Dating thread no 49

[JulietteMontague]

All daters welcome here.

I am bored of marking. Ho hum. Have to do this lot by end of tomorrow and as DC and I are going out tomorrow in the sunshine means a late night tonight and tomorrow. Is OK just not the most exciting way to spend Saturday evening. But perfectly acceptable really.

I have to stop picking my spot. It's been bleeding and everything

OWW is your rearranged date tomorrow or Monday?

Miranda Spots huh. My daughter picks and picks at hers and makes a real mess. It's so tempting though!

Date's tomorrow, I hope! Haven't heard anything off Cakey today, so hoping he's not gone flaky. Actually, he told me he's got his dc over so I am leaving him be as I don't want to intrude. Hope he gets in touch tomorrow to confirm as I am slightly nervous after last time.

Very slow online tonight too - where are my old favourites? Not sure if I can be arsed to start messaging some new ones. Fancied a chat with the engineer who I quite like too. He's 51, though, bit outside my normal range, not sure if this would be a problem.

Nora glad you're seeing Showbiz again for a spot of Friday night sniffin'

OWW Showbiz is 57, maybe older men are the way to go.

oww it is soooooooo boring online tonight. I have been on pof and match and there isn't anyone taking my fancy or me taking theirs more like.

Finding it all a bit exhausting. I need a night out to meet real people. I must arrange something to get me out of my rut!

Had a weird day today with my ex round visiting the kids and doing jobs in garden. Felt weird but normal at the same time. We actually managed to be nice to each other for the first time in ages. He is such a rat. Would never go there ever again but my little boy loved us all being together and that makes my heart break a little bit.

Loo update. CootGirl is interesting, funny, witty. But a bit gangly, graceless, private school hockey player type, which isn't really my thing. Shame. Mates, maybe, don't think much more. I've had several drinks tho and so has she do I just have to avoid the kiss goodnight in case she's expecting a big pash sesh. As she puts it.

Nora Hmm, that's a thought. I've never been out with a younger man, but it's usually been four/five/six years difference. I did go out with a much older man (well, he was probably around the age I am now!) when I was in my mid-twenties, but he was something of an arse.

So long as they look after themselves and all the bits are working, I do like someone a bit older. It probably stems back to being a teenager and finding the boys of my own age terribly immature and boring, and also to the being steady/reliable thing I was on about yesterday, although of course age is no guarantee of these things.

Cakey is about six months older than I am so he just about qualifies!

God I dont think I could have a big 'pash sesh' with ANYONE who said 'pash sesh'.....

bant big pash sesh would confuse things if you know she isn't for you. Simple peck and thanks for a nice evening should suffice.

A pash sesh? Oh Bant. You just couldn't. What a shame though.

Pom glad that things are going alright with your ex. Must be so difficult sometimes. I am going back in on PoF to see if there's anyone better on now . . . Haven't been on Match for a while, but that is generally even slower.

Been volunteering at the arts centre ...some 'interesting' looking geezers down there...lordy me oh yes indeed...

Chatted to a nice techie guy but I had to check the calender to make sure it wasnt 1971...

oww I don't expect things to be going well for long. Had an interesting letter today off his solicitor. What he wants won't make me happy and my response won't make him happy. He has already made me sad enough so he wont be getting his way! He is a rat of the worst kind. But I out the smile on for the sake of my children

Realllllllllly want to find a new man.

No big pash sesh :) it was like catching up with a vaguely remembered cousin to be honest.

I really should have arranged to meet up with a mate. I'm footloose and fancy free on a rare childless Saturday night.

Bugger. Home it is.

Techie guys can be a bit like that Ike - there is one at work with long grey locks a-flowing.

Pom I want one too! I think it's spring getting to us, the sap rising and all that nonsense. Good for you standing up to your ex.

'Pash Sesh' ? Was she Miranda ?

Older men, the majority I've met up with have been misogynists of the first order, cloaked with a gentlemanly charm. Quite a sense of entitlement that appeared if I've been anything less than in awe and fawning at their achievements. I can't stand men who assume I know nothing, that they are more intelligent than me and don't even ask enough to work out that probably isn't true.

However, the two I have known biblically were lovely. Also, I'm not sure where the thing about older men having ED comes from, I think it might be fitness related generally as when I've met Mr Softy he's usually been attached to the mid thirties group.

What is a pash sesh, never heard that saying before ?

[be nice now, my year of birth is 86]

Bant Pash sesh, bear with Banto, bear with...

Western by the time you get to 55 that will change, trust me. Massive difference in attitudes between 45 and 55 year olds. And basic grooming. Something also often happens to the shoes, they start wearing those weird comfort shoes and it would be impossible to shag Hugh Jackman if he wore those.

Pash sesh?! I might start using that now!

eternal mines '90

All this talk of older men and 30 is an older man to me!

Ooh, thanks Nora. I shall be beeeeoooootiful. And everso charming and flirty.

Pom, well done from me, too.

My ex will be 59 this year. He's an absolute arsehole, if you want to consider him in your survey of older men. A complete misogynist, masquerading as a liberal feminist. I don't believe all older men are like that, but he's the only one I have experience of.

Ah, how to define a pash sesh...

sigh I hate what an irrational hypocrite OD makes me. I will happily line up several dates and favourite new people while I've got a follow up in the wings, and yet now I find myself unreasonably troubled because the guy I have a second date with tomorrow has been busy online.

Anyway, the general advice is alway to meet asap, and I have found that good chat on email amounts to nothing. But so far I've always turned down guys who ask for a date immediately. Am I being unreasonable, should I relax or keep the possible futile twat radar going for a couple of messages?

I quite like the idea of a pash sesh

Stranger - I think 'meet asap' means basically don't hold off meeting until you feel you have a 'relationship' with the person. Meet when you think they may be an interesting person to talk to with no major red flags showing, but not just any random bloke who asks after learning your name. Have a little bit of chat first (phone, email or IM) and if they sound interesting don't string it out for a couple of weeks until the almost inevitable let down.

Cootgirl tonight, in my case. She was witty by email, her pictures showed her off in a good light. Even in person she was funny and made me laugh out loud a few times. But -I didn't fancy her in person, there was some body language stuff which just put me off. If we'd waited for weeks it would have been more disappointing. But we exchanged enough email beforehand to know we would at least get on okay in person.

Thanks Bant, that's what my instincts said. I find myself getting a bit annoyed with people who can't even be bothered with a few formalities. My time is not that free that I'll spend a couple of hours with anyone who jumps in.

Well what a rubbish night tonight online! Silly messages from Deffo, might give up on him as it's just blether, engineer came online but didn't reply to my message so it looks like he is a disappearer, got further embroiled in a tedious conversation about woollen mills and had three very lacklustre new ones.

Pants!