Are all guys cheats given the opportunity?! Rant.

[Buttercups3926]

I had to go away for a conference last week where various offices from across the country got together for a party. Around 100 people attended with the average ages being around 24-40. Let's say it was 50 men and 50 women.... Most of the men there were married/children/serious relationships. There was lots of drink involved. 2 different men tried it on with me at various stages of the evening. A 40 year old with a wife (one child and his wife is expecting in a few weeks), and 27 year old who I've just Facebook stalked and he's in a 10 year relationship.

I mean this isn't all men. It's not even 10% of the crowd. But for some reason it's really got my back up.... rant over.

experiences anyone?

Agree, instinctive

Having worked with men a lot over the years, away from home for prolonged periods, 30% went looking for it, 40% would if it was offered and the rest didn’t cheat.

Fair enough

I have been to dozens of conferences (STEM) and never experienced this

I agree. In my experience. I think the pathological cheats are the ones who would do it anywhere.

The opportunistic ones are the ones to watch ( and the majority of men). I find it odd people think a cheat is a cheat wherever you are. I do t think this is true. For some, yes. For other, culture, drink, travel, stag nights, work mates, proactive approach from a woman.... all sorts... will mean dishonour.

I completely agree with this percentage. I couldn't cope with a "traveller" nowadays. Call that controlling but I've seen the evidence first hand.

Wasn't there a post almost exactly like this one a few weeks back?

The 'experiences anyone?' after the short story makes me think it's a reporter trying to gather stories in stealth mode. They seem to have learnt that simply asking a question without a backstory makes people suspicious so their posts have evolved.....

I can see it now on the Daily Mail -

MOST WOMEN THINK MEN WOULD CHEAT GIVEN THE CHANCE!!😱

Interesting given that you don't have any past posting history either....

And these men cheat with .... Yep. women!

👏👏👏

Wow let's all give @taxpayer1 a round of applause because we NEVER saw that coming did we??

Yes, all those men are honest that they're currently partnered up aren't they? I'm sure their opening line is 'Hi my name's Mike. I'm a cheating scumbag with a pregnant wife at home. Can I buy you a drink?'

Jesus Christ how simple can you be? 🙄

Given that all/most men and quite a few women are cheats it seems to me we need to a re-brand of marriage.
I think we need to ban sex from marriage (except for the purpose of reproduction). Once sex has been removed from marriage then there is no need for sexual fidelity and no one needs to get upset when their partner sleeps with others.
I apologise to the few married couples who have successful sex lives, but they appear to be such a small minority that I think they need to take one for the team.

I love it when these threads about men being opportunistic cheaters come up and almost instantly people come on to say 'women cheat too' a bit like the statistics for vawg is about 98% committed by men, but you will always get people piping up about the 2% of 'non men'.
My experience is that it is significantly more men that are opportunistic cheaters than women.

Mostly the same here, bar one experience of being hit on and hearing the occasional rumour.

It's shitty of those two men to try it on, and it's shitty that OP's husband has cheated, but extrapolating that all men are cheats is unfair.

The women at these conferences are as likely to be married/partnered up as the men.

@EarthSight I was also thinking it's a spam post.

Yep. I have literally have many of them tell me this, who are otherwise decent people and even love their partners. Basically if the opportunity presented itself, then "why not"

I just adore (sarcasm, for those who just do NOT get it)
how in posts like these, there are always one or two utter Neanderthals who need to gender flip it. Ffs fuck off with that simple garbage.

when I was young and single, I cannot count how many married men tried it on with me. It formed my early opinion of men and their ability to be honorable. JUST MEN and only men. Fuck off to mansplain boards with the “women too”

Agree with you, when I was young I was hit on by everyone, even people who I thought were my friends and even family (in-laws, not blood related). For me it was maybe 10% of men who didn't hit on me. Men are scum. It's been more reflecting now that I was older just how bad it was

And here’s a thread of a woman threatening to cheat (and generally being a twat) for all the ‘it’s only men’ knuckle draggers:

https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/relationships/4829838-partner-and-her-ex

You’ve just read that a young woman was hit on by her own relations and you call her a vile creature. And you wonder why her experiences with men have given her that opinion.

Mary wept. Have a word with your own puny self.
you clearly can’t even put yourself in someone else’s shoes. Not one drop of compassion, eh, or you’d be aghast at how we are saying we’ve been treated.

literally EVERY man I met over his teens tried it on with me, and “no” wasn’t a good enough answer.

who is the vile creature? Look in the mirror, maybe. GTFO

Well obviously not all men, so I apologise for that 🙄
Vile creature 🤣 well that's something I've never been called before, you do sound like a true gentleman!
But don't dismiss my comment, this has happened to me, so pardon me for getting riled up on reflection of how I've been treated. First incident, probably around age 5 or 6, later around 15/16. Then pretty much my whole life until mid 30s.

Thank you

I'm sorry you've had such bad experiences but making a statement like "all men are scum" is not just deeply problematic if that's how you view half the world's population, but it's also shockingly offensive. Why others are defending that when we would in no way tolerate a statement like that from a bloke, which would be deeply misogynistic, speaks volumes.
And all those posters defending that comment - you're basically saying your sons, husbands, dad's are scum? Because they're all scum right? 🙄
How about we call out scummy behaviour in individuals, and not make hateful generalisations. It helps no one.

Yes I agree, I didn't actually mean all men are scum of course and got a bit caught up in reflecting on how much I have been 'hit on' in the past. I've been to similar conferences as well which was a particularly bad experince. Sorry OP I didn't meant to derail your thread, I'll step out now.

I think it does depend on industry. Shy geeks/academics vs swarmy salesmen/ bored shift workers (especially those working nights) for example.

I was pestered all evening at a sales conference by a bloke who told me his wife had died! (She hadn't, I Fb stalked him later). How low is that? He was telling me how tough his life was bringing up two kids alone. What a prick.

Most will tbh.