Fairly sure my husband is cheating with an elf. Unfortunately seriously.

[Deidretheelf]

Can someone tell me where therese monstrosities came from. (More pics to come).

Underneath and around my bed was an incredible mess and I gave it a good clean out. And at the bottom, far too clean, undusty and uncreased to have been there for more than a few days was this horrendous sexy elf outfit. I asked my husband about it and he said he’d bought it for me last year, and I’d forgotten about it.

I accepted this, thought it just got shoved in an odd corner. I’m never in a million years wear it. Then this happened….

@JingleSnowmanTree I can see it too... looks like fresh spunk on the right vs dried on the left... 🤢

If this is serious and you think your husband is buying clothes for prostitutes while bankrupting the family then of course you need to tell him to leave.

Maybe the OP normally has some green bunting above the bed and so on first glance thought the bunting had fallen down and wrapped itself around the bed post..... (I'm trying to help @Deidretheelf out here 😂)

The knickers are a thong - they'd have been up the wearer's arse crack.

I wonder if the op has ever posted on one of the. ' how often do you wash your sheets' threads

🙄

He doesn’t have a thing for elves?

Thats the wankslipper suggestion for next Christmas up the swanny then…

It's ok op, saint Knickerless has been visiting - your dh had just got a thing for benevolent men with white beards in green nighties who like to deposit oranges in stockings.

Hi folks

We're popping in to say that we've spoken to this user and we now have no reason to believe that this thread isn't genuine. It is the internet and we can never vouch for someone completely so please bear this in mind.

Please do not troll hunt - it is against talk guidelines and can result in suspensions.

Oh my goodness this is getting weirder! 😳

Right OP.

As others have said, your sheets need attention. Persil. Normal wash with biological then a scaldy one. Then when you’ve made your nice clean bed - please god you’ve a mattress protector - don’t let him back in it.

Burn the elf shite. He may have been entertaining, he may be caressing his inner elf on the sly and needs a visual.

Either way, you keep him at bay until he is honest with you.

Get some dettol on your bedpost. Those drawers have been places your head doesn’t need to be near.

And consider going to the clinic.

He may have taken more home than green polyester and faux fur.

www.ebay.co.uk/itm/165434659065

Even if this load of tosh is true, anyone that claims that a cheapo £9.99 piece of tat is a gift for his wife needs binning immediately.

Till a few days ago Elf was my favourite ever Christmas movie. I’ll never see Buddy in the same light again. OP you’ve tainted my Christmas memories.

But why didn't you notice the bed knickers before??

Aww @Jitterybugs 🥲

I just don't understand what's happened here. Did you find the thong at the same time as the dress? Why would they be left there so obviously?

Ah you jumped the shark a bit here OP.

I don't think I've ever hung my knickers from the bed post while in the throws of passion.

Next time, tell him you’ll feel more festive if you get a Hermes Birkin bag on your bedpost.

Meanwhile, don’t light any relaxing candles or whatever. That material will not fare well.

@Deidretheelf, since you just discovered the thong, are you surmising that his ‘encounter’ occurred today while you were out of the house?

WTAF?

Merry Christmas. Please take arcane's sage laundry advice. Those sheets, mattress protector and pillows need attention. Pronto. Then you. Your nearest clinic. I'd be inclined to wash down the walls with Dettol, but see how you go.

So many questions! Do you live together? When did you notice the thong? How has he been sneaking prostitutes into the house? Why don't you wash your sheets?

The bedpost has had some activity, hasn't it? A bit of Pollyfilla will sort that.