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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Am i officially an idiot?

283 replies

lou33 · 05/09/2006 12:51

As some of you are aware, i split with exh in nov. I havent wanted any serious relationships, but am also not prepared to live like a nun, so i have had hook ups with people, where i made it clear that it was on my terms and just fun. There have been times when i felt the hook up was getting too attached so i have ended it there and then.

As some of you are also aware i have been seeing someone for the last month, and once again it started out with me saying it was nothing but fun, which it has been. However, last night i ended it with him, because i found myself starting to like him too much. I told him that as it was now starting to feel different to me, it wasnt fair on me or him to carry on seeing each other.

He says we should carry on having fun til he leaves next year to travel when he finishes the army, but i said the balance of the relationship is now not equal in my eyes.

We do have fun, we do get on, it's cheered me up enormously through a v difficult period of time, i like having him about at weekends. But i ended it. A male friend of mine last night said if i was a bloke he would call me a d*ckhead with the way i was behaving, that i was cutting my nose off to spite my face.

Soldier wants to still see me, but we wont this weekend, tho he has asked if he can come up overnight next weds to make up for it.

Am i being a twat or am i right to end it if my feelings have changed and i dont think his have?

Ugh at this!

OP posts:
suedenley · 18/10/2006 16:43

hi lou33
Ive just read this whole thread and wanted to say thankyou,i have just split up with dh (9th oct )im 37 and off out with the girls tomorrow and its good to know that yay i can have a s*ag if i want.That actually im not past it and there are other men out there for the picking
Good luck with your soldier you never know 6 months is a long time and anything could happen you never know you could end up going with him

lou33 · 18/10/2006 22:39

sarah, he is going to ko samet

watch out for ex tho i believe he is in naiyang still!

sue, thanks!

i really wouldnt want him to change his mind for me on something that is a lifelong dream tho

but yeh go and have some fun, you have no idea how popular ladies in their 30's are!

OP posts:
sarahinphuket · 19/10/2006 14:29

oooh and there was me thinking that I might pop up to nai yang this weekend now that the weather seems to be finally improving...

lou33 · 19/10/2006 19:03

just ask kobi where he is!

OP posts:
lou33 · 22/10/2006 17:10

another good weekend, and he came armed with handfuls of glowsticks for the kids which they loved

also he was supposed to go home on sat but he stayed til today

OP posts:
lou33 · 05/11/2006 22:10

i know i shouldnt bump this and am really talking to myself, but he came up again for the whole weekend and we took the kids to a fireworks evening on fri before going out for a drink, stayed in saturday, and as he left today he told me to book a nice restaurant for next weekend because he wanted to treat me

i cant remember the last time i was taken out for dinner

OP posts:
Bugsy2 · 07/11/2006 09:13

Just caught up with this Lou. Top boy - lucky you.

lou33 · 07/11/2006 11:19

AND yesterday he said he is cooking for us all on saturday, so a good weekend for me approaching

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