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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Relationships

Dating thread no 49

999 replies

JulietteMontague · 01/04/2013 15:17

All daters welcome here.

OP posts:

Report

TigsytheTiger · 07/04/2013 11:10

oh xpost Ike hurrah for the date, remember first rule of thread i just made that up, loo update if possible please

Flipper924 · 07/04/2013 11:10

Agree with Mercury. I wouldn't put all your hopes of finding Mr Right in OD. It could happen, and it does (looks at Snape, ), but is best seen, I think, as just one way of meeting or talking to new people.

It's a great place to practise flirting and chatting to men, and to practise spotting weirdos, without putting yourself at too much risk.

Especially if your social life otherwise consists of speaking to under 5s and your parents.

ike1 · 07/04/2013 11:12

Possibly getting married on a first date is the sort of thing I might have done when 21 but not now ... dont think... oh dear....I dont normally get all stupid like this ...bah ...let this be a lesson to all about breaking the OD rules.

Flipper924 · 07/04/2013 11:13

And I don't even have the under 5s to talk to.

Ooh, Ike, where are you meeting him, what are you wearing? I neeeeddd to know.

TigsytheTiger · 07/04/2013 11:16

and you OWW loo update too with Cakey

mercury7 · 07/04/2013 11:23

OD gives you a random sample of people, and if you took a random sample of people 'off the street' very very few of them will seem like potential love interests

Some may present themselves online in ways that suggested you'd get along with them, but in real life you'd know instantly that the overwhelming majority were just not people that you could 'click' with

Pomegranatenoir · 07/04/2013 11:23

I shouldn't take it all out on OD. Don't think my depressive state has much to do with it to be honest. It is all the other rubbish stuff going on. I will retire for a bit. I was looking for a fun distraction but maybe I just need to face up to things for a while.

Scrazy · 07/04/2013 11:26

Urgh, just got up as I was out last night on the town. Managed to drag ourselves home by 1.30 so not too bad.

Re age of men, the recent ex was the oldest man I've had, late 50's, but good looking, successful, charming and treats you like a queen, but underneath, he knows he was a rare one and women are just there as playthings.

We met a few men last night who were in their mid 30's and wanted to play guess our ages. One guessed 9 years younger for me (yes I know they guess down) and the other 12 years younger, they seemed genuinely surprised when my friend revealed my age. So that was nice.

I'd been chatting for a while to the one I met yesterday but nothing heavy just short emails and texts. We are going out again at some point.

OWW, 51 isn't necessarily over the hill. It depends on the 51 year old .

Will catch up later, not had time to read the thread, it moves on so quickly.

Snapespeare · 07/04/2013 11:32

Promise, hand on heart I will never ever ever be one of those smug couple-y annoyances who breezes onto threads be-wailing online dating to bleat on about 'yes-but-I-met-my-OH-online-so-it-obviously-works-there-must-be-something-wrong-with-you' I know from bitter experience it's a lot of flakey-disappearers and perverts. [nods] nameless is a fluke. There are flukes out there, it just takes a huge amount of frog-kissing and perseverance. Besides, it could all still go tits up. But it better not, because I deserve this.

mercury7 · 07/04/2013 11:35

Pom sometimes I find OD is a complete irritating pain in the arse and I'm relived to take down my profile and just not engage with people via dating sites for months at a time.

I have got better over time at just not taking any of it seriously...then again a very small number of people have stirred up a very large amount of heartache.

Overall I think I've learned alot, but there are some things that have happened that I will never talk about

KinNora · 07/04/2013 11:45

Ike -
clear

SLAP
( I do love you but don't necessarily want to stimulate your libido. Just sayin' x )

Juliette what an utter bag o' shite (mind you, I'm not exactly sold on the efficacy of GSM as it is). I imagine that lot would only have been crashingly disappointing -sloppy-gobbed kissers with the social skills of Roy Chubby Brown and the sexual technique of Frank Spencer, not fit to buy you a cheese butty, let alone anything else.

