Attractive Au Pair making me feel jealous!

[MrsMopple]

It's very early days with the au pair - she arrived on Tuesday. She's young and attractive and ds seems to really like her. I am 31 weeks pregnant, grumpy, sleeping badly and 40. My ankles disappeared weeks ago and I feel unattractive.
Dh usually spends his evenings on the computer, leaving me to deal with ds, but he has become very interested in spending time playing with ds now that the au pair is here and spending time with ds. I'm feeling jealous and I hate it! (Not least because I'll be having a planned c section in a few weeks, leaving dh and au pair alone for as long as I'm in hospital for - last time it was a week.)
I'm tempted to tell dh how I'm feeling, but I imagine I'll just get told that I'm being paranoid and that he's just being friendly. And the irony is that I said I needed help for when the babies arrive and we settled on an au pair for cost reasons, so I imagine I'll get that thrown back at me, too.

Good Lord, no, not lines

< practices blank, wrinkle-free expression a la 19yo girlie so I can keep my husband.....>

Rani...I am quite chilled thanks. I am not the one viewing all other females with suspicion and frantically behaving like a dumb coquette transported from the 18th Century to keep my maaaan.

But yes, we can let it go, of course

Yeah Im sorry ranirani but I agree I think its ridiculous being that paranoid that you would do that. My husband has seen loads of my friends in their underwear when we have been getting ready at ours.

It doesnt bother me in the slightest, I cant understand why it would to anyone really its me hes with. I dont care if he thinks about sex with them either as I have fantasised about his attractive friends but I am not going to run off with them as no one compares to my husband.

hope OP is feeling good and good luck with birth

bump

Me too, rani

I think she is OK, though

I'm fine, thank you! I go through these odd phases of insecurity and being heavily pregnant and most definitely in a 'gone to seed' sort of way rather than a blooming one doesn't help.

DH was cheated on by a previous partner and so even if he were being flattered and flirted with by the au pair, I really don't think that he would act on it. I did raise the fact that I'm feeling a bit below par with him and he has been much better, so all is well for now.

But thanks for your concern!

ah, thought so

Don't you take all the blame though...it sounds like he has been acting the goat a bit !

am in the process of getting new au pair: would never go for a pretty one, sorry personal choice

Does the application form say "Pretty girls need not apply" ???

Discrimination, I call it

There should be a law against it! Prettyism

Pretty people get enough advantages in life, I'm sure they (as a group) can let go of a couple of au pair jobs

< hijack >

sec...I think you and I must hold the current MN award for " most diametrically opposed opinions"

I loves ya though

yay the sisterhood ! < ducks >

Funny you say that, Secunda - this thread had just got me wondering how much of this goes on? How often do pretty women not get the job, thanks to attitudes like the ones displayed here?

What the high number of antediluvian men still around, who believe a woman's intelligence runs in inverse proportion to her looks, and the high proportion of women who seem to assume pretty women cause "accidental penis insertion" (c:AF)- prettyism is starting to look like a genuine issue

MrsM, glad your common sense came to the fore! Good luck with the twins, and enjoy the help

I'd imagine it's more an issue with female employers

No, I think in general both men and women prefer good-looking people around them. I think sizeism is much more of an issue, people thinking that if you're fat it's because you've got no self-control and therefore won't be any good at work. I think there was some research done which showed that people felt goodlooking/well-groomed = more intelligent.

Grace..we have identified a real issue here

I think we should lobby parliament

Down with Prettyism!

You'll definitely get support in parliament - politicians love pretty girls. You could start with Paddy Ashdown (is he still an MP?)

I've always wondered why, instead of all these separate discrimination laws, we don't just have one that makes it illegal to discriminate against anybody on the basis of physical characteristics.
Nothing to do with this thread, though

Paddy Pantsdown ?

I had him last week !

All I had to do was play with his children, chat to him a bit, tell him he looked good for his age and bingo his penis was like a heat-seeking missile !

So your DH doesn't join in games with you and DS normally cos he is too busy with his computer?

Au pair arrives (attractive or not) and he's being super dad???

What a shame for you and DS When she leaves will he ignore you, DS and the new babies do you think?

OMG agal, kust leave poor MrsM alone she is PG for Christs sake and had few moments of self doubt, thats all

You had him? Fair play

He was pretty hot about 10 years ago.

He is a natural ginger

oho.

He is one of my embarrassng crushes