men who got to prostitutes

[jake42]

Hello .
ive been reading all the threads on here about guys who visit escorts/ prostitutes/ whores etc , and i know im probably going to be called all sorts of names as its mainly a womans site, but i thought id write and tell my tale.

42 year old male , married for some 15 years, adore my wife and child and my family life . i want to get old with her .
just after our marriage one evening after sex ,whilst cuddling in bed , she says ive been thinking, we dont have to do sex, we love each other , lets live together like a brother and sister ! WTF im thinking, whats bought this on, nothing i could say or do would change her mind, we had sex very infrequently after , mainly to try for a baby. once said baby was born , she obviously was tired most of the time and eventually moved into the spare room blaming tiredness and my snoring (i do snore, but not that bad) . that was around 10 years ago and is still there now. We may of had sex 6 or 7 times since, im never allowed the pleasure of oral sex either way ,sex is always at my request, but always with the feeling that she just wants me to come and finish.
i adore her and cant imagine life without her, but the thought of no sex or hardly any doesnt appeal to me at all.
so after being knocked back one time too many i visited a site where Escort girls advertised and agreed to meet one .
i have been discreetly seeing different ones for around 5 years, always take every precaution and making sure my wife does not catch anything.
im basically between a rock and a hard place, i need to have sex , my wife doesnt, we love each other , i dont want to leave her , she , i assume doesnt want us to split up . but i cant imagine life for another 30 yrs with out sexual contact. i kind of figure that paying for it off a prostitute is better than having an affair, which as i love my wife would be out of the question.
i would be glad if anyone out there could perhaps in someway give me some advice . oh and im not a woman hater , i adore female company more than male .

House - with women getting drunk, it depends whether this was against their will to the level of not remembering anything, or did the woman wanted to ger drunk and laid...obviously men rapists if they preyed on a woman who normally doesn't drink and doesn't meet strangers in bars. But there is a big 'ladette' culture (to my personal horror!) where women in their late teens and early 20s just want to be like boys or whatever, and go on the pull, and then BOH boys and girls ger stupidly drunk and sleep with whoever. That's what Retro was saying - she knows a woman who brags about it next day. It's true. So we need to make distinctions what excatly situations are we talking about, otherwise a lot of anger happens with all the crossed wires.

Both, not boh

But bricks, it dosent matter. The law is the law and is different now. Whilst women go out and do such things. A man who buys a woman LOADS of drinks to get sex, as described by retro. Her words. Would fall foul of the law. It was pretty clear. If you have to ply people with drink to get them to consent. Then yes that's rape. As when the girl sobers up, then she would be deemed not to have been able to give consent. Men need to be very careful.

So basically Jake, you are not really here for advice, just to justify your use of prostitutes to the unenlightened ones?

You ignored my question on page 4.

You are saying that the prostitutes you meet are happy and not being damaged by your choices at all - I am telling you I know of a very different truth. I (and others I worked with) too told punters all sorts of lovely life stories about ourselves - I was a biology student, a literature student, just in it for the extra pocket money (insert giggle), if asked why I was doing this I would quip - "well I like sex and I like money, so why not get paid for something I enjoy?" - all complete bullshit, saying all this whilst you are dying inside and feeling nauseous about the impending invasion on your body. If they don't say that then you won't return - that is the only reason we say those things. I had a couple of 'friends' and one notable 'landlord' (read violent pimp I was terrified of) - and I was your typical "independent escort", none of the clients would ever have been able to tell, you think none of the girls you 'visit' are pimped? I'd say a sizable percentage are.

You don't want to listen because you don't want to stop using prostitutes.

What a grim thread.

Perhaps read what women who have been in prostitution think about it. They tell a different story from the scumbag punters:

Former prostitutes are finding their voices

One day, in the not too distant future, men who pay to use women's bodies for sex will be treated as the criminals they are. No one has the right to use another human being like this, no matter how much money they have, and a man who has money to pay to sexually use a woman has too much money.

Nyac, I'm also for criminalising it, but what is your take on women paying male escorts, for the fairness of the argument? do you believe men are more in control if you go that route? and what about rent boys?

Women do it too is a bit of a crap argument really. It's a tiny tiny percentage of all the prostitution transactions in the world. But paying anybody for sexual services should be made illegal, so it would work both ways. Let's not only pick on male punters, although they make up the vast vast majority of sexual exploiters.

