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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Original poster

Dating Thread 43

999 replies

WarmFuzzyFun · 23/02/2013 17:27

Here it is...

OP posts:
VelvetSpoon · 23/02/2013 17:30

Oooh new thread!

Well done WFF :)

Juliette, good news re the plumber!

KinNora · 23/02/2013 17:42

Ooh, that was a surprise.

I'm glad you got sorted, Juliette, how lovely it is when people are helpful.

OWW, have you told him that you're just feeling a bit fed up ?

JulietteMontague · 23/02/2013 17:44

Too right, that man is so kind. I was lucky, he is usually working night and day so there is an upside to it being Saturday, he had just finished Smile

48howdidthathappen · 23/02/2013 17:48

OWW I told Mr R&R over the phone. I think we both found it easier.

JulietteMontague · 23/02/2013 17:48

Western this is the new you who says what she wants and what she feels right? So he is asking you, he cares and wants to know. It's ok it you blurt a lot of stuff out, very unlikely he would run because of it and if he did, he would have run anyway. You could try the 'sometimes I feel...' approach if you are feeling brave enough.

OhWesternWind · 23/02/2013 17:55

I am going to have to call him later as I have sent text which needs explaining. Or I will ask him to pop over maybe.

Original poster
WarmFuzzyFun · 23/02/2013 17:58

Where are our boys, messrs Voice and Bant?

I have been busy and emailed 3 men Shock, am hoping a suitable man will get in touch.

I am counting Juliette's sorted plumbing as a thing to be glad about, plus the fact that I've just had a interested reply. Here I go again....

OP posts:
VelvetSpoon · 23/02/2013 18:04

I couldn't have a conversation like that on the phone. Partly because I hate using the phone, but also because I am a bit deaf, and my phone cuts out randomly.

Knowing my luck I would bare my soul, wait expectantly for a reply, only to realise the poor sod got cut off halfway through...

Western, see how it goes. If he can pop over might be easier to talk face to face.

mercury7 · 23/02/2013 18:07

place marking:)

grinchie · 23/02/2013 18:16

Hello again Smile

I was going to catch up with the last thread but then this one started!

Can anyone give me a brief update?

Snapespeare · 23/02/2013 18:21

Place mark. Nowt from nameless today, so I reviewed the hideous drunken text and it wasn't that hideous. Hmm basically said I'd been reading ME/CFS forums and understood when he was exhausted and wouldn't attempt to pressurise him into Blush 'intimacies' Blush sent non-committal 'hope you're feeling brighter' text this afternoon and.....nothing am assuming the 'understanding' me, will get that he's exhausted, so not expecting a response.... Which is just as well.

Ugh at laid-back people. They're confounding. We're possibly a bad match. Ia want to kiss him. Auuuuuuuugh.

micshi · 23/02/2013 18:28

Got a lunch date with Mr.Greek tomorrow. If I don't want to meet him again, WTF do I say? I've been with the same man for 19 years, so don't have much idea about dating, let alone OD!

Original poster
WarmFuzzyFun · 23/02/2013 18:36

micshi, the weather, the journey Grin

Erm, look at his profile and ask questions about his hobbies/interests etc. Neutral topics, not exes, not sex, etc

Someone who is more successful than me might write a comprehensive list of safe conversation starters...

OP posts:
48howdidthathappen · 23/02/2013 18:43

Velvet I thought I had done it face to face Wednesday night. In reality I had still been pussy footing. Thursday over the phone I nailed it Smile

micshi · 23/02/2013 18:46

I'm a bit worried about his English, it doesn't seem that great in texts! What I'm worried about is how do you let someone down gently if you don't want a second date?! Just so I can be ready!!

KinNora · 23/02/2013 19:00

In my experience they can usually tell, mischi although that might just be me and my expressive face ( always gets me into trouble ). I generally send a text saying thank you for the evening, it was nice to meet you, and keep away from me, you giant twerp good luck with OD.

OhWesternWind · 23/02/2013 19:03

If you don't want to meet again, Mis, you could do nothing and see if he contacts you - if not, then problem solved. If he does contact you, just send a text along the lines of lovely to meet you, nice evening, unfortunately no spark, good luck for the future.

lubeybooby · 23/02/2013 19:04

Hello all, hello new thread. I had a nice time and I think things are a bit better now.

Mischi thanking them but saying there was no spark seems to be de riguer

Good luck though! :o

micshi · 23/02/2013 19:08

Thanks! Very nervous about the whole thing. I'm not looking for the love of my life, more someone to go on dates with & more (when I've got to know them a bit better ;-))

OhWesternWind · 23/02/2013 19:10

Am farting about on here cos I'm really scared about ringing LM.

mercury7 · 23/02/2013 19:17

I feel like a candle in the bloody wind just lately, I really need to grow a pair and become a hurricane lamp! :o

VelvetSpoon · 23/02/2013 19:28

Western would it help if we virtually hold your hand a bit?

In the meantime - and I'm sorry to witter on about my own nothing-y stuff - I remembered a couple of things C said last night. He hurt his had the other day at work...he made a joke about being unsuited to manual work. A few mins later we were talking about my house (which is and has been a building site for years) and he said something like wasnt I hoping to meet some builder type so they could do my house up for me Hmm. Then later, we were in a slightly dodgy pub full of big, muscly blokes, a few of whom might've looked my way (mainly cos I was a bit overdressed, and 10 years younger than every other woman in there). C said how they made him feel a bit inadequate, and he didn't measure up Confused. He was quite drunk by then. I didnt make a big deal of either comment so I dont think he was saying it so that I'd boost his ego...or if he was, I didnt.

Don't really know if theres any significance in it or I'm just being silly and overthinking as usual!

mercury7 · 23/02/2013 19:42

sounds like he thinks you're a bit 'out of his league'?

OhWesternWind · 23/02/2013 19:50

Hand holding would be lovely, Velvet. Thank you. I did call, but he's still up his ladder with a paintbrush and said he'll call back later. I know I am just going to bottle it :-(

OhWesternWind · 23/02/2013 19:53

Do you think he lacks self confidence generally Velvet? Sounds like the comment about your house might have been a joke gone a bit wrong, but the remark in the pub does sound like he's after reassurance off you.