I have ONE fucking thing a week I do for myself and dh repeatedly lets me down by being late home

[CountessDracula]

and tonight "he forgot"

I have been so supportive to him lately and he can't even be fucked to think of me

This is becoming a pattern
I am beginning to think he is a selfish cunt who doesn't give a shit about anyone but himself.

In fact I have thought it for a while

He is compounding it with repeated selfish behaviour

I never let him down
never

WE do most things 50/50 0 he does cards and presents for his family, me, mine. I can trust him to buy birthday presents for other children (especially now the boys are at the Argos catalogue stage of materialistic greed), turn up on time if I have to be out, etc etc.However the one time I let him choose (i.e, in my book facilitate DS to choose the RIGHT shoes) DS's shoes from the orthotics catalogue, DS ended up in purple piedro boots with a shiny purple mock croc panel.

This is key I think - they have to be the one to deal with the shit if they forget something. That's how people learn. So if they forget Healthy Lunch Day or Book Costume day, they get to deal with disappointed child or apologise to the teacher or whatever.

And if the child needs fillings, aged 4, from slack parental (i.e. DP) approach to teeth cleaning, the slack parent gets to take child to dentist. etc.

He did say last night (which I conceded) that he wants to please me so he gives unrealistic estimates of when he might be able to be home and then can't make them

that is dh down to a tee - well it was until he set up his own businessna d worked next door!!!

Aha MI has the answer

I need to take up sotpeeing

google thinks you mean sauteeing
do you?

Fennel - Agree. They have to feel the consequences. Sadly though, it is often the DCs that feel the consequences - the only child in uniform on a "no uniform day".

WHYWHYWHWY
do oyu take pe kit hoem every day

She meant "Stopping" as in stopping sending cards for her dh

Did we ever get to the bottom of what CD was going to do with her me-time?

I think I will sotpee too.

(Is it expensive/painful?)

i was enrolling in a Sotpee class if you must know

In French it is sotpéé and you can buy it in Bon Marche.

Apparently the Germans do this naked and it is called "sottenpayensich(ing)" and involves lipstick.

Oh
I hope I am doing the Danish version

What is sotpee?

Danish version.

Ah.

Sotpee bacon classes.

LadyMuck - I think it's Morris Dancing.

Well I was starting to wonder whether we would get to the end of this and then discover that actually CD was heading to the SW London middle-aged lesbian swingers club, and that there was method to her dh's madness.

you need to redress the balance in your relationship somehow

Just disappear without notice for a midweek spa break and leave him holding baby on Monday morning

Don't tell him where you have gone, just unpredictably fail to return to the house on Sunday evening & text him that you are on a spa break, not sure when you might return - do not give away location or answer any texts from dh

If I sotpeed, I fear the kitchen would disappear under a mountain of washing up..........................

n. sotpee. Lesser known North American tent. Commonly pitched next to a teepee. Where the drinking was done. Hence sot - drunk, in English.

So, CD was really going to the pub ...

God I empathise, DH does this too me.

I have ONE evening when I have a fixed apt. I arranged it for post DS bedtime and a good hr after the normal time DH is home from work. Consistantly he is late or informs me at the last minute that he has to work away from home that night.

I find it bloody incredible that prior to this night out of mine he NEVER worked late that night and now he does 2 weeks a month.

I also get really annoyed when he informs me at the last minute - its like I'm the least important thing in his life.

(Ok I'm being unreasonable as DH tells me, his job requires occasional working in london and of course he has NO control whatsoever over his diary so other people book him into trips to london at the last minute)