I don't expect to see many women in court however. Rent boys cater to the male market too.

Some people just don't feel aroused ever. Is it A- sexuality? If I remember rightly.

Can't help noticing the OP has sodded off. Guess a dose of reality was a bit too harsh for him?

Reginald D Hunter said he was sick of middle class white people taking offense on his behalf. This thread has made me realise I feel exactly the same as he does. And now that Houseofplain has a snippet of my life, she fucking understand me and my attitude

id like to thank you all for the input , and a big thanks to the women who have taken the time to inbox me with their thoughts , its nice to know there are some ladies out there with empathy and a bit of compassion for my situation.
i think i read somewhere that 1 in 4 men will in their life time of gone to a prostitute ,after reading some of the posts written by some very bitter man haters , i can see why, im surprised its not more than 1 in 4 !.

I don't think that the people on this thread are "man haters" just "rapist haters"!

Is that how you see any women who has the gall to point out that women, even prostituted ones, are human too?

i cant for the life of me see how a guy who pays a girl, who has advertised herself for sexual services be a rapist , sorry i just cant.

I can't for the life of me see why you'd have sex with someone who doesn't want to have sex with you, sorry I just can't.

i live somewhere quite rural and to be honest , i could meet up with around 30 girls within 10 miles of me , so its no big deal for them to be advertising, they want money, guys like me provide it.
if any of you want to inbox me, i,ll give you the site details and you can check your local area to see how widespread paid sex is .

What happened to you was awful retro.

But still, you have been using offensive terms on this thread, saying getting a woman drunk for sex isn't rape and generally, judging everyone. You are doing it again, presuming we are all middle class, white. That we have not walked that path you have. We are man haters. Calling me "woman" as a derogatory term.

Just because you have had an awful experience. You cannot expect it to justify you, basically being unpleasant and judgemental and talking rubbish and for people not to call you on it. You are eing quite unpleasant in your tone throughout. WHilst udnerstandable, it is not justifiable. You do have a bad attitude.

Oh op 1 in 4 that means 75% of men arent that disgusting. So you are in the minority.

They may want money. But they don't WANT to have sex with you Jake.

The term I used may be offensive to you but I know whores and whores call whores whores.

Funny, I've listened to women laugh about what they got up to last night down the pub after a few drinks. They're as bad as some men! The willing victims if anything.

And if you find being called woman derogatory maybe you need a pair of balls?

OP, why have you completely abandoned the subject of your wife/marriage/solutions? all you are posting now is justfications of what you aer doing, and going on about paid sex, it's futile agrument as people won't change their views in favour of prostitution. Prostitues damage their emotional, amd often physical health, even if you take away the morals of men out of it. It's a sad solution for both women and the men who use them - you sounded sad about your life in your original post!
Are you going to change the situation and try various solutions, or are you now thinking that you could as well go on as you do? many of us did guive you some constructive advice, and you never even comment on it ir what do you think about it _ ?

PS: as for my tone throughout, you had a problem with the word whore but refused to explain why, instead you got snippy with me! Pot Kettle lady!

likeatonofbricks....
ive listened to some of you and am planning a long talk and some counselling.
just a bit fed up with being labeled a monster thats all.

Retro it's true that some prostitutes use the word 'whoring' etc to descrobe what they aer doing, I think it partly depends on the background, like a girl from middle class family would call herself 'escort' as she is brought up not use 'bad' words and rely on 'soft' language, but many other women in the industry do use it, even if you read the press. Same s women getting drunk and laid and being 'ladettes' is true (and horrid, but it's their choice) - I think people on this htread ARE too sensitive to everything you write! which is not fair as you actuially write from personal knowledge and entitled to use the terms you want. Also 'woman' is not that bad, come on - it's half-jokey even, I was told off my ex-MIL once 'you must read this book, woman' - the book was about remarkable women (it wasn't malicious, just stern .

Willing victims, good god you get worse! I actually just feel pity for you tbh. I'm hoping that people ignore you rather than take offence to your drivel. As its understandable why your views are so skewed. But your attitude is still disgusting all the same.

You big man you. What a favour you do these poor prostituted women by just giving them money in return to sex. They need the money. You're just helping them out, right?