Pregnancy after Miscarriage

[sadtoday21]

Starting a new thread for all of us that find ourselves pregnant again after one or more heartbreaking losses. I know it is really hard to join a pregnancy thread after miscarriage and we all fear the worst will happen again, but let's go on this journey together and hold hands along the way.

This is a safe place for all the ladies on the first pregnancy missed miscarriage thread and for any newcomers who want to join - you are all most welcome! All of the ladies on here have suffered one or more miscarriages and most of us have had particularly difficult losses, such as mmc and other complications. You don't need to be pregnant again to join - you are also most welcome if you have had a loss and are trying again. But we will be sharing scan photos and details of the new pregnancies, in case anyone might find that to be triggering.

Tagging @Catconfusion @Amanda81 @Kiki061190 @3204ECL @Babypending @Ginmonkey84 @MrsMGE and please add anyone else I may have left off. Without further ado, let's start the roll call.

About me: Age 31, trying for my first baby. Previous mmc at 12 weeks in February (hb stopped at 9+4), this turned out to be a partial molar pregnancy and I was monitored by CX hospital for three months. CP in March.

Now 9 weeks, EDD in March, if I make it that long. Oscillating between hope and extreme anxiety every day!

@bananamonkey So sorry you’ve been anxious! My midwife said I wasn’t to panic about movements until about 22-24 weeks. I’m jealous you’ve felt something tho! I can’t wait! Are you considering a scan before 20 weeks?

@sadtoday21 What an awful experience! I hope you’re feeling better after your cry. Sometimes that is what we need. Great you’re starting to get flutters, that is still so early so I would t worry about anything yet. Everything has went fab so far! Baby is just growing away nicely in there ♥️ He’ll be kicking his mamma soon 👶🏼

I have our gender scan in 5 sleeps! This is the first time I’m excited for a scan. I just hope baby has been doing ok in there since the last time we saw he/she. I have no idea what we are having, my OH is convinced it’s a girl and I’m swaying towards boy. Neither of us cares either way but can’t wait to find out!

A good cry is always good @sadtoday21 sorry about the rude cow!

Thanks ladies, you have made me feel better. I think it’s just moved to a different place 🙈 the flutters are back but in a different area and far less noticeable. I think maybe you are more sensitive to them second time around as I could easily dismiss it as wind bubbles! I’ve been mostly off caffeine but stupidly had some cold coffee drink last night, then my dd woke me up at 3.30 and the worry took over, all my own fault! Also had a stressful dentist appointment as she said I need a mouth guard, I grind my teeth in my sleep but only when I’ve been drinking or am stressed, obviously all the anxiety this year has now damaged my teeth Also they’re at least £220 so I need to research if they’re really worth it.

So close to your scan @Kiki061190 it’s going to be lovely! My 20 week scan is 5 weeks away, feels like a long time but will try to be patient I think.

Wow hospital bag, it’s getting real @Amanda81, how exciting! I’d say pack twice as many pads as you think you need, a decent towel and snacks in case you get stuck in the hospital.

Good advice @bananamonkey - thank you. I also grind my teeth in my sleep when I'm stressed. I saw the dentist and she said that she would probably wait until after baby is here and then get the guard made. All should be done for free if you are in the UK as you get free dental care. My grinding is so bad and have a very slight over bite that my bottom two front teeth are quite weak and have started chipping.

@bananamonkey Are you in the UK? I was given a medical exemption card about 4 weeks ago which entitles me to free dental care.

Thanks, from my googling I didn’t think it would be covered by the exemption as its a band 3 cost that’s not essential but I might call them and ask. She also said I have some acid erosion and tried to sell me bleaching, apart from a couple of fillings my teeth have always been good so I left feeling like crap!

Busy day for me so I'll post properly tomorrow.

Just wanted to say @bananamonkey I had a mouth guard made due to grinding for free not long after I found out I was pregnant. It should be included under your exemption. Xx

Happy Friday ladies!

I had my flu jab and whooping cough jag yesterday. The whooping cough one has given me a sore arm. 3 sleeps until we say baby again. Can’t wait!

Good luck @Kiki061190, how exciting!

Well, I'm totally surprised but the hospital actually responded to my letter and offered to rescan me tomorrow morning. So, having a bit of scanxiety again - really hope baby boy is ok and we can see him this time around.

Hope everyone else is doing ok!

@sadtoday21 That’s fab! Hope the scan goes all well today ♥️

So, the last couple of days I’ve had a bit of brown blood discharge, only when I wipe and not every time I go to the loo but obviously I’m freaking out and thinking the worst.

Has anyone else had this?

Have another scan on Tuesday because at the scan last Wednesday they could only see a sac and nothing in it but the doctor said I was either not as far along as I thought (off by 4-5 days) or the pregnancy isn’t viable.

I’m trying to keep my hopes down basically so I’m not shocked in a bad way if it is not good news on Tuesday...

Hey @sadtoday21 I hope the scan went well. So pleased the hospital took your complaint seriously.

@Kiki061190 best of luck for your scan. I'm so excited to hear the sex. A bit jealous too as I'd love to know but we're trying to save the money.

