Late October Thread - 4

[DressingGown87]

Thread 4 ladies!

Girls: @DressingGown87 @Jaffas22 @DogCatDex @EmmaA96 (twins) @Parks11 @LadyB90 @Strawberries4days @LST87

Boys: @sunbreak @FirstSurprise001 @WaveStreet @roarfeckingroar
@Mc3209 @KitKatKit @1990shopefulftm @Lolllyf @HelenMarie1001 @Freddie1987 @BS9790

Suprise / Waiting: @60sPony @Monkeyseesmonkeydoesnt @UpsyDaisy1234 (twins) @Glooorb @AdventureAhead @Elizag20 @justtb @Clalou83 @Sls668 @SJR86 @Flora20 @SamK93

If I have missed you! Sorry!

@SamK93 ahhh sounds like a really reassuring scan and what a great pic! 😄

@DressingGown87 debating booking one in a month or so! Are you?

@Elizag20 really sorry to hear you're going through this. The only thing I would say is try to think past the pain right now, whether you're decision would or wouldn't change once the initial hurt has gone. Then whatever decision you go with, trust your gut and I hope you have the best support around you for whatever's next 💛

@Clalou83 could not be more jealous of that pool today! Brilliant idea 😆

@SamK93 aww that’s such a cute photo of his little face!

@Freddie1987 yes the MW asked today if I was going to do it. Just don’t know when is the best time to book? It says from 24weeks. I start my scan management at 28, so didn’t know whether to just book 25/26 x

@SamK93 wonderful news - so glad it went well today.

@KitKatKit I had a similar wobble a couple of days ago - you're not alone! The heat is so overwhelming it's hard to not feel irritable and that it's all just too bloody much. Are you feeling any better now? Hope so.

@Clalou83 oh my gosh PLEASE can I come over?

@DressingGown87 I ve booked a 4d scan for just before 28 weeks.

@DressingGown87 I think the latest you can have is 32 weeks for 4D so anytime before then. I'm thinking 29/30 to try and get as much of a clue as to what their features are like! 😆

@DressingGown87 do you have a MW appointment every week?? I'm so jealous if so.. I feel quite intimidated calling mine, like i have to have something serious it can't just be general questions.

Also (hopefully this isn't a stupid question) what is scan management?

@GhostWorld I'm the same as you, I don't want to trouble my midwife with questions lol. I haven't even seen mine since the booking scan, she's called me once when I was 18 weeks to see how I was getting on and that's it, haven't heard from her since then, no idea when my next appointment is either x

Thanks everyone will get one booked in for 26/28 week ish!

@ghostworld mainly every week, sometimes they do miss a week. I’m high risk so under a specialist team, as I’ve had 6 MCs and lost my daughter in 2011, been diagnosed with 4 issues in my womb / fertility in 2016. so have to have my cervix checked, as they think it will need stitching shut at some point, manage my blood flow, and do heartbeat / rate checks. I do feel lucky that they are being so attentive, especially with Covid.

Scan management is where they monitor the growth in later pregnancy, usually every 2-3 weeks.

You shouldn’t feel intimidated ringing your midwife, they should be there to support you.

@SamK93 I d call them up and chase the appointment, I had to ring the community midwifes to find out how to book any after the 20 week scan as no one had ever mentioned that I had to sort them all myself. Waiting till next week to ring gp again as midwifes diary is only a couple of weeks ahead to get my 25 week appointment booked in.

I tend to jump to Google first and here if anything concerns me, any calls I ve made really are to chase appointments because I d only want to ask them something if there's no one else to ask first.

@1990shopefulftm I meant to say I haven't seen mine since my booking appointment, not scan, which was March. We shouldn't have to sort our own appointments out, from what I remember with my other two children, every time you have an appointment she should book you in for the next one at the end of the appointment. She didn't do that when she called me at 18 weeks, she literally just wanted the conversation to be over and done with. It must be hard and confusing for FTMs as how are they supposed to know when they're due an appointment? When I went to fetal med yesterday the consultant was shocked that I had no appointments as he did say from 24 weeks we should be having tummy measurements, blood tests, BP done etc.

@SamK93 I got lucky and saw a midwife after my 20 week scan but it being my 1st baby I had no clue when any next ones should be.

My GP is easy to get hold of so if I have to book all the midwife appointments from now on through them it's not so bad, just won't have that much warning of when they are but that's no problem as I m hoping to start mat leave at 28 weeks anyway just waiting on approval.

I have my own BP machine so been checking it weekly with that which helps me feel less anxious and I got my blood results about 2 months after they were taken as I missed out on a 16 week appointment but they all came back normal so I m not too worried about that, just want to hear their heartbeat and know they re measuring okay at my next appointment really.

@SamK93 @1990shopefulftm I feel for you guys that aren't getting regular checks and missing out on appointments. From what I can gather, its the regular / community midwife appointments that have stopped and suffered during the pandemic. Hopefully they get back to normal appointments soon.

