast line. Very flattering and sexy!!

Hi Tarantula, great to see you again!

36c isn't smaqll, (sigh) I need a spel cheqer!!!

And oh yes a chinese dress would be fab but unfortunately they don't make boob sized clothes, I would have to get a size 16 to accomodate mine and it would be huge everywhere else.

Yeah Im not complaining, my DP says they are a perfect handful and when I say about getting implants to a D (only joking wouldnt really) he tells me that there is only so much he could fit in his mouth!!!! Lol

Sorry bit crude for this time on a Friday morning?

Do you know any dressmakers Squirrel? If so get a size 16 (it hurts I know) and get someone to take the rest of it in for you. Not an ideal solution but not sure what else to suggest, soz xxx

Yippie, God must be looking after me cos I ordered some clothes from my catolouge (not really expecting them to fit) but they arrived just now, tried them on and they only bloomimg fit don't they!!!!!!

Can't believe it, its a trouser suit (size 10 trouser and size 12 jacket) with a strappy, really sheer layered top underneath, looks lovely!

I'm a happy bunny now.

Think God must have felt sorry for me having to deal with the 'icky' boxers and smiled on me!!

Sorry size 14 jacket! But its really well cut so it seems to fit my lower half too.

Excellent news Squirrel, sorted!!!! Im off now, got to go on a 200 mile drive to pick up skids for weekend, wish me luck

Have a great party on Saturday Squirrel, knock em dead!!!!

Speak to you all on Monday nutters!! Loads a love xxx

Make sure you have your big knicks at the ready then, have a lovely weekend. x

thats great Squirrel You go out and knock em dead. Hope your drive aint too bad SS. Dp is off in a while to pick up dss. I hate him going as he takes dd with him and bm smokes like a trooper and the house is always full of smoke. At least she makes an effort not to smoke in front of dd by going into another room and cant really complain as it is her house but prefer if dd didnt have to spend much time round there esp as shes not too well atm.

IT'S THE WEEKEND.........

I love the weekend.

Hi to everyone. I'm feeling really sorry for myself as I don't have time at the moment to come here very often but it's lovely to see what you guys have been up to.

Have to tell you about my Yoga class. Went last night for the first time. Talk about nutty. Never in my life before have I had to get on all fours, stick my bum in the air and call myself a dog!! Very bizzare.

Actually reading that back, it does remind me of a time...

Me too, that's how we got dd.

(Cant' believe I just posted that!)

Now that made me laugh. It's great what you can get away with when your names surfermum or reflection..the hidden identity.

Hello girls,

The party was crap, well no, that's not true, I supose I should have enjoyed it but I had some bad news about my Grandfather, he's been in hospital and my Bitch of a Mother had a do not resusitate order put on him without disussing it with anyone else.

I told DP I didn't want to go, but he insisted saying that it would do me good to 'let my hair down'. Spent the whole evening checking my phone to make sure the hospital hadn't phoned. I gave up trying to enjoy myself after 2 1/2 hours and sneeked out and sat in the car, misserable cow that I am, DP got annoyed and is now not talking to me.

There was over a 100 people there and no-one noticed except DP's brother (who offered me a lift home), think DP's being unfair.

Now this party should have been fantastic all of the men were either Firemen, Builders or Policemen (not sure about the policemen being sexy, but its a uniform so what the hey!!!)

Maybe if they had all lined up and done 'the full monty'........

I believe in miracles, where you from? you sexy thing, you sexy thing you......

Morning nutters

Tarantula, hope everything went ok this weekend?

Reflection, great to see you back you nutty yogameister you! (and yeah I can relate to that position)

Squirrel, so sorry to hear about your grandad, thats very sad. Sorry party was crap too after all that looking for a nice outfit. As for Policeman, I can safely say they are as sexy as any guy in uniform Does sound like your DP was being a bit unfair in my honest opinion though!

We had kids this weekend and it was an absolute nightmare!!! ss8 whinged and whined most of the time and had a hissy fit if he didnt get his own way about anything, he kept hitting sd6 and making her cry all the time, it was awful. To be honest, I think ive decided that I dont want to go with DP anymore. It just depresses me. I have no say in disciplining them and DP lets them get away with murder. I mean afterall, what would you do if your skids stuck their middle finger up at you, at their gran, at their grandad, call their gran an ugly fat cow???? I wanted to slap their arses but I couldnt and DP said "stop it" but they just carried on and he let them!!!! Sheesh I give up!

Hello fellow nutters,

Where is everyone?

Sam, I'm sorry you had a bad weekend with Skids to be honest, in my opinion it sounds like your DP needs to 'take control' of the kids and disipline them more, being nasty to grandparents is not on.

I'm feeling very sad and I am having a bit of a tough time of it at the mo, and as this is suposed to be a cheery thread I am going to hand over the gaunlet of Chief Nutter back to you Sam. I'm sure 'normal' service will be resumed in a couple of weeks.

Go on, spread the nuttyness!!

Squirrel, see my other thread, im not really top hole myself at the moment, so any other takers for the gauntlet?

Ok, what about you tarantula?

I'll even start you off with a joke...

A husband and a wife were driving in the car one day after an argument when they drive past a farm with horses and cows and donkeys and pigs. The husband says to the wife, "relatives of yours?" "Yes," she says "inlaws!"

Oh dear really sorry to hear taht everyone is having a hard time. so sorry to hear about your granddad Squirrel and that you couldnt relax and enjoy the party. I know that I wouldnt have been able to either. Sorry to hear you had a bad w/e with the sks Sam, it sounds like a nightmare situation. Im so lucky that dp and bm have both always insisted that when dss is with us that both him and I are responsible for dss's behaviour. BM once said to me that we may not always agree on disipline but we can agree to back each other up and we try to (doesnt always work but at least we try).
I actually had a lovely weekend as we had a leaving drinks at work so I got home abit late on Friday (as dp says you cant refuse free booze). then for the rest of the weekend we jsut pottered round the house and garden, planted some veg and generally relaxed. Dss tried to make a cake for dp (cos hes the best dad in the world he said and the fact taht he loves baking and cakes had nothing to do with it at all) but it was a disadter cos dd turned te oven up too high the little minx. Dp was very brave tho and ate two slices he he

and the best bit was that dss's big brother came to pick him up in his car so no long train journey to take him home. fantastic