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Original poster

Dating Thread 147 - Double Dating Anyone?

999 replies

TooOldForThis67 · 11/02/2019 19:31

Dating thread rules:

  1. The first rule about the dating thread is you don't talk about it with people you're dating.
  2. Develop a thick skin.
  3. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
  4. It's all BS until it actually happens.
  5. Trust your gut instinct.
  6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
  7. You are the prize - they should be trying to impress you.
  8. If it's not fun, stop.
  9. Loo update is mandatory.
10. No dating the thread. 11. Do unto others as you would have them do to you.

And a reminder - you don't know them until you know them!

OP posts:
unique1986 · 14/02/2019 10:44

I decided this guy I had met with few times was prob not going to be serious relationship material for few reasons and availability.

Anyway went out last night he came to my home town, went to cinema.
The film had teens smoking weed in it, which came up afterwards.
Turns out he smokes it twice a month apparently.. .
I was bit surprised, am not a fan.
Red Flag?

supercali77 · 14/02/2019 11:32

unique I've known a lot of pot smokers. Was one myself in my 20s. I'd say. It's likely more than twice a month but if the rest of his life is in order....it doesn't mean people are always unproductive.

DaffoDeffo · 14/02/2019 11:37

Feeling a bit bleak today. Not even going to open my WhatsApp! I know this is my fault for not going on the apps but still...argh...

Went to work and 2 people said 'ooh I bet you have a great night waiting for you' and I thought yeah, the finale of Hunted, my vibrator and a Nandos with the dc. Woohoo!

I don't mind drugs but they would need to have a take it or leave it attitude. If it was regular, it would bother me I'm afraid.

Marlboroandmalbec34 · 14/02/2019 11:42

Haha Daffo that doesn’t sound too bad a night 😁
Anyone got any advice for me?

ceecee32 · 14/02/2019 12:02

@thesea and @auba.
Meeting for a coffee this evening. I hope he is as nice as he seems.

Original poster
TooOldForThis67 · 14/02/2019 12:20

Marlboro - I've not looked for FWB or ONS although had a few which turned out like that! It depends what you put on your profile or what site you used. It sounds like you both had a good time so why not send a 'fancy doing it again' msg?
ceecee - Glad you've decided to go on the date. Hopefully you'll find out a bit more about him but don't focus on finances. Tell yourself he's not your responsibility, relax and enjoy.
Love - Will you wait and see how it pans out?
Unique - Why twice a month? It's obviously a regular thing but if everything else about him is ok then I wouldn't worry. Time will tell.
Daffo - Nothing ventured, nothing gained! Lol.

OP posts:
Lovemusic33 · 14/02/2019 12:27

Well my date with Mr SA tomorrow is cancelled, I bit fed up as tomorrow is my birthday and I will now spend it alone, I don’t really have time to plan anything else, was meant to be taking me out to lunch as I’m working in the evening but now he’s busy, there was always a chance this could happen so I can’t really moan at him so I am moaning here instead. It’s half term next week so won’t be able to see him as I have no child care.

helpmeoutout · 14/02/2019 12:29

@Marlboroandmalbec34 I would drop hints about meeting up/going n a date, ultimately you aren't looking for a friend so at some pointyou'll need to meet up to see if there is a spark in real life.

DaffoDeffo · 14/02/2019 12:49

marlboro last time I did old, last year for a few months, I only ended up with FWB. It did wonders for my confidence but I really wanted a relationship. I was just v open and said I didn't think me and them were relationship material but there was a physical spark so we just shagged. Not that often, but enough, and I found it quite useful as it meant I wasn't diving into bed with others who might have been relationship material.

I think the key is communication and honesty. I always push for meeting v quickly as so many times you can get on brilliantly in messaging and face to face it doesn't work.

DaffoDeffo · 14/02/2019 12:50

Happy birthday for tomorrow love

Lovemusic33 · 14/02/2019 13:20

Thank you Daffo, I might just drive to a cake shop and fill my face with cake 🤣. I’m annoyed that Mr SA hasn’t really appolagised. I shall have a day enjoying my own comapny.

