Fairly sure my husband is cheating with an elf. Unfortunately seriously.

[Deidretheelf]

Can someone tell me where therese monstrosities came from. (More pics to come).

Underneath and around my bed was an incredible mess and I gave it a good clean out. And at the bottom, far too clean, undusty and uncreased to have been there for more than a few days was this horrendous sexy elf outfit. I asked my husband about it and he said he’d bought it for me last year, and I’d forgotten about it.

I accepted this, thought it just got shoved in an odd corner. I’m never in a million years wear it. Then this happened….

Bit bored tonight OP? Try harder

If you know he is spending all the family money on prostitutes, why are you not divorcing him.

Have you got nothing better to do than start a fake thread?

Perhaps your New Year’s resolution would be to get a life.

WTH?

You haven't answered the question about not noticing the thong on your bedpost, Deirdre.

Pull the other one it’s got (sleigh) bells on 🤣

Blimey, I can ignore and 'not see' piles of mess and random objects in my house, but even I think I'd notice elf knickers on the bed post 😂😂 how have you not seen them before now? Do you think he's been at it with the elf this morning?

I think you need to chuck everything in the bin, including your bed. It's all contaminated now.

So you’ve been going to sleep in that bed every night and haven’t noticed the knickers hanging on the bed head before today?

I don’t think it would have stayed on long enough to pick up a smell. And those knickers really are a string so could end up on one side or the other picking up no smell. There are signs of wear, like it’s been work before, loose stitches and one of the feather decorations is detached mostly from the dress. It looks like it might have been worn before and washed because I didn’t notice any smell.

Yes, it's not exactly a branch of mistletoe.

Not a stain, that’s a label, it’s see through.

Elvish Presley -your cheatin’ heart springs to mind.

Get him kicked out of your gnhome pronto.

*...matching knickers wrapped around the bed post.

Now that doesn’t happen by accident, it happens when you’re having sex.*

Not when I'm having sex, it doesn't.

?? You didn’t notice a random thong hanging from your bedpost?, @Deidretheelf ?!

Cool story.....next.

There no way that dress (or bedsheet) has been washed

That's the one question she can't answer.....

If he has been getting sex workers to dress up like this and tying them to the bed, then it is clearly an Elfin Safety issue. I'll bet he snorts pixie dust out of their navels and all.

Knickerless Knickleby!

I've an elfy amount of suspicion about this thread...

It's not really an elf costume, though is it?
More like a horrible nylon nightie in an ugly shade of green.
Relax. He doesn't have a thing for elves..

To be fair, the OP doesn't seem especially house-proud....

Something fishy is going on here...

You should get some elf-confidence and leave him OP