OWW - I'm all excited for you, c'mon Cakey, be great.
Have heard from Software this morning, he's a sweetie.

ike1 · 07/04/2013 11:52

Ha ha Kin 'knowing' about your love is enough dont worry! Flip I dunno I am all in a tizz..I think Im gonna go for clog boots skinnies and the old school blazer...lots of eyeliner..its either that or some leather and a sparkly mohair jumper ...havent really moved on from 88 which is when he will probs remember be from...

Kin ...I need emergecy eyebag advice though...

Scrazy · 07/04/2013 11:55

Mercury, hope nothing horrible has happened that you cannot post about it. I guess you are similar to me and don't like to over share. I leave things out too.

OWW and Ike, very hopeful for both of you and your dates.

Snape, I agree that nameless sounds like a gem and long may it continue but it is just luck and not down to OD as a concept. Just like meeting someone in RL, you might just meet someone in the supermarket/at a walking club and click but that doesn't mean everyone is going to meet someone in the supermarket/walking club blah blah.

Winefiend · 07/04/2013 11:59

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

KinNora · 07/04/2013 12:00

Ike - put a couple of used tea bags in the fridge for half an hour, then lie down with them over your eyes - it works.

Google Lisa Eldridge's video on covering them up, the woman's a genius.

You will look gorgeous - go for it.

mercury7 · 07/04/2013 12:00

Scrazy, thanks:)
no nothing horrible, just things where I look back and CRINGE and think, why oh why oh WHY, did I go along with that

but no, nothing 'bad' which left me feeling traumatised.
Although there was one bloke who, looking back I think I had a lucky escape, and times when I put myself in situations where I'd have been vulnerable had the other person bad intentions

mercury7 · 07/04/2013 12:03

I'd never ever ask anyone to guess my age, it just seems to much like fishing for compliments, and if it's anyone who wants to get on your good side they are only going to flatter you, surely?

ike1 · 07/04/2013 12:03

Kin thanks love ...got two slices of cucumber here...will they work? I am glad it wasnt too bad Merc just read your other post love...but I fully understand about the cringing...

KinNora · 07/04/2013 12:05

I think so, Ike, mainly it's the cold thing, but I'd have to check to see if any of the ingredients in tea bags have an actual chemical effect.

JulietteMontague · 07/04/2013 12:08

Thanks for the comments people, most of those were okc, 2 were POF (a first) and only Blond was gsm. I sincerely hope OD will find me someone to be with, I'm not going to fall over him in the street. I'm not looking to pass the time, flirt, get compliments, ego stroked from random men. I would like to meet someone I have a connection with, and tbh now in the meantime if sex presented itself on legs I would go for that at the moment.

Snape do not disappear, you're my example of how it can happen as you do deserve it with bells on. I'd like a Nameless-a-like.

Kin I've not yet kissed a gsm man, for all the reasons you outline
There are very few messages on gsm, maybe one a week. I just got a new, first message this mornng. He wants me to reply asap but tells me "My day is going to be such a busy one since i will be doing laundry and then later clean the garage." Shoot me now.

If anyone happy to check out my profile, please pm me.

OP posts:

Scrazy · 07/04/2013 12:09

Oh god no, I wasn't wanting to play guess my age, it's tedious but they were mid 30's one fancied me I reckon and the other DD and I think he was hoping she was older and they had a chance. Ha, ha, no chance!

JulietteMontague · 07/04/2013 12:16

Ike wondering if using pile cream works or if there is a reason not to do it

OP posts:

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ike1 · 07/04/2013 12:24

Just checked lisa ...got two green tea bags in fridge now...yeah heared about the ol Prep H treatment Jule...leaves a residue ..probs supposed to wash it off first ...duh!

mercury7 · 07/04/2013 12:25

I just dont believe anyone who says I look more than 2 or 3 years younger, I'm pretty sure I look exactly like someone of my age who has lived my life

I think you need to have spend serious $$ on cosmetic work to look much younger than you are, even then it's not just about the money, there's all the risks of things going wrong, or ending up just not looking 'natural'

Flip

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