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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Am i officially an idiot?

283 replies

lou33 · 05/09/2006 12:51

As some of you are aware, i split with exh in nov. I havent wanted any serious relationships, but am also not prepared to live like a nun, so i have had hook ups with people, where i made it clear that it was on my terms and just fun. There have been times when i felt the hook up was getting too attached so i have ended it there and then.

As some of you are also aware i have been seeing someone for the last month, and once again it started out with me saying it was nothing but fun, which it has been. However, last night i ended it with him, because i found myself starting to like him too much. I told him that as it was now starting to feel different to me, it wasnt fair on me or him to carry on seeing each other.

He says we should carry on having fun til he leaves next year to travel when he finishes the army, but i said the balance of the relationship is now not equal in my eyes.

We do have fun, we do get on, it's cheered me up enormously through a v difficult period of time, i like having him about at weekends. But i ended it. A male friend of mine last night said if i was a bloke he would call me a d*ckhead with the way i was behaving, that i was cutting my nose off to spite my face.

Soldier wants to still see me, but we wont this weekend, tho he has asked if he can come up overnight next weds to make up for it.

Am i being a twat or am i right to end it if my feelings have changed and i dont think his have?

Ugh at this!

OP posts:
Quadrophenia · 12/09/2006 22:24

thread from lou on sunday entitled 'sod turning over a new leaf, i wore the dress and he was far from a gimp'

lou33 · 12/09/2006 22:28

oh boy, you guys are not making it easy for my transition to virtuous new lou33

OP posts:
lou33 · 12/09/2006 22:29

he has been texting me this eveing, he is in ipswich

obviously a glutton for punishment

OP posts:
Quadrophenia · 12/09/2006 22:31

thats because we are living our young man dreams through you, and you must not let us down!

expatinscotland · 12/09/2006 22:31

Virtue is boring.

If you enjoy it, and you're single, and they're single. Hey, why not?

Life's too short to live to anyone else's principles besides your own - unless the other party is involved in paying your rent.

Quadrophenia · 12/09/2006 22:32

expat

lou33 · 12/09/2006 22:32

stoppit both of you!

i feel myself weakening

but not about kelly jones , sorry

OP posts:
lou33 · 12/09/2006 22:33

he isnt so young this time tho, 9 yrs younger instead of 11

OP posts:
Quadrophenia · 12/09/2006 22:33

damn you i'm only here to make you fall in love so I can nabb him when you are not looking!

Quadrophenia · 12/09/2006 22:34

if i went with someone 11 years younger he would barely be legal you are showing your age woman

lou33 · 12/09/2006 22:34

you dont know the combination to my cupboard tho

OP posts:
lou33 · 12/09/2006 22:35

i'm 39

OP posts:
Quadrophenia · 12/09/2006 22:35

In have a blow torch and I'm off to buy a red spotty dress

Quadrophenia · 12/09/2006 22:36

I can't wait to be 39 sound like fun!

Molesworth · 12/09/2006 22:36

you'd hardly need a cupboard to keep Kelly in

hamster cage would do the job

lou33 · 12/09/2006 22:38

well it isnt only kelly in there, of course

not sure about 39 being fun, i think i am just in a panic about hitting 40 so am trying to turn into a rl mrs robinson

OP posts:
Quadrophenia · 12/09/2006 22:39

molesworth don't you dare diss mr jones

Quadrophenia · 12/09/2006 22:42

off to bed now, make sure you post an update x

lou33 · 12/09/2006 22:44

lol ok boss

OP posts:
Dior · 13/09/2006 13:59

Message withdrawn

lou33 · 13/09/2006 16:05

no he has more sense than that i think!

OP posts:
theUrbanDryad · 13/09/2006 17:05

sorry about the crash but i gotta say i LOVE that dress!

lou33 · 13/09/2006 18:30

crash?

OP posts:
lou33 · 14/09/2006 01:26

i seem to have a date tomorrow night as well now, with someone else

OP posts:
fairyfly · 14/09/2006 01:43

How are you doing lou? Have you had a good night?