ASMR am I allowed to be upset?

[Sunnyday410]

Good afternoon
I am looking for some prospective please.
I dont know if I am being irrational.
I have been with my boyfriend for 3 years live together ect.
I know he used to listen to Asmr before we met, I found out today he has still been listening to it. I didn't know. It is a woman talking and whispering one title was "tingles all over your head".
He works nights so we dont always sleep together. When I found out I was and still am so upset. I know it is my feelings but I cant help it. I know people have made it sexual. I think in this case it is purely for relaxation.
It has sent me on a major spiral. Please calm me down. I feel so unwanted and hurt.

Why cant he get that from me

Why cant he get that from me

There are very few people who can trigger the ASMR response, I've encountered about two in my whole life and one was a random girl at school that I just heard talking one day. There really aren't many people who can do it, it's an art.

Maybe try it, whisper in his ear tonight ‘I am right here just relax’ and make some weird mouth noises

I had to look this up as I had no idea what it was.

I don't understand how I cant be upset. Please help me understand, this is so intimate I posted the link

Are you prepared to whisper to him and click hypnotically on a loop for hours?

Sorry OP, I can't stand to listen to more than about ten seconds of that, I actually hate ASMR; all the whispering and breathing and knocking things leaves me weirdly cold.

Would you object if she was a pop singer and these were just lyrics about her asking the listener to let her stay over? Because that's essentially what it is.

That asmr is a bit weird. It did nothing for me. I found the whispering quite silly and irritating. Maybd this guy isn't the right one for you but I don't think he's doing anything wrong.

It seems a bit creepy, to be honest.

Do you even know what ASMR is?

No one’s talking to him.

How is this different to listening to a meditation podcast?

Have you spoken to him about it?

The award for the funniest post of the week goes to 👆🏻

I'd never heard of it before. Clicked 'off' after a few seconds. That's a 'Nope'.

That’s not sexual, it’s just really bloody creepy.

Rustling paper might help with the noises.

@SilenceLaySteadily

I came onto the thread to say 'get a grip' as I love a bit of asmr but actually after watching that clip, it is a bit onlyfans without the nudity.

I listen to asmr, certain sounds give me physical sensations and I was thrilled to find whole videos devoted to it years ago! If dh got upset because I was listening to something relaxing in bed I would consider it an indication I probably needed to leave him and his weird jealously tbh...

You are being absurd, I listen to a woman with make up brushes and head tingles..... I am so far away from being gay!

Men also do AMSR

No it isn’t

So if he goes to a yoga or meditation class and it's a woman instructor you'd consider that cheating? I'm sorry, but that (and this) is incredibly controlling and I think your boyfriend deserves better. You need to do some work on this.

Urgh. This is horrendous.

Honestly - i love asmr and listen to loads of it. My son listens to it too so i am all for it and was going to say OP was overreacting.

I would hate this one - it does to me (not to you - that's ok too) sound a bit 'come to me big boy'. 😳