Facebook status updates you wish you could write. XXXX...

[Tigresswoods]

Following the success of this thread in "Conception" I thought I would share its cathartic qualities here in "Pregnancy" too.

I'll give you a starter for ten:

Tigress has no symptoms at 6 weeks except for exceptionally sore nipples

See, you can't write THAT on Facebook!

Tigress cannot believe she is booking in for an NCT course in April. Seems quite a way off and like another life?!

veryworried is tired of being tired and tired of all this darn waiting. hmpff.

AngelaCarleen wonders how her two new friends have got to 24 weeks without learning what an episiotomy is. And who's better off, them for being in the dark, or me who's been fretting about that since I found out I was pregnant??

Tigress is 12 weeks today!!!!!!

Tigress has her scan on Thursday and can then TELL people!

babydubai has very itchy nipples that are driving her mad!!

Graciegirl is 15 and a half weeks pregnant and feels really rather normal!! How strange!

Tigress missed her afternoon nap yesterday and didn't make it to 9:45 as a result

Thandeka waves at Graciegirl for being at same stage with similar history. (yay for cyber mumsnet twins!)

Thandeka is almost past the sickness stage but still not eating vegetables as they still make her feel funny. Yellow food is getting boring now.

Thandeka has loads of baby stuff hidden everywhere so DH doesn't find it and freak out, including a cot hidden behind the sofa (ebay bargain!).

Tigress nods in Thandeka's direction and gives her the thumbs up for the continued progress

Tigress must have a nap later!

NewbeeMummy will sit on and squash the next person who says "are you sure it's not twins?"

or

NewbeeMummy burst into tears after seeeing a picture taken last year when she still had her prepreggers figure and has no idea how she's ever going to shift the extra weight she's gained

or

NewbeeMummy wishes her friends without kids would understand me saying I can't come out on Friday as I tend to fall asleep by 9pm is not a lame excuse!

Sorry not having the best day....

JosieJo79 wonders if Sex really is the best way to bring on labour, and if i can be bothered to try!

Josiejo79 is due today and is pretty sure baby is not going to say hello.

Josiejo79 is going to strangle her sister if she texts me everyday to find out if i have gone into labour! It's going to get old and fast.

Woodhj is getting fat fast, only 17 weeks and already has 'the woddle'!!

Is starting to worry just how big i will get this time.

MiniMilk is so excited after her 20 week scan - all seems healthy & is very obviously a baby boy!! want to shout it to the world, lol, but resisting putting it on actual facebook so posting here instead! Cant wait to tell DD later, altho thinking maybe shouldn't have bought EVERYTHING for her in pink as nothing re-usable now! Oh well

Congrats Minimilk, glad the scan went well.

Josiejo79 is still pregnant and is living in 1984 in a big brother state. If i get asked every single day by my family until the baby comes if anything has happened i will scream! I will tell them when something happens, aaaaarrrrrgggggghhhhhh!!

MiniMilk has had really bad heartburn all day any solutions except for running out & buying loads of Gaviscon??!! Normally goes away when I eat anything but no such luck today, owww!!

AngelaCarleen is loving being pregnant today. For once not feeling ill (yet), not absolutely exhausted (yet) and wondering whether the second wind that your supposed to get in 2nd trimester has finally appeared (only three weeks late!)

Storked would like to say that it turns out the flu she mentioned the other week on FB was just masking the first signs of morning sickness. Now six weeks in, throwing up with the best of them, watching my breasts expand at a rate of knots, enjoying those delightful waking nightmares and sweats, and generally feeling like a big pile of poo. How'd ya like THEM apples?

Tigress is waiting for DH to get back home from London so we can go to 12 week scan! Problems on the train this morning, hope this is not the case this afternoon!

Woodhj forgot how wonderful feeling your baby move for the first time is!

Tigress saw her tiger cub on the scan monitor and has some lovely pictures to show the expectant grandparents this weekend

MiniMilk is exactly, if not slightly under, guidlines for weight gain at her stage in pregnancy...so why do I look so big??!!! fed up of everyone coming up to me & stroking/staring at my stomach before commenting on how huge it is!!!

*guidelines...cant spell now either!!

Oh & congratulations on your scan Tigress

Congrats Tigress, it's a great feeling

GracieGirl has just been asked by my friends 3 year old (his mum is 28 weeks pregnant) how the baby will get out. erm???? I've volunteered to babysit when his mum goes into labour so I need some ideas!!!!

I told my three year old baby will come out of my belly button (thought it a bit to early for the truth) But after watching a goat give birth on nature programme she ran around the house screaming asking why baby was comming out of the goats minky! so maybe the truth is best.