Spring has sprung and the sap is rising! It's Dating Thread 104

[IToldYouIWasFreaky]

The Rules:

1. The first rule about the dating thread is you don't talk about it with people you're dating.
2. Develop a thick skin.
3. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
4. It's all BS until it actually happens.
5. Trust your gut instinct.
6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
7. You are the prize-they should be trying to impress you.
8. If it's not fun, stop.
9. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread. 11. Read Why Men Love Bitches (aka WMLB), and take from it what you will. 12. Don't serve up moose burgers on the first date (although this is still in debate right now) 13. Matthew Hussey also very useful. And very easy on the eye even if you don't find him any good. 14. IF THEY SAY THEY DON'T WANT A RELATIONSHIP, THEY DON'T WANT A RELATIONSHIP

It's relief with a simmering undercurrent of anger Handy. I just keep thinking "the fucker HUNG UP on me!"...that's what's smarting today!

Anyway, another red flag inspired by a discussion on FB...men who describe themselves as "good guys", or "old fashioned" or "chivalrous". A really good guy wouldn't need to call himself that, it'd be evident from his behaviour.

And the "old fashioned" or "chivalrous" thing is just code for "woman hater". I'll take your arm, pay for dinner and put you in a taxi but don't you dare object to any bad treatment. Put up, shut up and know your place, woman! I quite liked Bacon's manners when they were nice and teased him about always walking on the outside of the pavement but the flip side is that he saw me as less than him. In need of protecting from random cars splashing me but ultimately disposable when he decided he'd had enough.

I don't want chivalry, I want respect. I'll pay for my own fucking dinner if you'll just listen to what I've got to say and treat me like an equal.

Oh, looks like the undercurrent just welled up again!

Right, I'm going to add "feminist" to my Tinder profile and then head to the gym for more endorphins.

And VOTE!!! I need to vote. That's always cheering.

Ah, Waving I think that's lovely:)

I think the person you're all talking about was the apt named justaboy when in fact he was a mid sixties man!

waving I'm on a date tonight. First time of meeting so number zero date really.
Drinks in town, he's meeting me from the train station eek!

Is it brexit today? stay in europe you guys.

lastnick enjoy your date! date zero-th. Meeting at the train station is a funny one. You're walking along together before you can sit down and relax.. I've had that.

waving I wouldn't mind an older guy if he was fit! But 7 years is kind of the max for me. I just can't get past a bigger age gap.

That's so funny about your three old announcing to nursery that mummy is going out with mtg! It's official. What next?! change your facebook status at 3 am ?! :-p

I agree Freaky. "I'm old fashioned" or worse, "i'm old school" they are red flags. They also say similar things to me. That basically the man sees himself as being in charge of the little lady. She must be pretty. And if she's good, she'll get the door held open for her. Big deal.

Not brexit today 314 thats 23 June. I'm a bit worried :(
Today is local gov & police commissioners. ..
Smiling at you all discussing not fancying men in thrir 40s.. hope you all find the men of yr dreams before you have to contemplate the 50 somethings then. ..! :(

Nah, I think of myself as old fashioned, and a gentleman. But I hold doors open for anyone - men or women, it's just polite, isn't it? And I'm old fashioned in that I think it's good to spend time talking, rather than just swipe on a phone, hook up and shag, which is what millennials seem to think dating is all about. Instant gratification through technology.

I wouldn't say either of those things about myself on my dating profile though. It's too much of a cliche.

(incidentally, I'm a man in my 40s, and I. Am. Bloody. Amazing)

oh god ocelot don't scare me with stories of delapidated 50 year olds. There was one guy on okcupid, 51, he looked ok (ok, not like a movie star) and I was about to message him when it said he was looking for women 30-45 so I didn't message him after all. that kind of man, you're 6 years younger than he but he's thinking your'e the old one!
I'm going to do a quick 15 minute cardio workout followed by a yoga workout. Not a big fan of yoga, it's a bit too calm but I could do with a bit of calm.......

Lucky dilapidated old me! I got a 40yo look at me on pof so its only fair I donate him to you 314 he's Karlt40 & he's all yrs... :!

There is no chance what so ever the UK will exit Europe you only have to look at what happened in Ireland. We voted no, and had to vote again.
If you look at European legislation you'll note room for the next Govt to over turn or run another election once you're in, you're staying put. The vote is simply to placate those on the right.
Rant over:)

ha ha, lol, he says ''no weirdos please'' and he wants to date but not seriously. zzzzz

Well yes, Bant I would also hold the door open, for whoever was three steps behind me, if the door is going to swing shut just as they approach it, that feels rude to me, so I stand there for a while. But like you say, if women do that (and they do!) then mentioning it as though it meant something is the aspect of it that needs watching.

Now now bant no dating the thread

freaky how are you doing? I'd be ebbing and flowing in your shoes. Veering between rage (so bloody rude to be hung up on) and relief that there hadn't been weeks/ months of more leading on before finding out true colours.

waving that is beyond cute!!! From the mouths of babes.

last looking forward to your loo update.

dating I honestly don't look at age ranges per se. Am past putting those sorts of limits in place. More important to me is that they've had children. I'm not having any more.

mrcalm is confirmed for an official date date next Tuesday. mrfrench has also been in touch and we will be organising a drinks thing soon. Tonight was the night I was invited to join realthing and his friends on a night out. Still glad I said no, but gawd.....sooooo dreamy.

to the uber awesome thread. You're all fab!!

I have to add. Am sat next to such a hot guy on the train. I can feel his biceps. And he smells so good. I'm turning into a total perv!!!

Blimey. Cool your jets there. You'll end up in the daily mail. :-p

Right. off to work out. I hope this work out doesn't kill me.

ocelot I'm also smiling at not finding men in their 40's attractive - I'm 51 this year and believe me if you think the choice is restricted in your 40's, welcome to my world and see what you think. Most of the guys I've dated have been 45 to 50, as I just find men only a few years older than me very staid and set in their ways and when they say they are adventurous they are referring to one type of adventure they want to have - a leg over with any willing female 🙄

314.

Messaging Rave46 going well. I wonder if he'll ask me out.......

waving Jillian Michael's yoga meltdown very good. I have ordered the dvd. I want to work my way up to level three. I want to rock a bikini :D

so yeh, like i'm doing it for spiritual reasons obviously.