I'm so sorry @Montii you're experiencing this. My understanding is spotting can be normal so hopefully just the baby bedding down and it's old blood. Good luck for your scan!

So yesterday I stepped in the scales fully expecting a stone in weight gain. My bump is pretty big for 17 weeks and I feel heavy. Turns out I've only gained 6 pounds which I'm really pleased with. It must be mainly baby and all the other stuff surrounding it. I've been eating generally what I want so it's a surprise.

I hope everyone else is ok! Xx

@Catconfusion unfortunately it looks like I am miscarrying again. Bleeding got worse today so my doctor fit me in for a scan and there is a yolk sac but no foetus or heartbeat which there should be at this stage. Waiting on HCG repeat results and will have another scan next week but pretty sure I’m out.

I’m pretty devastated, feel like i’ve let my family down 😞

@Kiki061190 good luck for your scan today! V. excited to hear your news!!! Xxx

@Catconfusion thanks! Good for you with only the 6 lbs weight gain! Probably your illness slowed some of the gain and now you are feeling better you can gain at a healthy rate! I'd also gained about that much at your stage, maybe slightly more now at around 8-9 lbs or so. Trying to stay off the scale, because it is a bit shocking all the same as higher weight than I've ever been, but I'm just focusing on eating healthy foods and going to the gym more! I already feel that the bump is slowing me down a bit/making it harder to move as quickly as before. 21+4 today!

@Amanda81 I'm so curious to learn more about what you packed in your hospital bag! Been reading some interesting threads on MN about this. What are you doing in terms of sleeping arrangements, out of curiosity? We've started to look a bit, but the options are really overwhelming! I personally like Snuzpod3 as I think the crib looks too big for a newborn, but DH is worried he will just outgrow it too quickly at 6 months and it won't be economical.

How are you doing these days @bananamonkey? I hope all is well!

Well, we saw baby boy again on Saturday, this time in much more detail. The sonographer did all the measurements and everything still looked fine. He is weighing 15 ounces, almost 1 pound now! Up from 11 ounces two weeks ago. It was amazing to see his spinal cord and organs in detail. I'm still thinking about a private scan later to see his face more clearly, particularly if he doesn't start kicking me more, maybe around 24/25 weeks.

One quick question for you all, did any of your midwives recommend you take baby aspirin to prevent preeclampsia? My midwife did, but only because she thinks I'm at higher risk because my mom allegedly had it and it's my first baby. The thing is, I'm not really sure my mom did have it and therefore not sure the higher risk thing is accurate. I hate to put drugs in my body if I don't have to and so I've been really indecisive about this and put the decision off, but I also don't want to risk preeclampsia. Any thoughts?

@Montii I'm so sorry to hear your news, that is absolutely devastating. Please relax as much as possible and drink all the wine. Thinking of you Xxx.

I'm so sorry @Montii please know this is not your fault and I'm sure you've not let anyone down. There is nothing you could have done. It's such an intricate process. Take care of yourself, rest up and I hope you're feeling better soon! Xx

Hey @sadtoday21 great news about the scan and seeing more detail. Try not to worry about the weight gain. I know it's hard when you're the heaviest you've been but it's perfectly normal and natural. I'm generally treating myself to foods I really fancy because I swear it's all part of giving the baby what it needs. I'm mostly being healthy now the sickness has stopped. Exercise wise I've started my physio for my hip problem and doing a bit of swimming. Just trying to get my heart rate up a bit while keeping exercise gentle. I'm not someone who exercised other than lots of walking before due to my hips so don't want to add in anything new or more vigorous.

With regards to aspirin I'm on 150mg before bed due to my age. I was under the impression it's perfectly safe. I'd say if your midwife suggested it it's fine. You could just take 75mg which is a really low dose. It just gets the blood moving around a little easier. Thrombosis and preeclampsia can happen to anyone regardless of risk factors. If you're concerned maybe chat to your GP. Xx

@sadtoday21 @Catconfusion Hi ladies! Back in from my Gender Scan and we are having a GIRL! I almost started crying. We heard her heartbeat and she is measuring bang on 16+4. Just delighted 🥰

Hey All

Really sorry to hear some bad news on here, there are just no words that I can say to make you feel better...but please do take good care of yourself.

There's also been some wonderful news on here today too. Great news on the additional scan @sadtoday21 and fab news on the little girl @Kiki061190. Delighted for you both. It's nice to hear the excitement in your words! Just lovely.

@sadtoday21 - I've been taking mini-aspirin (75mg) since conception. It's not done me any harm, and I was advised by the specialist to take it due to my age. I would speak to your GP if you are worried about it. I've also not made it to packing my hospital bag this weekend, got way-laid doing something else. Must do it next weekend or find sometime during the week! I follow the December due thread and two people have now gone into labour at 35 weeks gestation!!! I'm 33 weeks on Friday. We have gone for a next to me cot for the first 6 months @sadtoday21. We considered a Moses basket but decided against it as she would most likely grow out of it in the first three months. As we are not planning on having anymore children, we thought that we wouldn't make the most of it and the next to be cot was a reasonable price (£100) with the mattress included. We have a cot bed for her for when she makes the leap from our bedroom to her nursery. The cot bed will turn in to her bed when she doesn't need the baby-jail sides anymore.

