Partners staying over

[StarClouds]

If you have your children full time and started dating again at what point did you feel comfortable having them over when your kids are in bed? Im thinking around 6 months?

Some strange comments, if you believe we are the same then report it to mumsnet and they will tell you that we are not, seems you just can’t handle not everyone agrees with you.

we DO meet when the kids are at school but you can’t have a long term relationship that way.

Can you explain the advantages and difference of spending a few hours getting to know someone whilst the kids are at school from spending a few hours getting to know someone whilst the kids are in bed?

Because time is limited during the day I thought that would be obvious.

How on earth would it be obvious? You haven’t mentioned what job you both do or the hours?

Well school hours are limited and most adult grown ups want to spend an evening together!

🤣🤣🤣🤣 do you think parents dont have sex when their kids are in the house? No all you women become nuns when you have children 😂🤣

Sad isn’t it? I’m glad I don’t live in OP’s world. Even if that means I’m an uptight, asexual nun 😂.

If it's just for a night time visit while kids asleep and gone long before wake up do you even need to wait 6 months?
I wouldn't want to be asleep/unaware while kids asleep and man around though so politely kick out after

Wouldn’t fancy being part of your world either being honest .
Zero need for you to speak to OP the way you are .
She has not been nasty to anyone on this thread .

Yeah, because those are the only two options. Are you generally a bit thick or are you just being deliberately obtuse to annoy people?

Two parents of the same child having sex in the home they both share with their children, and who I would presume the children have met is not the same thing as bringing some random bloke home for a shag and sneaking him out before the kids wake.

The fact you can’t see that makes me sad for your kids.

I had a perfectly good sex life when I was in a relationship, but funnily enough I didn’t need to bring randoms home to do it - my DD was always my priority over dating and so I worked around my circumstances as a single parent.

You can be a single/lone parent and have a relationship that includes a sex life, but you just don’t need to risk your children’s safety or comfort to do so.

Can’t believe I’m actually having to explain this to a supposed adult.

You have very strange black and white thinking op which is actually hindering your enjoyment of life. There is objectively absolutely no difference from spending 6 hours together from 9am - 3pm than 6 hours from 8pm-2am. Or whatever works for you, which you won’t detail and we’ll be expected to magically know. Once you actually know this bloke, and you do not yet, then of course switch to the evening if that works for you. Until then, you’re frankly just being silly.

If you don’t know the difference between mum and dad shagging and mum and a complete stranger to the children shagging, then no one can help you op.

She’s not been nasty to anyone? She’s called everyone who disagrees with her “uptight asexual nuns” simply because we said there is no need to bring a guy she barely knows to her house when her kids are asleep.

People have suggested perfectly valid ways of dating, but she’s just rude to everyone who doesn’t say what she wants to hear. Not sure why she posted, really.

Apparently even 6 months is too soon!

I don’t have 6 hours free during the day!

You haven’t suggested ways to date you’ve suggested ways to have a fbuddy, thats not what I’m looking for, a relationship cant progress if you only ever see each other 2 hours during day time, we have been seeing each other for a while now, how do you think things move on to the next step?

good grief, chill

If a serial killer intend on murdering an entire family, they won't wait for an invitation anyway.

While kids might find it very weird and awkward to wake up one night to find a complete stranger on the sofa with their mum, she's not inviting a known criminal in the place. 😂

Your neighbour or your childhood friend might be a serial killer and no one knows about it (yet) and you still invite them around. Your kids are more in danger from crazy motorists than anything else, you know that?

Why would an uptight, asexual nun suggest finding a fuck buddy? Make your mind up.

Plenty of us have suggested ways to date that fit in with being a lone parent. You just don’t like them, which is fine and you’ll clearly do what you want anyway.

school hours only, yeah great tell me how you see that relationship progressing?

Hysterical 😂

Oh goodness, silly me, I should have looked in my crystal ball for that info.

op - you asked how lone parents managed it. You provided zero info about why you can’t or any specifics about ages of children etc Posters helpfully came up with ideas on how you can manage it without putting your children at risk. There are plenty. You attempted to ridicule and deride every single poster who came up with a suggestion that didn’t work for you, despite the poster having no way of knowing that for a reason you had yet to disclose, that perfectly normal suggestion wouldn’t work.

im not beign hysterical. 17% of women who had a stepfather as a main figure in their childhood experienced sexual abuse by him, compared to 2% for biological fathers.

You are being extremely hysterical, I had a step father when I was younger and he was wonderful, much better than my own father, anyway who said anything about step father, hes coming round for the evening im not moving him in!