Polly and her Dollies are counting down to Christmas

[StuckInPollyannaMode]

Hello my lovelies

Is this going to be the thread where I finally get divorced? Will my Ring of Fabulousness ever be worn? Will the Divorce Tattinger be drunk?

I bloody well hope so. It's been a very long time coming.

Here we are again. In the main headline news... I'm still not fucking divorced from Geller. I've had to sign an affidavit for the absolute application to say yes, I want to proceed, because it's taken so bloody long.

The Dollies are amazing, brilliant and pains in the bum in equal measures I can't believe how much they're growing up. For Christmas they want to learn how to make me a cup of tea for my present. I'll take that. DD1 hasn't had a good couple of weeks, not helped by me having a whole load of work done in the house so things here have been a bit chaotic. DD2 has been off school poorly with D&V, poor little mite.

Geller remains an eejit who is unable to put the Dollies first. The shenanigans have been unbelievable and of true Geller quality levels. I am rising above. And doing a lot of deep breathing. My parents have now moved house and my mother is being her usual self. I've distanced myself quite a bit. I did help them out for a day but that's it.

I'm becoming addicted to exercise again and have graduated to the fast lane in the swimming pool, hurrah. I've survived several spin classes and even treated myself to a new pair of trainers. My gardening is coming on nicely (I'm very good in autumn with slash and burn, I can do destruction) and I've now got my new shed up.

Work is insanely busy and I'm on the edge of a new possibility which will, if it comes off, be life changing for me and the Dollies in terms of security. It's going to be a crazy few months but I'll give it all I've got.

I haven't heard from Westley since I threw my toys out of the pram with him wanting to still be friends and message me randomly - no. I'm too good for breadcrumbing and I've got enough friends, thank you. I'm not dating, not planning on dating and finally feel like I'm starting to move on. But it's not a priority for me right now, although I do really miss cuddles. And sex!

Perhaps most excitingly, today I am trialling a new foundation. It's supposed to be a dupe of Estee Lauder's Double Wear, which I love, but I just can't justify the cost of for everyday wear.

As ever, if you're still following me, thank you. Without MN and you all I wouldn't be where I am today.

@StuckInPollyannaMode

Just when you think her batshittery can't get any batshittery-er, she rises to a new level.

Honestly, sometimes she reminds me of Bridget Jones' mum in the movie. Just cannot see more than 6 inches from her own brain!

I'd give her an N95 mask and tell her she needs to wear it 24/7. Then I'd follow her around with a can of spray disinfectant.

Does anyone remember Billy Connolly rambling on about the nurse whose cure for everything and anything was “A Wire Brush and Dettol”? That might work…
Meanwhile, nearly 5am here. Just popping this one down.

And one for Geller. Let’s hope he takes the hint.

Just checking in to see if Polly has strangled her mother yet? I definitely would have

Hope you have managed to have a good Christmas , Polly, despite the many challenges!

Polly how are you and your girls doing? Hope you haven't pick up the illness and resisted the urge to build a patio.

How old is your mother? Because I would have sent her home, they've had 3 years nearly to know the infection protocol.
What the actual Fuck ?
Id tell her next year you 3 have been invited by an old friend, FAR away...
Then stay at home in peace
STOP the carnage

I’m sending round a few friends to help with your Mum @StuckInPollyannaMode

Oh Polly you poor thing, hope you all managed to survive without major ructions!
Did you banish your DM to her bedroom for the duration, because honestly that's what I would have had to do.
Happy new year, may 2023 be your year 🥂

@StuckInPollyannaMode
Sending you and loads of love to you and your Dollies. <hug>

Polly, do yourself a favour and fgs book a fucking holiday away just you and the dollys next Christmas

you do have to go mega LC with your mum. You really do.

I absolutely would confine M and d to their room too. Fuck them and their ridiculous sense of entitlement

I proper laughed out loud at that @Fraaahnces ! 😆

Wishing you continued strength (not to strangle your thoughtless parents) to be able to carry on through the festive period @StuckInPollyannaMode.

Here is to starting 2023 in a better way than 2022 is ending!

They’ve gone.

managed not to kill my mother anyone

in the face of extreme provocation, I managed to keep it together til the last night. Went a bit wrong for about ten minutes but we’re through it.

I can breathe. Until the next batch arrive tomorrow for new year…

hit me up with suggestions of where to go next Christmas that are hot, cheap and don’t have a member of my family anywhere near them…

hope everyone else is surviving ok! Xx

@StuckInPollyannaMode Thank the Lord they were well enough to be chucked out go home
Next year - How about Norway? Wouldn't the Dollies love to meet Rudolf and go on a proper sleigh ride? maybe ski a bit? Or you could take them on a cruise (med) - everything you need on a boat, so no unexpected guests unless they're willing to hire a helicopter 😉

Well done for surviving the guest from hell. Consider doing a house swap next year. I am sure someone in the sun would love a traditional English Christmas

Well, I'm in the US so not so sure about cheap for you, and it's not 'hot hot', but if you want gorgeous weather and plenty of child friendly activities, go to San Diego. World famous zoo, wonderful huge park (Balboa) and sparkling beaches. But the best thing is that it's 5500 miles from your family. Is that far enough?

Seriously, you survived, that's the main thing!

Well done for surviving your parents's visit without committing justifiable homicide.

The Canaries should be warm and cheapish in December, if you book early enough and also a shortish flight away which is always a bonus. Also, you could consider Andalusia, still a lot warmer than the U.K. in December and hopefully far enough away from your DPs.

Polly- I escape with my kids to the canaries every Christmas. Weather is always above 20'c, not too long a flight, plenty of accommodation options and the people are absolutely lovely (also there's honey rum...).

I started it in 2018 and minus covid, have done every year. Happy to give you some ideas if you'd like

Another vote for the Canaries - a friend escapes to Lanzarote every Christmas (also has a horrendous Ex though not quite Gellar scale) and has a lovely time.
Going abroad you and your Dollies can avoid a whole heap of Mother/Gelkar selfish fuckwittery and have a relaxing Christmas. Do it!

I remember being on holiday in Lanzarote in January, many years ago. Spent most of the holiday sunbathing on the beach, then landed back at Gatwick to several inches of snow. Was a bit of a shock to the system.

Cape Verde, stunning

If you go to Gran Canaria or Lanzarote, I'm happy to share places I've stayed/recommendations for stuff to do.

Please share! (I didn't have Polly's Christmas... but could really do with some imaginary sunshine now too.)

Happy New Year Polly! I think of you often as I go through my own travails, (extended family still here, week five), if Polly can do it, so can I.
It will all come right in 23.

Happy New Year Polly, and to everyone else on here.