How's everybody doing? I'm generally okay, starting to worry about movements occasionally, say when she has a quiet few hours, but then she gives me a boot to remind me she is still here. Perhaps a bit of anxiety creeping back in and swaying my mind to the negative side. We start the ante-natal classes on Wednesday evening and have a MW appointment on Wednesday morning. I still think she is breech as all the movement is low down still.

Xx

Oh how amazing @Amanda81 that you are so close to baby now! Thanks for your kind words. I am so excited and delighted with her. So full of love just now. Can’t wait to have her in my arms ♥️

@Kiki061190 didn't want to read and run. That's amazing news. So pleased for you. Lovely to see her again and know the sex. Will you start thinking of names now or wait until later? Xx

Massive congrats @Kiki061190!!! That's fantastic news, you must be so pleased. And so wonderful to hear the hb as well. So happy for you and your little girl Xxx.

Thanks @Catconfusion and @Amanda81 for the advice on the aspirin. I'm a bit worried now that I should have taken it sooner when the midwife suggested it after 12 weeks, but for some reason I wanted to get to the 20 week scan first. Do you think its ok then if I just start with the low dose tomorrow? I think I'm going to, been scaring myself reading about preeclampsia and now I know the family history even more concerned. I'm afraid I've eaten too much cheese in my diet too and need to cut it way down because of the salt. Do you ladies worry about this at all? Or AIBU?

@Amanda81 thanks also for the bed recommendations - there are so many choices! I also worry about safe sleeping, etc., (I swear I never used to be a worrier before now, honestly). I like the Snuzpod3 next to me cradle, but its about 200 pounds and only for first 6 months, so seems really expensive. Which brand did you get for the next to me cot? I can't bear the thought of a crib when he's so little, but don't want to spend a lot either on something he will outgrow so fast.

I'm also really sorry the anxiety is returning a bit @Amanda81, only natural at this stage. You've come so far and you seem like you have been really calm about movements until now, which I really admire! As you say, she is still kicking you and probably in breech so the movement is lower down. Don't hesitate to go in if you do feel things have changed though, that's what the midwives are there for. Antenatal classes, how exciting! What does that involve? I hope you enjoy it and that your midwife appointment on Wednesday brings some additional reassurance. Not long to go now until baby girl is safe and sound in your arms!

@sadtoday21 honestly don't worry. It sounds like your health has been good up to this point. I would start today on a low dose. Take it before bed as it's most effective then. Aspirin works pretty quickly so if you were heading for a problem it will help prevent it. Just let your midwife know you've started it at your next appointment. They will tell when you need to stop. I think it's about 36 weeks. Don't worry about the cheese either. I've had periods where I've craved cheese so feels like my body needs it. As long as you're not eating excessive amounts which I'm sure you're not it's fine. Xx

@Amanda81 it's so exciting packing the hospital bag. I'm sure it's perfectly normal to feel anxious at this point. The birth is not too far away and it's a huge thing. Is baby girl in a better position now? I just keep trying to remember people give birth every day and every minute. After Christmas your baby will be here. It will always be such a special time of year for you. Xx

@Catconfusion We have a name in mind for her which is quite meaningful to us. Do you have any names picked out? Are you going to find out the sex at the 20 week scan or keep it a surprise? How have you been feeling? These past two weeks I have genuinely felt myself which is nice, sickness gone and bump is still very small to the point it’s not obvious I’m pregnant so I feel like I’m in a funny phase!

@sadtoday21 I have no clue about baby aspirin but I’ve only heard good things about it previously. How have you been feeling? Still anxious? When did you really start to pop? I feel like I don’t look pregnant yet and I’m dying to get a proper bump!

Thanks so much for your kind words ladies, it was so nice to wake up this morning and say hello to my little girl 👧🏻

I’m so sorry you’re going through this again @Montii, I’ve felt the same but you’re not letting anyone down, I hope you’re feeling ok and being kind to yourself x

Fantastic news on the scans @sadtoday21 and @Kiki061190.

That’s so great that the hospital listened to you and were able to repeat the scan @sadtoday21! I don’t know much about pre-eclampsia or baby aspirin but I’d probably take it if you’re worried. I have a Snuzpod and will be using it again (although I ended up doing a lot more bed sharing than I expected as I had a bad sleeper!). They are pricey but I got a deal when Boots were doing a discount on all their nursery furniture so look out for offers. I know it’s not for everyone but I’d probably have got a second hand one otherwise with a new mattress as they’re used for such a short time they’re usually in great condition.

Congratulations on a little girl @Kiki061190! How lovely for you.

I’m doing ok, got my MW appointment tomorrow, scan isn’t for another 4 weeks but hoping to wait it out. Still getting some flutters in the afternoon most days so that’s helping. Am in the annoying period where my normal clothes are too small and my maternity stuff is too big so spending all day pulling my jeans up 😂