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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

My poor Daughter

162 replies

upset70 · 02/06/2007 21:00

Not sure where this one fits...

I feel like my DD is a laughing stock, it goes back to when she was very first born, she has always been chubby and when she started walking/crawling she was clumsy (as all babies are) and the family used to joke that she was like a bulldozer and would say things like "hide all the ornaments if emily is coming around..". I thought maybe I was just being paranoid but it seems to have followed her around as shes grown up.

When she started nursery the other kids used to ask their mums why she "had a fat belly" and why she "looked like that" and their parents would always brush their comments off with an embarrassed smile. When she started reception the other kids would roll their eyes whenever they saw her coming, they would call her dopey and say things like "stay away from me today I dont want my pictures ruined" etc. She has always been quite forgetful and the one time one of the girls in her class had a party and told my daughter that she couldnt go as she'd forget the date and then the other girls started laughing at her saying she'd forget were she was going half way there etc.

She's now 11 and this attitude towards her has continued all through her life, the teachers say things to me like "she's a dreamer" and "she's in her own little world" but the other kids are more nasty saying she's "gormless" and docile. We were in town a few weeks ago and she saw one of the boys from her class and as he walked past her she did that "duh" face (where they stick their tongue in their bottom lip) and shouted "duh" really loud in her face, all his mates burst out laughing and he said "its ok, she'll forget about it by monday"

When she started her secondry school last september the 2nd day there they had a pe lesson where my DD ended up falling over in front of the entire year group, this totally wrecked any hope she had for making friends at this school and they all keep going on about it to her "show us how you fell over" every 5 minutes etc

Today was the straw that broke the camels back really, she had been invited to a party by one of the kinder girls in her class, turns out she only invited her because her mum felt sorry for my DD anyway somewhere over the past few weeks my DD had heard it was a fancy dress so we went all over yesterday to get her a costume, we got her an "elizibeth swan" costume and she went in it all proud today only to realise when she got there that it wasnt fancy dress at all, one of the bitchy little brats had told her it was for a laugh. She was the only one dressed up, the "kind girl" just looked confused and looked at her mum as if to say "what do I say?", my DD was obviously mortified, the rest of the girls were in hysterics and even the parents were giggling among themselves.

I just feel so sorry for her, is life always going to be like this for her? she tries to laugh along with them but she's hurting.

OP posts:
lessonlearned · 06/01/2009 16:31

Why all the shouting, Kelly?

MaryAnnSingleton · 06/01/2009 17:26

it's very rude to use entirely caps

BitOfFun · 06/01/2009 17:39

Welcome to MN Kelly- you will get used to it,honestly! Have a look in "getting started" too- I think there are tips in there for posting, so you don't get flamed for not being "in the know" about stuff like the caps and posting on old threads. If you use "active conversations" it is easier too than looking through all the topics. Anywhoo, will see you around

KELLYMG · 06/01/2009 17:59

GET A GRIP,YOU LOT. I USE CAPS BECAUSE IT TAKES A LOT LESS TIME THAN SWITCHING CASE CONSTANTLY,(MY TIME IS LIMITED.) IF THERE WERE GOING TO BE ANY COMMENTS TO MY INITIAL REPLY, I EXPECTED THEM TO BE CONCERNING MY OPINION,NOT THE FACT THAT IT'S AN OLD THREAD! SO WHAT? THE MAIN POINTS OF A SITE LIKE THIS IS TO GIVE ADVICE & TO VOICE YOUR OPINION...& THAT I DID. I WAS NOT,NOR AM I BEING,RUDE. TELLING PEOPLE THAT THEY CAN'T USE ALL CAPS & NOT TO POST ON OLD THREADS...HAVE NONE OF YOU ANY CONTROL OR POWER IN YOUR "REAL" LIVES SO,TRY TO MANIPULATE & BULLY PEOPLE OVER THE NET? ANYWAY,PLEASE DON'T TRY THAT WITH ME.
I AM "IN THE KNOW."
I DO NOT HOWEVER,APPRECIATE BEING TOLD HOW TO BE.
THE CHILD HAS "ASPERGERS."
JUST A SHAME THAT I WASN'T THERE AT THE TIME TO BE ABLE TO POST TO HER MUM.
I HOPE THAT THEY HAVE RECEIVED THE HELP THAT THEY BOTH NEED & THAT LIFE HAS BECOME EASIER FOR THEM BOTH.

MaryAnnSingleton · 06/01/2009 18:01

I'm just saying that using capitals comes across as shouty and won't endear you to people who might be able to help or advise, that's all.

BitOfFun · 06/01/2009 18:01

Blimey, I was trying to be nice

Lulumama · 06/01/2009 18:13

goodness me, i was just pointing out it was an old thread, hardly bullying

perhaps, if you started a new thread about bullying/special needs/aspergers etc, then you would get more responses and more of a debate

but the confrontational attitude is a real turn off.

and on all internet discussion forums, capitals is bad etiquette as it is shouting, so perhaps use lower case if you can;t be bothered switching ?

what do you mean , you are 'in the know'? about what?

how very confusing

but if you would like to start a new thread, i am sure lots of people will give you their opinions

welcome to MN

lessonlearned · 06/01/2009 18:13

Nevermind BOF you can't win 'em all!

BitOfFun · 06/01/2009 19:36
Grin
Pimmpom · 07/01/2009 10:57

Oh bloody hell, I've just read 7 pages and not realised it was an old thread - I'm going for a lie down

FunkierThanAMosquitosTweeter · 07/01/2009 20:49

Ha! Me too Pimmpom!

IsaacsFabMummy · 07/01/2009 22:39

OMG how much time have i just wasted reading an oldie zzzz my head hurts from all the shouting!

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