@1990shopefulftm There is a flow chart at the front of your notes, to show when all your appointments should be. Contact your GP and see if you can book them appointments in advance with your MW, or try get them booked in at your 25 week (I think you've mentioned you have that booked).

@DressingGown87 gp refused to let me book my 25 week one yet, I ve got to call them back on Monday so I m not banking on being allowed to book the rest that much in advance really, which is okay if my mat leave can start when I hope, it's just frustrating not knowing but at least I ve the comfort of being very close to the hospital if anything got very concerning.

It does feel odd not getting any appointments and as a FTM I've got no comparison but it does sort of feel like I'm winging it! I've never met any midwife, I had a booking in appointment over the phone at 10 weeks, then I had to pop in for a blood test and urine check the next day but that wasn't with a midwife. I didn't have anything at 16 weeks as they cancelled that one and didn't even do a phonecall, and I was told the 25 week would be a phonecall and first face to face I've booked for 28 weeks so that's the first time I'll see a midwife. It does feel a bit neglectful to me but I've really got no idea what things should be like really

@DressingGown87 oh I'm so sorry, I feel bad saying I'm jealous I should have realised there would be a reason for the lots of appointments! Like @SamK93 said as I'm a FTM I don't know what is normal!

Thanks @roarfeckingroar I do feel slightly better today.
How are you guys who are working from home coping? I've got a fan in my working space and another in the front room, all the windows are open but I'm just feeling sooo lethargic its unreal! Am drinking lots of fluids and eating regularly. Wondering if my blood sugar or blood pressure is low 🤔

Re: midwives, I saw one at 8 weeks (before lockdown), then had my 16 week appt over the phone with a second midwife who booked in my 25 week appointment there and then, but obvs she couldn't confirm if it was going to be f2f or over the phone at that point of course.

I think I've been mostly okay with not seeing anyone in the earlier stages of pregnancy but now I'm getting bigger and there's more at stake I suddenly feel like I would quite like to see a human every so often, if only to calm FTM nerves

It is really nice to have you all for moral support and general chitchats though, so not feeling as alone as I might!

@KitkatKit would you feel confident getting a blood pressure machine or going to a pharmacy to have it checked if you re worried it could be that?
I ve been using a fan and sometimes an ice pack whilst working and plenty of iced decaf coffee.
I don't think the heat helps with sleep at all so that can't be helping how tired you feel.

I’m really struggling with the heat. Working from home and the only place to work is the kitchen (still no sofa, 3 months on! Thanks SCS!!)

You’re definitely not the only one feeling lethargic @KitKatKat. I feel like I need to take a nap every afternoon and no matter how much water I drink my head is pounding by bedtime.

When are we getting the thunderstorms again!? 😭😭

@KitKatKit sorry!

Sympathies to everyone suffering, it's so stuffy in our bedroom and my boyfriend has had to move his computer there to work because the attic is unbearable. So come bedtime I have to lie on the bed naked like an actual beached whale with all the windows open 😂I'm hiding in the cooler spare room or taking naps on the sofa like a granny.

I've heard putting a bowl of ice water in front of a fan helps!!

@FirstSurprise001 with you on the sofa woes, Sofology has only delivered a new armchair to us this week after over 3 months of waiting and no updates...hope you get yours soon x

Ugh the heat has been so hard, I usually prefer sunny days but the humidity has been so horrible! I've been sitting with my feet in daughter's paddling pool and the rest of me in the shade, or with a fan on in the house. The nights are definitely the worst... Like @Freddie1987 I've been doing the beached whale on a bed!

@1990shopefulftm hopefully they are more helpful on Monday and when you meet them face to face.

@GhostWorld don’t worry, I feel bad for having appointments, whilst everyone is struggling. Thankfully my placenta and cervix is holding out, and she is doing ok!

@FirstSurprise001 I think the thunder (hopefully) is due tonight.

I’m also struggling in this heat, under boob sweat is real! Lots of fans. It has rained a bit today here, so has gone a bit cooler. Hope your all ok!

Community midwife appointments are all still face to face in my area I feel really lucky! 24 week check with the midwife on Monday so hopefully I'll get all the mat leave paperwork so my manager can start processing it.

We had our follow up appointment with fetal med this morning, still low amniotic fluid levels but there is just enough he thinks to make sure lungs can develop. Growth looked good too, but still on the small side - which I'm not going to complain about!
They were happy enough to leave it a month before we have to go back for another scan...we celebrated with a trip to John Lewis to play with travel systems!

@1990shopefulftm I didn't even know I could get my BP checked at the chemist so thank you for sharing that!

@FirstSurprise001 No sofa sounds terrible, I'm sorry you're still waiting for it! And re: thunderstorms... there's still not been anything here so it's still warm AF

@Freddie1987 I've definitely been rocking the beached whale look this week

@SJR86 Sounds positive and retail therapy always makes everything better haha 😄

@SJR86 Can't wait till we can actually shop more freely not stepped foot in a shop. Shopping on line is not the same. All about the experience.