BatshitCrazyWoman · 14/02/2019 13:27

Glad you've decided to meet him ceecee - it sounds like he has a plan to deal with his situation which is good.

Happy birthday for tomorrow love - do something lovely for yourself.

Mr Italian (met him last night, didn't fancy him in the slightest, sent a kind 'no spark' message) thinks I'm boring because I wouldn't fuck him in the accessible toilet .... bullet dodged there

LilyRose88 · 14/02/2019 13:32

Lovemusic shame about Mr SA but maybe treat yourself tomorrow night with chocs, wine, and Netflix or whatever floats your boat. Hope you have a lovely birthday anyway.

My Valentines evening will be spent solo with Netflix but I am on a diet so no chocs or wine Sad.

Mr Much Younger texted me earlier wishing me a Happy Valentines Day and saying that he was looking forward to meeting me on Saturday, so all is not lost Grin.

Auba14 · 14/02/2019 13:33

love Why has he cancelled? Is it something unavoidable that you knew there was a chance of him cancelling over? Does he know it’s your birthday? I’m sure I remember you saying that there was a chance this would happen so try not to be too downhearted.

How many dates have you had? God so many questions! I would be worried with something so new wanting to see them on your birthday may scare them off.

BatshitCrazyWoman · 14/02/2019 13:40

All three of my irons sent me happy Valentine's day messages. It's like they think I'd be cross if they ignored it 😅 (I wouldn't be). I'll be at home tonight, will work out and then watch Netflix and drink tea - happy Valentine's to me!!

lifegoes · 14/02/2019 13:57

Well I've got this date tonight. Heart not in it all. He's suddenly turned into a 15yr old boy. Everything is an innuendo. It was funny at first. But I can't even have a normal conversation without him turning into something.

BatshitCrazyWoman · 14/02/2019 14:15

Oh that would put me off lifegoes 😕

Lovemusic33 · 14/02/2019 14:31

Auba14 Yes, he did say that he might get called to work so it was never 100% certain, just a pain as he messaged me this morning saying how he couldn’t wait until tomorrow and then a couple hours later he got the call saying he has to work Sad. I sent a message back saying “that’s ok” (with a sad emoji) but he hasn’t even read my message. I will find something to do, just a bit disappointed but not angry with him as he needs to work.

Lovemusic33 · 14/02/2019 14:32

lifegoes that sounds annoying, the occasional joke is fine but after a while it gets a little boring.

Lovemusic33 · 14/02/2019 14:34

Auba it would have been our 4th date, he knows it’s my birthday which is why he wanted to see me but then this mornings message sounded more like he just wanted sex so I’m not really sure (we were meant to be going for lunch). It’s not the end of the world.

lifegoes · 14/02/2019 14:35

@BatshitCrazyWoman @Lovemusic33

Yeah it has, he made one joke yesterday which made me laugh. Now every text has been that since.

I've just told him there's only so much I can find funny.

I think he's trying too hard tbh.

It's my first OLD maybe I just need to see what he's like in person

Lovemusic33 · 14/02/2019 14:40

He might be totally different in person, people are braver when texting.

MyOldBrainStoppedWorking · 14/02/2019 15:00

lifegoes I've got one those. It was funny at first but I'm bored now.
I'm trying to find a way to tell him to stop it.

Love shame about Mr SA. You should treat yourself to something nice. Cake sounds good.

I'm out tonight. Not on a date - sports event with a Valentine twist. Should be a good laugh.

lifegoes · 14/02/2019 15:30

@MyOldBrainStoppedWorking

It's a strange one, I do think he's just trying really hard. But it's too much.

I've made a joke of it back and he's said ok you are right. Only so much is needed

It's like I'm attracted more to the ones that keep me on tender hooks and the ones that are lovely and try. I get bored of

Marlboroandmalbec34 · 14/02/2019 15:37

Thank you @tooold and @daffodeffo. I am going to take the bull by the horns on both accounts. I don’t want a relationship so I really have nothing to lose. Will report back!

Happy birthday @love