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Original poster

Do you know if you're having bad sex?

550 replies

FLAMEinEckItsYuleAgain · 30/12/2006 14:52

Odd conversation with someone the other day... if all you've ever had is bad sex or sex with one person - do you know its bad? Or do you only realise when you get the good stuff?

OP posts:
Judy1234 · 01/01/2007 22:58

But MT interesting that a lot of women have rape fantasies as any book on female fantasies makes clear, despite how much the editors of those books hate the fact some women do.

suzycreamcheese · 01/01/2007 23:02

xenia..interesting but not connected..fantasy is a fantasy..

TeeCee · 01/01/2007 23:03

It's bad sex if you don't want to go back for more at any point, imo.

You may be having bad sex, there may be better out there, but if you're happy, if you love the person, if you're having fun, getting something out of it, want more of it, then that's what matters.

TeeCee · 01/01/2007 23:05

Xenia - a fantasy about being overpowered and being taken etc isn't the same as actually being scared for your life, actually being raped, and hurt and left scarred for life though is it.

VeniVidiVickiQV · 01/01/2007 23:07

Im not entirely sure what your point is there Xenia?

lazyanna · 01/01/2007 23:22

exasperated

What is so wrong with not wanting sex?

kittyinwaiting · 01/01/2007 23:35

Is bad sex really when you'd actually much rather be doing something else, anything else actually?

I wish I didn't want sex.

TeeCee · 01/01/2007 23:37

why do you wish you didn't want sex?

kittyinwaiting · 01/01/2007 23:39

Oh, because I'm not gettting any and I really wish I was. Dp doesn't find pregnant women sexy . I should be used to this by now, but it still pisses me off.

TeeCee · 01/01/2007 23:45

Oh no, you poor thing
I was outrageously rampant when I was pregnat, it was almost scary, I couldn't get enough. It must be SOOO frustrating for you

TeeCee · 01/01/2007 23:46

PS - congrats - when are you due?

Also - is it that you DP is scared to have sex with you?

kittyinwaiting · 01/01/2007 23:50

Teecee, thanks, I'm due end of March. Do you know I don't know if he's scared or not. He would NEVER admit to it, even to himself. Quite alot of men are though aren't they?

kittyinwaiting · 01/01/2007 23:51

Anyway off to bed, night.

suzycreamcheese · 01/01/2007 23:52

kittyinwaiting ...very frustrating situation i was always up for it when pregnant and most times got it..pregnant body is very beautiful - hey, your pregnant, you can have it with ice cream if you like!

kittyinwaiting · 01/01/2007 23:54

Yum, I'll keep going with the rabbit

suzycreamcheese · 01/01/2007 23:54

yeh, some seem to find it threatening state

suzycreamcheese · 01/01/2007 23:56

not wanting to rub it in but am on a promise so will be skipping off some point dont want to leave it too late..

kittyinwaiting · 01/01/2007 23:59

Have fun Suzy (sigh)

suzycreamcheese · 01/01/2007 23:59

if you got all bossy and domineering and came on to him would he get into it? might get you what you need iykwim

suzycreamcheese · 02/01/2007 00:02

always try to!
leave copy of kama sutra in loo might help..

kittyinwaiting · 02/01/2007 00:06

Suzy before I was preg with this one I always had to put in so much work and I'm kind of fed up with that now.
I would so like him to actually make a move on me because it would make me feel desirable. He says that I should know I am because he responds when I make the moves. But that doesn't make me feel wanted. I don't always want to be the one making the moves. I actually fell sh*t about it and it doesn't help my self esteem. I think some men are dead lazy when it comes to sex.

suzycreamcheese · 02/01/2007 00:10

strange isn't it; i think lazy can be the right word for it too.
i like initiating sex, but also do like to have dp make a move, it does make you feel sexy wanted and it can at unexpected time / place.
sex very important imo, he should make effort a bit and with knobs on if your pregnant..

fortyplus · 02/01/2007 02:28

Only just seen this!!

Drunk sex can be good sometimes but wouldn't make a habit of it.

Have tried lots of things with dh that I wouldn't have dreamed of when I was younger - and he says the same!

I think the only thing you miss out on when you've been with someone years & years is that 'hot pants' feeling the first few times you see someone - the anticipation of the first time you go to bed with them...

But I wouldn't swap - there were quite a few who lit my fire but I wouldn't have stayed the course with any of them.

Quootiepie · 02/01/2007 02:42

Ive only ever had (consentual) (sp?) sex with DH, so, I wouldn't really know whether it was good or bad... I don't really like it, so, I guess it's not wonderful... but im not about to run off and have an affair, so, im stuck with it Only ever had missionary aswell Sure you all wanted to know that

kittyinwaiting · 02/01/2007 08:16

Quootie, sounds as if you're in for some fun in the future then. Well at least I hope so for you