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Would you message him after a lovely holiday connection went quiet?

513 replies

BigSpongyHelmet · Yesterday 14:04

Name changed obviously as I feel really pathetic.

Recently returned from a solo holiday, met a really lovely man on the Thursday evening (I went home the following Saturday), whilst watching a live band and we chatted for hours about everything and anything. It all felt really natural, he was a little shy but we had a lovely time and I felt comfortable when he offered to walk me back (near to) my apartment. I'd had a few drinks as had he and he asked if I wanted to link arms as I seemed a little unsteady...I probably was to be fair, I was merry but as I don't drink often, it probably takes me much less to get tipsy than others!

Anyhoo, the walk back was 20 mins, in that time we went from linked arms to holding hands, chatted all the way about our jobs, friends, holidays, the fact that we were both single, and ended up sitting on a bench near the apartment until 4.00 a.m. just chatting. It was so lovely. The next morning he messaged me saying he'd had a lovely time and could he see me again, we decided to go and see a singer we'd both talked about the night before, so I met him at 4.30 in a seafront bar, had a couple of cocktails, saw the singer at 6.30 and then he asked if he could buy me dinner. Ended up at the same bar as the night before watching the live band again, didn't stop chatting and laughing and we also had a couple of snogs (discretely, it was very dark). He walked me back again, took a bit longer this time as we were constantly stopping for a kiss, he was a gentlemen, didn't try anything else, walked me to my door, bit more kissing, said he'd love to see when he gets home and then he said he better let me go as I was leaving for the airport at 9 the next day.

He messaged me whilst I was at the airport, said how lovely it had been to meet me and he really wanted to see me again and he'd message/call me when he got home (he was there until Thursday last week). I responded to say I'd really enjoyed meeting him and I'd love to see him again....and then nothing. And still nothing.

I have to say this has really hit me hard and I'm almost embarrassed to admit that, I really liked him and I honestly thought he would get in touch. My friends are in 2 camps, some have said message him (mostly blokes), some have said you messaged last, you made your feelings clear and he DID say he'd message you once home. I have stopped myself from messaging him so many times as I don't want to feel like I'm prompting him, but I would have really liked to see him again. It could have been all bullshit on holiday but then why text me when I'm on my way home.

We're both 52 for context.

WWYD?

OP posts:
BigSpongyHelmet · Yesterday 18:52

Imonmyownhere · Yesterday 18:46

I'm holding in a poo waiting for this.

You can let it go now

OP posts:
Mls1984btc · Yesterday 18:52

Congratulations @BigSpongyHelmet 🥳

PinkEasterbunny · Yesterday 18:52

YAY - top news OP! xx

SeptemberSun01 · Yesterday 18:53

Yay you could meet him tomorrow!

MegJoBethandAmytoo · Yesterday 18:53

Imonmyownhere · Yesterday 18:46

I'm holding in a poo waiting for this.

Grim

CillianMurphyhasbeautifuleyes · Yesterday 18:54

Yay! 🎉

cannynotsay · Yesterday 18:54

Has he responded this thread is so long I need an update haha

Imonmyownhere · Yesterday 18:55

BigSpongyHelmet · Yesterday 18:52

You can let it go now

Wasn't really just wanted you to hurry up!! Great news 😝Funny you got the wrong week, hope you still fancy him sober!!

TheEdgyMoose · Yesterday 18:55

JustWalnut · Yesterday 15:38

Oh dear. I was going to tell you to have some self respect and do not message him but too late.
He will definitely have been snogging someone else, probably several someones, during the rest of his holiday.

Self respect? She was talking about sending a text message, not turning up on his doorstep in only a fur coat!!

Love your update OP! Be sure to report back when you have met up again. Hope you have a lovely time.

KidsDoBetter · Yesterday 18:55

Yay!!!

Kind of. Just be sure he’s proactive from now on.

I get that he might not be a texter but I’d have expected an interim text (given you texted last). Esp given he was on holiday and that’s where you met.

Make sure hes the one driving the organising / fixing a date etc. And don’t me going to his city. Half way as a minimum ….

Nic8989 · Yesterday 18:55

Really chuffed for you Op 🤩
hope this is the start of something good for you 🤞🏻

ANNotherWriter · Yesterday 18:56

That's good news OP.

This is just me @BigSpongyHelmet but for reassurance I'd be checking flight arrivals at the airport. You know which one, presumably (Leeds) and his location (the Canary Island) to see if a plane landed around the time you messaged him.

MsPrufrockk · Yesterday 18:58

BigSpongyHelmet · Yesterday 17:41

Ha, it's a current thread name on the sex board which i read just before I started mine

Edited

Omg this made me howl, I'm off to read the sex board.

Just reading your thread a few hours after you messaged him, keeping my fingers crossed you get a response (if you haven't already!), and if not, meh, his loss!

bananaobama · Yesterday 18:58

Well done for messaging!

let us know when you get a date booked in

bananaobama · Yesterday 18:59

As soon as you get his surname, google it.

SallyAnnDrivesACar · Yesterday 18:59

That's brilliant OP!!

Unexpectedlysinglemum · Yesterday 19:01

I’d put money on him having a wife or gf

EffinMagicFairy · Yesterday 19:01

Great news 🤗

Nevs · Yesterday 19:02

ANNotherWriter · Yesterday 18:56

That's good news OP.

This is just me @BigSpongyHelmet but for reassurance I'd be checking flight arrivals at the airport. You know which one, presumably (Leeds) and his location (the Canary Island) to see if a plane landed around the time you messaged him.

Edited

Yeah I’d want to know if he was being truthful about the flights because pursuing further. It’s a bit unlikely the OP would confuse Monday for the previous Thursday, regardless if there was alcohol involved.

ANNotherWriter · Yesterday 19:03

What flight was he on from which Canary Island? Leeds airport?

Had a quick look and nothing showing this afternoon from any Canary Island at Leeds.

(I could be wrong - maybe it's not Leeds - but arrivals are listed from around 11am today.)

If he flew into Manchester etc, check it out.

CombatBarbie · Yesterday 19:05

ANNotherWriter · Yesterday 19:03

What flight was he on from which Canary Island? Leeds airport?

Had a quick look and nothing showing this afternoon from any Canary Island at Leeds.

(I could be wrong - maybe it's not Leeds - but arrivals are listed from around 11am today.)

If he flew into Manchester etc, check it out.

Edited

Seriously?? He could have flown to Manchester or anywhere......why did you even check 🤔

BigSpongyHelmet · Yesterday 19:06

Rightly or wrongly I'm taking it at face value, I'm not going to search flights or jump straight on social media. He's happy to come to Manchester and book a hotel, and is going to come back to me with dates

OP posts:
ANNotherWriter · Yesterday 19:06

CombatBarbie · Yesterday 19:05

Seriously?? He could have flown to Manchester or anywhere......why did you even check 🤔

Surely it's obvious why anyone would check?

You can't take everyone at their word.

Thursday sounds nothing like Monday.

ANNotherWriter · Yesterday 19:07

BigSpongyHelmet · Yesterday 19:06

Rightly or wrongly I'm taking it at face value, I'm not going to search flights or jump straight on social media. He's happy to come to Manchester and book a hotel, and is going to come back to me with dates

I'd be checking. Surely it will only give you reassurance if he's genuine?

But- your choice.

BigSpongyHelmet · Yesterday 19:08

And no, he didn't fly to Leeds...or Manchester, hence the train

OP posts: