Dating thread 141 - fun and games

[Koko12]

Hope not stepping in anyone’s toes but thought I’d start the new thread as old one was full and I wanted to post!

Dating thread rules:

1. The first rule about the dating thread is you don't talk about it with people you're dating.
2. Develop a thick skin.
3. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
4. It's all BS until it actually happens.
5. Trust your gut instinct.
6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
7. You are the prize - they should be trying to impress you.
8. If it's not fun, stop.
9. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread. 11. Do unto others as you would have them do to you.

And a reminder - you don't know them until you know them!

cool well done for lasting 30 mins. Most of my dates this year have been like that. I suspect tonight's date will be same.

likeridingabike I echo what Daffo says. It's unfortunate that he's ill but surely he can still plan something for next week, say, when he's feeling better. Sounds like he's making excuses.

JeSuis "we'll work something out". That would annoy me because it usually means they're waiting for you to sort out the next date.

I've got a new chat going on Tinder. So far so good. We've discussed everything from food to holidays to politics to music. All in 24hrs. But he works crazy shifts so fixing a date could be tricky. But I'd really like to meet him

Milo unlike tinder, Bumble doesn't delete all your messages when you delete your profile. It just shows you as a deleted user. So send him your number!

@runsforcake that sounds really positive! When it flows like that I've never had a crap date ... I mean I can't give guarantees 😂 but my experience. Hopefully you can get a date in soon

Milo I sent MrPB my number before I deleted my POF profile, better than just disappearing.

@runs - lucky you! I wish I could have a good 24 hour chat. I gets messages in drips and drabs, get bored and unmatch.
Thank you for your advice. But now I think him being Europe wasn’t a barrier to arranging something. So, maybe he’s not interested. All this circumspection initself is unhealthy. Time to delete Bumble I think.

@like what wording should I use without coming across as sad?

Milo I just said something like "I'm just about to delete my profile, didn't want to just disappear, here's my number if you're on WhatsApp" all cool and casual :)

Thanks @like. That is very helpful. I am going to read through your posts but what became of MrPB? Did you whatsapp you soon after?

@Milomonster sorry to hear you're having a rough time of it. Can you hide yourself on Bumble and then rejoin?

Milo He WhatsApp'd straight away and we're still talking, although not getting anywhere.

Hoping I can join in here?
I've recently given up on Bumble after talking to 4 men, trying to meet 2 of them, being ghosted by 1 and then having the dates changed for 3 weeks by the last guy (it was only for a coffee, maybe that is the issue?). Struggling a bit as I don't have much childcare in the evenings and so thought meeting for lunch/coffee in the day was a good way to just check the essentials before shelling out for a sitter. Is that off putting for them or something?
Now have a guy on fb who is a friend of an old acquaintance, lives miles away and judging by his profile has a lot of single women commenting on his posts daily . He keeps messaging me weird things which make me wonder if I'm not getting him. Today was literally "Oh". And then "Oh LonelyandTired". That is weird, right? He seems quite normal on his profile although quite posy (loads of pics of his head).

Just remembered a funny day date from a couple of months ago - this is possibly the best place to share it! Met guy, went for a walk on the beach. He proceeds to tell me he was sucked into an evangelical church where they "worked with posessed children" . To be fair he did say he then left as he realised it was OTT, but literally 5 mins later was telling me that 2 of his female friends had "convinced" him he was a narc . So at this point I'm like "oh dear I just noticed the time..." and we are walking back to my car. He clearly didn't get that I was suddenly having second thoughts and proceeded to tell me that he had been so convinced he went to a psychotherapist to see if he really was. Then randomly that he thought his family were really cruel to their pets when he was younger. Needless to say, that was a no from me. Just glad I got to the car before I heard any more!

Omg this is a horrendous date lol. I am half way through. He has a list of things to talk to me about on paper. He keeps doing silly accents. Thank god I have told him I'm tired so I will escape after dinner. Oh and all women he seems to have fallen out with. His ex wife, his sister, his daughter omfg. Honestly dates where you know you will dtd are infinitely better 

Oh @daffo - the last two posts make me think coming of Bumble for a while is a good strategy.

*off

Just had an odd message exchange with MrPB. I'm 95% sure I'm completely wasting my time, maybe we can be friends? I'm not even sure about that actually, so disappointing.

@daffo how big is the loo window 😂

@like what was the message?

@like why is he being so difficult about meeting?

Well I’ve sent the message to MrDivine and deleted my profile. I need a break and it was taking up too much of my time but getting nowhere.

Super & Milo He says he wants to meet again, he likes me, he fancies me, he enjoyed my company BUT he also said he thought we were getting to know each other (messaging) he doesn't want to rush into anything and my friendship is important to him. My brain is fried. We started off talking about being friends, he was the one who changed that after we met saying he wished he'd kissed me etc. I've called time on the conversation for today, it shouldn't be this hard.

@supercali77 @DaffoDeffo I climbed out of a loo window once! But ended up stuck in some bloody courtyard

Hi everyone. Long term lurker here. I've been old for a few months. I seperated from exh Halloween last year. Anyway had a few dates here and there which never amounted to anything. Since September I've been talking to a guy I met on tinder on whatsapp. I was sceptical as he's only 24 and I'm 30 with two dc.
But he holds a conversation better than guy's I've met who are older. We message pretty much all day every day, however we have not met yet. We planned a night a couple of weeks ago but he text me a few hours before saying he was stuck in work. Every other time I've tried to re arrange he has some excuse as to why he can't. Normally I'd delete and move on but he always messages me and doesn't seem distant or anything. I don't know if I'm wasting my time or not. This dating stuff can be so hard! Sorry that was so long

Passmeagain Welcome to my world, there are unfortunately a lot of men who want virtual relationships and I seem to be very prone to getting sucked in by them. My rule is that I won't now chat for more than 2 weeks without meeting so I would have ditched him by now, this isn't fool proof and I need a new rule for when you have one date and then it turns into a pen pal situation. I'm afraid you need to set a short deadline to meet and if it doesn't happen call it a day, easier said than done. Watching a couple of episodes of catfish might help.

You know your date is going to go badly when you walk into the pub and don't see anyone who looks remotely like the bloke you're supposed to be meeting. Then some guy smiles at you and says your name. And you think no, you don't look like the bloke from Tinder.

Yep, my date looked nothing like his photo. Fortunately he was nice enough to talk to for an hour without feeling the need to climb out of a window. But after an hour I'd run out of things to say, so I made my excuses and left.