Let's Get Ready! It's Dating Thread 103

[DrFoxtrot]

The Rules:

1. The first rule about the dating thread is you don't talk about it with people you're dating.
2. Develop a thick skin.
3. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
4. It's all BS until it actually happens.
5. Trust your gut instinct.
6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
7. You are the prize-they should be trying to impress you.
8. If it's not fun, stop.
9. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread. 11. Read Why Men Love Bitches (aka WMLB), and take from it what you will. 12. Don't serve up moose burgers on the first date (although this is still in debate right now) 13. Matthew Hussey also very useful. And very easy on the eye even if you don't find him any good. 14. IF THEY SAY THEY DON'T WANT A RELATIONSHIP, THEY DON'T WANT A RELATIONSHIP.

I'm 175cm and live in heels during the week. Easily putting me at 185cm. Bloody gorgeous too! When I close both eyes

Love scottish accents.

My date earlier this evening was full of admo for carol vorderman and rachel riley. I said maybe ilm not old enough for you. My mum loves count down!

Night Sassy & 314 I'm off to bed.

Night chickens.
is it a BH in the uk tomorrow?
Thank goodness, a lie in tomorrow.
that's why it was popping out. Like a saturdat

Slept really badly! Knew it! 314 you are hilarious! Enjoy your lie-in. Did I read that right, your 29 year old is into Countdown? Are you sure you don't mean 8/10 cats does Countdown?

314 glad you had a fun date but wonder whether if you pursue it you'll be creating a different version of the Bear situation and get hurt I probably sound like your mother.

Going for a run shortly - kill or fire for my head then it's a typical bank hol of going to the tip following garden mission. Plus checking in for updates from JollyX and Freaky

Seeing Twix tomorrow! I've been missing him over the weekend...

Bugger all to update. Message sent at 6.30pm yesterday still unread and he's not been online since before then. So, still in limbo.
Git.

Its a rollercoaster...we either have irons who after a short honeymoon period (& often dtd) go weird & make us feel s or no irons & feel a bit s in another way...
I am very happy for the few who having managed to get fledgling relationships off the ground....& wish it for all of us....there seems to be a lot of of luck involved....

314 hope you are not feeling too delicate this morning :)
I thought it was fine you described that guy in his own words...

Freaky at the very least he is taking time out to think - without thinking how that might make you feel - is it some time since he's been in a relationship?

Oh I'm not liking thread 103 one bit
karmic turns from dreamboat, moose hunter to spineless ghoster
bacon turns from warm, flirty banterer to mr cool and aloof causing all kinds of anxiety
bant gets criticised for posting a completely innocuous post, of which so many worse have been seen on here many a time before and gone completely unchallenged. I don't want this thread to be a place where people feel they can't be honest and say what they actually feel for fear of being called mean?
314 your posts after cocktails and fun were hilarious! It sounds like you had fun, but do be careful we luffs you and don't want you hurt again after bear

Well everyone wishing you all a nice relaxing bank holiday Monday, it's miserable here (no surprise) but I've got a play date with my 3 year old in a ball pond somewhere so no matter!

That's a kind way of thinking of it Ocelot! I hope that's what it is. His last LTR ended about 5 years ago, and he's dated lots since, including one 6 month relationship that fucked him up a bit.
I am not sure if things can be redeemed after this...He's got some explaining to do, if he ever gets in touch. ..

If i think someone is being mean I will say it - also in real life. Especially when it is about a friend or prospective friend/activity buddy. It is totally possible to be descriptive, funny, sarcastic etc without it
Am I the only one to be censored Last?

Freaky if this is so - that he is having a wobble - then it could all work out fine...but you might have to leave it a while to explain to him how it made you feel..

The poster formerly known as looking4clues managed to ride this out with slow & it worked out fine....he only told her what had been going on with him years(?) later.... M did something like this & decided he couldn't do a relationship.. He said it wasn't me but him but... I don't know if that's so from recent events

freaky I can't believe he's doing this. Horrible. I still think the not-great sex may be significant. Despite appearing to be chilled out about it at the time, I suspect it's had a big impact on his pride and sense of manhood, and perhaps he can't face the prospect of it happening again. At least if he's not been on whatsapp then you know he's not messaging anyone else.

Actually M did the thinking after he took us both by surprise(!) by finishing with me after another lovely dinner....its more complicated but don't want to betray his confidence...
And sorry to mention my stuff again at all - I know noone likes hearing it!

Rather an ironic question ocelot when it WA you who tried to censor bant!!!

was

ocelot I wasn't around when you were dating M. How long were you together for?

Jollyp thx for asking but I seriously think the thread don't want to read it!
M was the love of my life...only found in later life (50s) & i thought i was so so lucky...you read the dénouement here last weekend...

I'm awake, drinking my second litre of tea now. That helps.

Well, there is no danger of that guy hurting me! so, on the one hand while it was absolutely pointless, it was also kind of fun. But he told me straight up he couldn't be friends with me because he was attracted to me. He was mature for a 29 year old and if he were older I'd consider it......................................... consider it, for a while anyway, see what happened. Or maybe not. Maybe I'd run for the hills. One of those two.

Freaky and Jollyx it's so crap isn't it.. I think there are some men who love the chase actually, they love our uncertainty. (I don't think Bacon falls in to this camp though, more Karma). I think that H knew he'd lose interest the moment we had sex and that's why he didn't make a move until date 8. I was beginning to wonder, remember. I liked that he didn't rush me, but looking back, it's almost like he knew he'd lose interest in me the moment we had sex. with bacon I think it's a combination of awkwardness + opening up + space + early in the relationship = ARGH

Not ironic Last my understanding of what you said is that people can say anything & no-one must question it.

I don't think there was anything remotely derogatory in what bant said. Dating is judgemental, you are judging from date 1 if they would make a suitable partner.

Freaky do you know what he's upto this weekend? Is he out with friends, visiting family? I don't want to upset the apple cart here but is it possible he's dating someone else? To be out of range all weekend says to me there could be another iron in the picture here. I know you had the are we seeing anyone else chat, but look at a mans actions not words and his actions are very low maintenance here.

Jolly he's so rude and I want to give him a piece of my mind for you. As I said on the FB thread, sit on your hands and see if he suggests meeting up.

Handy don't worry, there's no way I'm going to see this guy again. He'd think I was coming around and I'm not.

The next time I go on a date and pay a babysitter, he has to be

between 40 and 52
have kids &/or be certain he doesn't want more

My friend was right. Do not pay a babysitter to go out with a stranger who wouldn't date even if you do get on well.

Right, more tea. I feel ok. It must be the raspberries in the cosmo.

Raspberries in the Cosmo 314 ?

Roland I'm wondering what those kids are called now! I am guessing one begins with K and similar to the name of a poor car crash of a woman who hugh heffner scooped up when she was at her most vulnerable, and the other one, hmm, milupa? tommee tippee. hmm. What a fun challenge.

yes, it was a zuper x cosmo with a few liquidised raspberries thrown in.