Dating Thread 242 - Mid-Summer daters

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The Rules:

1.The first rule about the dating thread is don't talk about it with people you're dating.

1. Develop a thick skin.
2. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
3. It's all BS until it actually happens.
4. Trust your gut instinct.
5. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
6. Know your worth.
7. If it's not fun, stop.
8. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread. 11. Treat others as you'd like to be treated 12. Any relationship you have that could get ruined by having a conversation about your feelings, standards and/or expectations wasn't really stable enough to begin with 13. The things you choose to ignore/ tolerate now are the reasons you will break up in the future 14. OLD can get very time consuming. Keep doing other activities you enjoy.

Optional: Please give your irons (potential dates you are talking to) nicknames like Mr Scottish. Initials are allowed (Mr S) when you are an item

He doesn't have blue ticks switched on, so no way to know if he read my messages.
Last seen is also turned off.
But I'm not blocked because I can still see his profile pic and his name.

No idea what happened.

NellyTheCake
delete
begone

who knows why , myriad reasons and my bet is usually anxiety and a messed up head

Bloody hell mate, did get your 600quid back & getting dumped on holiday ( that you paid for), that’s really rough, I know this is a 99% female site, but women are far from perfect sometimes

I don’t know, but we exchanged a couple of messages, (I had deleted her number & chat, so it was a bit weird so see these messages on WA from her ) I ask how she was , the response was “Ofstead are coming in , really stressed out “, so you are probably right about the stress thing and her response was to bail out on me

You shouldn't double text- he got the first one and trust me someone who is keen doesn't need to be reminded.
I was sweet, polite and always gave the benefit of the doubt when I started OLD, because I could not understand poor manners and vile behaviour. But gosh I toughened up along the way.

@NoDatingFor0ldMen Of course(some) women are flakey, users etc. The majority of people on this thread are women dating men so there will be a generalisation of recurring behaviours. It's not women against men.

@NoDatingFor0ldMen

No I just chalked it up to experience, she did tell me one of my many good quality’s was my attitude to money in a relationship!

I’m getting really good vibes from Mr Beard. Second date booked but not until a week on Friday as we’re both busy until then. Lots of fun chatty messages though.

Last night's date reappeared this morning. Full of apologies. And with a very plausible reason for not getting in touch.

I can't repeat it here as it would be outing. But I believe him. No one would come up with this excuse.

We've rearranged for later this week. He offered to buy dinner as an apology but I prefer to stick to a first date drink only. So he's bringing me a present from his work instead, which is something inexpensive but very thoughtful.

@NellyTheCake I’m glad he’s been in touch. Good luck for the date!

@NellyTheCake

That's great news. Really hoping it goes well and he was worth the wait

MumLass SamW98
Thanks! I will post an update after my date.

Hello... I've got a 2nd date tonight. Been back on the apps for about a month after having 2 months off. Met a lovely guy for first date on Sunday, drink in a local pub. My first date since June. He is so nice. We matched on Hinge Saturday night and seem to have clicked.
Getting ready to go and play crazy golf tonight. And Saturday we're watching a rugby match.
I'm going to call him Mr Rugby.
I have been so picky this time round and not taken any BS from anyone... hopefully it pays off!

Thewildthingsliveatmyhouse
ahhhh 🥰

I've just been told off... Matched with a man, I just sent 'hi Would you like to chat?' & he said 'Hey.x' so I said 'Seems like we are nearby'

& he said 'You are so blunt, no kisses, now how are you, very abrupt, no feeling'.

Whoops!

Oh wow, what a weirdo! I answered the above message with 'Sorry, it's hard to know how to chat on here isn't it'

Then I get 'U got WhatsApp?' So I said 'Now THAT'S blunt' & unmatched him.

Thewildthingsliveatmyhouse Lovely update

NervesOfCotton
Total weirdo!! Lucky escape there.
Why would you need to put kisses when you've only just started messaging?

Thewildthingsliveatmyhouse
Hope your 2nd date goes well. Sounds lovely.

NellyTheCake Bizarre isn't it! The men I speak to on Bumble are so strange, they are always telling me that I'm forward or whatever, when on the other dating site I'm on, it's just normal chat!

@NervesOfCotton Ha ha that’s a brilliant message exchange 🤣.

I never put kisses on any communication other than my children, and that’s only at the end of a conversation or if they’ve just lent me money or something like that 😁.

@NervesOfCotton

OMG what a strange man. OLD really does show you how different peoples communication styles are. But that’s a new one on me - getting called for not putting a x - odd!!

Im taking a bit of time out from it at mo. I’m off to Santorini for a week and it’s perfect timing. I need to clear Mr GA from my head before I start chatting to anyone else.

So I’ve got my holiday then I’m at a soul music weekend mid October so after that I’ll dip my toe back in.

GoingToBeLessRubbishAtLife He had one of those statements about 'I have some great friends who are important to me'... Well let's hope none of them ever forgets the X on the end of a message

SamW I just attract the strange ones I hope you have a lovely time, the soul weekend sounds amazing! I'm totally jealous

On a different note, I got chatting to another one, we chatted the rest of the evening & it was just easy, we found we like the same music & films & some hobbies, so we were just bouncing off each other kind of thing. My slight reservation is he has a 3 year old. My youngest is 6 & I've never wanted to date anybody with younger than mine before, it's not a deal breaker I just feel slightly hesitant about it.

Does it bother anybody else, kids slightly younger than your own, or am I just being fussy?!

He signed off with 'Thank you for the chat lovely, I've really enjoyed it, you can message me anytime you like tomorrow & I'll reply. Sweet dreams.x' (First time he's put a kiss & I didn't tell him off about it)

@NervesOfCotton

Thank you. I’ve been doing the soul weekends on and off since the late 80’s. Still do a couple a year but the proper ones not the cheesy ‘adults weekends’ type.

Thats where I met most of my circle of friends so for me and others my age, the soul scene is a brilliant way to restart your social life after divorce.

You never know maybe I’ll do a Shirley Valentine and meet an Adonis in Greece 🤣

SamW It sounds great, I don't have much of a social life right now, need to find some single friends or some friends who aren't single but aren't surgically attached to their men

Can anyone explain Bumble pricing to me? Too much going on to work it out. I joined, then signed up to Premium for a week. I’ve messaged one guy (Ongoing)

I’ve let Premium lapse after a week as it’s so expensive. Just been back on and now I can only see one other person, plus the guy I messaged. Wondering what the point is in the basic sub? Can you just see one person at a time in the stack thing?

FallenFigs You can swipe & see everybody but you can only swipe Right on (I think) 25 people every 24 hours, you won't be able to see who has 'liked' you unless you 'Swipe right' on those people too.

Is that what you mean by the stacked thing?

When I went from paying to free the difference was being able to see who had 'liked' me & being able to swipe Right on as many as I liked. (I'm now back paying for it as, although it's expensive, I just prefer it)

Jeez, The no kisses thing is lame, but also think that “Hi, would you like to chat”, is a bit blunt, but then I have been told off for not being direct enough, or I’m just old